Is it Wrong to pick up a merc with a mouth in a Dungeon
by Dannyjensen
Summary: Long story short, a mission gone awry sends Wade Wilson into a world where elements of a RPG game is a crucial part of its society, sounds kinda like something right up his alleys, will he be able to fit in, featuring Wolverine. Possible romance in the future. Rated M for bloody violence, adult jokes and language.
1. Chapter 1

_Deadpool x Danmachi_

 _(_ _ **Deadpool:**_ _ **Featuring my fellow and best Canadian buddy, Wolvie the angry Mutie)**_

 _Is it wrong to tries to pick up a Merc with a mouth in a Dungeon?_

 _ **(Deadpool: Seriously dude, that's the dumbest name I have ever heard…next to that Kim K and Kanye's kid's name)**_

 _ **(Deadpool: Opening title~~~~~~ Nananananananananananananananana Deadpool~~~~~… hope they won't sue me for this…)**_

 _Chapter 1: This is like Skyrim or, Dark Souls right?_

 _New York City…_

Deadpool's face suddenly pops up in the screen, but not before he began adjusting the camera before he said " **Hi there, I'm Deadpool, you might have know me from movies such as "** _ **Deadpool, From Russia with bullet holes", "The Red Lantern with a cute butt" AND "Forrestpool 2: Fully armed Shrimp boats"…**_ **And today, I'm making my own blockbuster** _ **: "Wade and Wolvie 1: The Two Canadians"…**_ **Now with Bold dialogues exclusively for me, I was planning on inviting Punisher aswell but that guy wasn't much of a Team-player…,Spidey won't answer my calls, Reeds just have to be a prick and have Ben threw me out, and Stark, Ohhohohohoho~~~ Don't even get me started on that guy… he does have a nice minibar though…"**

Wade's self-monologue was interrupted by a deep, angry voice "Would you stop playing with that GoPro and Help me Wade?"

Deadpool then look away from his GoPro and look at the source of the voice, who turns out to be Wolverine, in his signature yellow uniform and have just done stabbing an A. I. M agent right in the neck with his Adamantium claws.

Wade grunted as he put the camera on his head, draw his twin Uzis and starts spraying at the poor yellow uniform clad A. I. M employees as she said " **Oh C'mon Logan! This might be the time for us to shine… Oh by the way, I though you're still… you know, Adaman-sicle?"**

Wade then look at the readers and whispered " **Dead of Wolverine, it's a must see, I won't spoil it for ya… well, since the title is kind of a major spoiler anyway"** as he holstered his Uzis, the proceed to giving an agent a wedgie, revealing the poor guy's leopard print undies before Wade draw his Katana and slice the guy's head off.

Wolverine just kicked an agent in the nads before he spun around and slice another agent's body in half then stab the guy who he've just kicked in the nads in the stomach then slice his upper body into three pieces in order to get his claws out of it.

Suddenly, a bullet hit Logan in the back, he yelped and turn to see Wade, pointing a Desert Eagle with the smoking barrel at him with an awkward expression as he said sheepishly " **My bad, kinda hard to tell you guys apart from those yellow suits, speaking of yellow suits…"**

As he said so, a bullet pierced Wade in his forehead before another hailstorm of bullets coming down from a high building, dropping numerous AIM Agents.

As Wolverine and Deadpool look up at the source of the bullets, they saw Frank Castle, the Punisher,with his hair slicked back,wearing his signature black kevlar body suit with white gloves and boots. Frank was holding a scoped M4A1, customized to his liking.

Deadpool then shouted at the unexpected help with a the bleeding hole on his forehead quickly healed " **I KNOW YOU SHOT ME BY MISTAKE FRANK! AND I FORGIVE YOU!"**

Frank smirked,which is a extremely rare expression for a guy like him "Yea… by mistake…" before he eject the empty magazine and insert a new one then continue firing down at the Agents.

Wade then draws both of his Katana then slice an incoming agent in half and said " **Now we have a gratuitous cameo… This should boost my chance at the Oscars… I mean, Mad Max won many awards and all I see was a bunch of chrome teeth-spraying Vin Diesel wannabes** **chasing a bunch of pregos and a one-armed chick that looks like a dude… That flamethrower Guitar was pretty cool though"**

Wade then pointed at a lone AIM agent who was running away, holding some sort of glass container with a purple, glowing crystal of some sort inside and shouted " **HALT! you fiend~~~~!"** as he was stomping on the crotch of a downed agent who was screaming in agony.

Of course the runaway agent still running, leaving Wade standing there and awkwardly said " **Hmm… I though it would work in real life…"**

Wolverine groaned in disappointment as he facepalmed himself.

Wade then shrugged as he draw one of his katana and threw it at the agent. The blade spins as it quickly catches up with the runaway and slices both his legs off.

Deadpool still seems to be surprised as he look at the katana flew right back to him as if it was a boomerang and said " **Wow… it actually worked…"**

Wade then raise his hand,attempting to catch the katana by the hilt, but only for it to slices through his wrist,cutting his hand clean off.

The merc then sighs " **I take that back…"** before he look at Wolverine and said **"hey Wolvie, mind giving me… A Hand HERE? Bwahahahahahahahahaha~~~~ Get it? A Hand!~~~, My hand was cut off… ahahahah… aw who am I kiddin'? worse joke ever…"**

Logan sighs as he pick up Wade's katana and hand up, handed them to his partner and said "God dammit Wade… I'm tired of being just your babysitter you know that…?"

Wade smiled as he putting his hand back onto his wrist,which the skins,veins and nerves began to reconnect and said to Logan " **Woahhh,woah woah woah Logan…Woah! I know we're been together for more than 200 issues and everything but you and me, we have a professional relationship and I like to keep it that way… plus you know Preston don't want me to bring any pet home, Eleanor would be thrill to see you though…"**

Wolverine blankly stares at Wade before he said "You know, part of me wanted to stab you so bad and the other part of me just say "Go for it"… But then I don't want to see Eleanor to become fatherless…"

Wade the unexpectedly peck Logan on his cheek and said " **Awww I love you too Wolvie…No Homo"**

Logan than pop his claws out, attempting to stab Wade for kissing him. But he was interrupted by Frank's voice from above "Hey lovebirds! I'd keep my eyes on that glass container if I were you"

Wade and Logan then look back at the glass container, which was shattered when the agent dropped it. And the crystal inside seems to be floating in mid-air and began to cracks.

Wade scratches his head and said " **Ummm…. I haven't pay much attention to the plotline… what was that about the crystal again?"**

Logan facepalm himself once again and said "MODOK was gonna use it to create a black hole bomb! Did you even read the reports that Xavier gave us?"

Wade awkwardly replied " **I though it was some sort of Pamphlets for his fancy schmancy school…I mean, you guys DID tried to recruit me once"**

Logan said "We didn't do that…"

Wade then said " **Wait... did you guys happen to have a student that looked like… how do I put it…a moody teen girl with shaved haircut who shot flame out from her body?"**

Logan awkwardly shook his head "N-no…"

Wade casually shrugged " **Oh… wrong version, my bad…anyway back to the black hole crystal… what to do…?"**

Logan said "Who do I looked like? Reeds?"

Wade casually replied " **Nah, you look kinda like Hugh Jackman but… hairier…"**

Logan then snarled "Ugh… I hate that guy…"

Just then the crystal completely shattered, and create a massive purple-ish black hole and began sucking everything in.

Wade then casually said " **Welp, since we're gonna be suck into that Black hole thingie as most cliché storylines always leads to… Might as well pack my things…"** before he quickly ran into his apartment,which was conviniently resided just right across the street, leaving Logan, who was trying his best to keep himself from being sucked into the hole by dugging his claws into the ground.

 _5 minutes later…_

Wade casually walks back out with a big backpack, the guy was whistling as he said to himself " **Okieee~~~ My X- Force uniform,nice to wear Grey and black for a change,pretty silky on my skin aswell, that breezy short sleeves uniform from the Weapon X storyline, my pink bathrobe and fuzzy slippers, and lotsss~~~ Of guns…"**

Wade then walks toward Wolverine, grab his hand and said " **Ya ready Logan?"**

Logan snarled at Wade "WADE! DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE!"

Wade then said " **That's what Rogue said last night!"** before he threw Wolverine into the hole before he jumps into it himself as he yells " **TRY AND FIND ME NOW YOU IRS JERKS!"**.

Upon witnessing what just happened, Frank casually pulls out his cellphone, dial some numbers and wait. Moments later, when someone on the other side of the line picked up, Frank said "Xavior? It's Frank Castle… Listen, It's about one of your boys… Wolverine… Yes, it's Deadpool related… Y-Yes, he gave me your number…"

…

 _Somewhere else…Inside of cave system of some sort…_

A young man with silver,short hair with a light brown jacket was running his butt off frantically from what seems to be an angry Minotaur. He managed to dodge a couple of the monster's earth shattering punches thanks to his speed but ultimatly lose his balance when he trip on small boulder lying nearby.

He quickly get up and turn around, facing the Minotaur, its eyes was glowing red and it's readied to squat him like a bug. The young man gulped, he can't even move, the fear have paralyzed his whole body.

He then though to himself "…T-This is it… I'm gonna die… that thing is gonna turns me into a human patty with one single attack… why did I even think this would be a good idea?"

As the Minotaur raised its gigantic fist, it suddenly stopped and in just a split second, its body was sliced into numerous bloody pieces, spraying blood right into the young man's face and killing the monster in the process.

As he was still frozen in awe, he saw a glimse of his savior, a beautiful young woman, with a silkiest blond hair he have ever seen. She sliced through the Minotaur as if it was a piece of paper, considering her thin,and seemingly frail body.

The young woman then look at him and asked "Hey uh… Are you ok?"

The young man then nodded "Uh…Yea, I-I'm fine, Thank you"

The young woman then said "I'm glad you're alright, but It's really dangerous to wandering around these Dungeons alone…"

The young man lowered his head, acknowledged his mistake in silent.

The young blond woman then said "Listen…my team have already cleared most of this floor, you should head back out…I have some urgent matter to attend to aswell, until we meet again…" before she dashes off further into the dark pathways ahead.

It took the young man a while to regain his composure and get back on his feet, he didn't bother wiping the blood off as he look around for a moment before he decided to run back to the exit.

However when he reaches the second floor, the young man was stopped in his track by some werewolf looking monsters and they looked hungry.

The young man gulped as he draws his weapon, a short and dull looking sword while the werewolvess growled and shows their sharp,bloody fangs and ready to pounce at their prey.

However both sides was interrupted by a painful growl from the distance. The young man and the monsters turned to see a upper body of another werewolf being thrown toward them, it was sliced clean off.

Then they heard voices from the same directions, one of the voices said "Do you even know where we're going? And what the heck is this… "We're in some sort of video game" crap anyway?"

Then another voice replied " **Oh c'mon Logan, it didn't even seems strange to you that a fucking chest just pop right out of that two-headed rat that only as big as my foot that I killed when the hole spit us out? Not to mention I should have reload my pistol like… half an hour ago, and I believe I shot that werewolf like 30 times with the same 8 rounds magazine before you slice it in half… That's some classic video game logic dude… and trust me, in my years of playing Diablo, If you see a bunch of enemies in a Dungeon, it means you're going the right way…"**

The werewolves then focus their attention on the two men who just killed one of their kin emerges from the dark pathway, one man was wearing a yellow costume with black boots,black gloves with three metallic claw sticking out from his fist, there seems to be blood dripping down each claws, he also wear a yellow mask with two pieces of black fabric that shapes like a pair of pointy ears covered his eyes.

The other man was wearing a red and black body suit, with pouches strapped onto his torso, two swords on his back,he was carrying a strange looking weapon on one hand and a big bag on his other hand. The man wore a red mask,with a hole on the forehead, and two black patches that covered his eyes.

Once the two man, which turns out to be none other than Logan and Wade saw the werewolves and the young man, Wade said " **Told ya! There's an NPC… anddd~~ possibly a boss fight"**

The young man still not sure what to say when he saw the strange looking men walking toward him and his would be killers.

The werewolves however didn't waste a moment as they all pounces at the two.

Wolverine quickly slice the first werewolf in half before he lunge toward another one and drove both set of claws into its face, killing it instantly. The X-man then dodge a claw attack from another werewolf before he slice the monsters gut open with an claw uppercut, spilling the monsters intestine everywhere.

The young man was still frozen from witnessing the brutal fight between the two outlandish men with the monsters. He turns his eyes to Wade, who have dropped his big bag and draws both of his Desert Eagle and filled one of the werewolves full of holes before he switches to his twin Katanas and slice another werewolfs head off, then spun around kick another werewolf in the face before he slices both its arms off.

Wolverine then proceed to slices the armless werewolf into raw steaks by driving his claws downward.

Wade and Logan then turns their attention to the last werewolf, who seems to be hesistated to attack them after witnessing what the two men did to its kin. The monster took a couple steps back before it decided to high-tail away, but only to shot dead by Wade.

Logan retracted his claws and brush the dust off of his outfit while Wade took a long sniff of the smoke coming out from the barrel of his .50 cal sidearm before he said " **Ohhh yeaa~~~ if only I can do this to those sissy "werewolves" in Twilight… I mean, those denim shorts-shorts are already a dead fucking sentence"**

The two guys then look at the young man in front of them, frozen with both fear and awe for a bit before the young man said "Uh…uh…I eh..Thank you"

Logan shrugged "Don't mention it kid, what the heck are you doing in a place like this anyway? Not to mention…what is this place?"

The young man then slowly approach Logan as he said "Oh this is one of the Dungeons in this region… I'm an adventurer, it's part of my job to explores there places… I-I take it that you two are not from around here?"

Logan then said "Well, we're definitely not from anywhere around here…it's a long story…"

The young man then said "I see, but we should get out of here first..." he then look at Wade, who have just turns a werewolf's head into a helmet and wave at the two " **Hey Logan look at me! I'm Princess Mononoke!"**

Logan then said to the young man "Don't ask me, that's him being normal…"

…

 _Later, in a town nearby…_

As the three was walking along the streets, under the stares of the townfolk, couldn't really blame them since no one have ever seen "people" like Logan and Wade before.

After listening to what the young man was explaining about his line of work and a short version of his society's structure, Wade said " **Ok ok, lemme' get this straight… pardon the expression..since I could have swore you were a girl.. You're telling me that being an "adventurer", you get to explores deep,dark,wet,smelly,possibly haunted Dungeons, meets pretty chicks with slutty armors, joining these eh.. "familia" thingies and most of all, fight monster to… increases your STATS? Like in those RPG game?"**

The young man then said "Well I don't know what is this "RPG game" you mentioned but..yes, That's how my line of work is…"

The young man the slapped his forehead before he said "Oh I forgot, my name is Bell Cranel"

Logan replied "Just call me Logan, or Wolverine…"

Wade then said to the young men,whose name is Bell " **Pool,Deadpool, Wade Wilson… but some people… including Logan here, calls me Wade, or sometimes "God Dammit Wade"**

Bell then said "Deadpool… that's a strange name mister, and eh… what's with the masks?"

Logan then took off his mask, revealing his signature hairstyle and facial hair, including his intimidating expression for a brief moment before putting it back on without saying a word.

Bell the turned to Wade who have took off his mask, revealing his grosteque face,which was severely disfigured from the Weapon X experiment, there are several dead skin tissues and exposed blood vessels being exposed. His eyes, under the white contact lens on his mask doesn't seems to have any pupils, instead it was just two yellow-green glowing eyeballs.

The sight of his face made lost of people screamed, even puked upon laying eyes on it. Bell is no exception as he jumped back and yelped as he said "Wha-what happen to your face?"

Wade put his mask back on and said " **Not a long story, but I'm too lazy to explains…"**

Bell then said "I-If you say so mister Deadpool…Oh, before we head to my home, I eh… got something to do first… follow me…"

…

The two follow Bell into what seems to be a Guild Hall of some sort, Wade and Logan follows Bell toward a desk with a female elven with short hair, glasses and a neat suit sat behind.

Bell quickly shouted as he waved at her "Miss Eina~~~!"

The female elf, whose names seems to be Eina look at whoever called her name and jumped in shock as she saw the young man, with blood covering his face ran toward her.

The elven, whose name seems to be Eina took a sigh of relief before she said "Geez Bell… don't do that… anyway, what's with all the eh… blood anyway?"

Bell then excitingly told Eina how he nearly lost his life to a Minotaur and being saved by a beautiful blonde woman, who he seems to recognized as he ends the story by asking "So, could you show me Aizu Wallenstein's profile?"

Eina sighs "I see…very well, gimme' a moment…" as she walks toward the enormous file cabinets behind her.

In just a brief moment, she came back with a paper in her hand,claded in a pair of black leather gloves and starts reading " _Aizu Wallenstein, a swordwoman who carries the central burden in the [Loki Familiar]… She once wiped out an entire army of Lv.5 monsters all by herself, thus earning her the title of [War Princess]… Anyone who approaches her with indecent desires is either honorably perished or crushed in disgrace.. She also just broke the record for a thousand of rejected courtship…"_

Before Eina can continues, Wade cuts her off " **Pfff… War Princess? Where did you people get that title from? Those japanese hentai with a proper plotline? And that "Wipe out an entire Army? I can do that with all of my limbs chops off"**

Eina then notices the two strangers accompanying Bell as she pointed at Wade and asked Bell "Who're they?"

Bell then quickly replied "OH! This is Deadpool, His real name is Wade Wilson and this is Wolverine, he told me to call him Logan… I eh… I ran into them in the Dungeon where I met miss Aizu… they too have saved my life"

Eina then look at both of the two men for a bit before she said "Hmm… I don't remember seeing any of your profile in the database… you two aren't around here are ya?"

Wade once again said in a mocking tone " **Oooooo~~~ Nothing gets by you doesn't it much-less badass Tauriel?"**

Eina tilted her head and asked "Who?"

Wade quickly replied " **Nobody…"**

Eina then smirked "Tell me mister… Deadpool… I'm not judging or anything but…could you tell me what makes you think you can… best miss Aizu's accomplisments?"

Wade confidently said " **This!"**

He then said to Bell " **Get a load of this kid"**

Wade then said to Logan " **Wolvie stab me in me noggin' "**

Without a second of hesistation, Logan's claws pop out of his fists, startled some passerby and Eina herself before he proceed to driving the claws into Wade's skull,causing blood to spew out uncontrollably, making some women in the crowd screamed.

Even Eina briefly screamed as she saw what just happened. However she screamed again when she heard the man with the sharp set of claws still inside his brain suddenly spoke to the man that just stab him " **Ouchhe!Really Logan? You could at least pretend to protest like "Dude I don't wanna stabs you, you're my BFF" or something like that… sheesh"**

Bell's face went pale as he witness what just happened, he look at the onlooking crowd to see a couple of women actually passes out and some guys was covering their mouth, trying to hold down their barf.

Logan then pulls his claws out and smirked at Wade "You're welcome"

Wade then turn his head, showing the horrific stab wounds on his head to Eina who was trying her best not to back away. And to her and Bell's surprise, the wounds began to close up as if they weren't even there.

Astonished by Wade's strange ability, Bell asked "Wh-What happened to you?really…"

Wade then lean closer to Bell's face and whispered " **I'll tell you later tonight in bed… if you'll be a good…beautiful boy… That came out wrong…"**

Bell's face was crimson red while Logan once again facepalmed himself.

…

End of Chapter 1

 **(Deadpool: Seriously? That's all for this Chapter?Hey, is there gonna be something between me and that…eh… kid? I hope there is…)**


	2. 2 muties walks into a bar

_Chapter 2: 2 mutants walks into a bar._

 **(Deadpool: You know if only that title actually have SOMETHING to do with the STORY, People would actually like your writing better)**

 _Still at the Guild Hall…_

"Th-That's… that's a truly interesting ability you got mister Wilson…" Said Eina as she lean closer to have a look at where the 3 stab wounds on Wade's head once was.

Wade seems to be pretty proud as he said " **Pretty neat eh? Wanna see what I can do with my brain?"** as he grab his katana and draws the blade closer to the cranium part of his head, seems like he's attempt to cut it open.

Both Eina and Bell quickly held his hand down, with Eina pleaded "No no no no no no… NO! You've made your point mister Wilson… I've seen enough blood for one day…"

Wade seems disappointed as he groaned " **Awwww C'mon, My daughter loves it when I do it"**

Logan then said "That's not how it happens Wade…"

The scene then switch to Eleanor screaming "EWWWWWW Ew ew ew ew! Put it back in Dad put it BACK IN!".

The scene then switch back to the present, which Wade said " **Oh… so that's why Preston force me to wear a straight jacket everytime I visit Eleanor…"**

Eina seems shocked as she asked "You… have a daughter? … YOU?"

Wade grinned proudly " **Yeppp, She's my little angel… heck she's the most beautiful little girl that ever came out of my smoothhh~~~ squishy nads… I mean people actually mistaken me for some pedophile whenever I took her to the theme park…"**

Eina scoffed "I…find that hard to believe mister"

Wade then shove his hand into one of his waist pouches and pulls out a picture of him and Eleanor took at some theme park, she was smiling brightly next to Wade, who took his mask off for the photo.

Wade then shows Bell and Eina the picture as he said " **Ohh yeaa~~~?"**

As expected, both of them were in shock, Eina's eyes was filled with disbelief as she said "Oh my… she is beautiful… And I thought I've saw every crazy things there is…"

The female elf then cleared her throat, turns to Bell and asked "Alright… all that aside, Bell, why…would you want to look at Aizu's profile?"

Bell startled as he fidgeting "Well.. um…I eh…"

Eina quickly realize what's going on as she smiled "I see…. You're in love with her Aren't ye?"

Before Bell can reply her question, Wade suddenly cuts in " **Hey eh… While you two starts yapping about each other's crushes and giving out "Love advices"… I'm gonna take a short walk around the joint… see if I can score me some babes…"**

Logan, Bell and Eina was staring at Wade for a bit before he said " **… Just wanna give you the heads-up"** before he wandered off.

Eina once again shocked as she said "How did he know…" while looking Wade who walking toward random people, suddenly pulls his mask up and shouted " **BOO"** right to their faces, which causes them to screamed and ran away on the spot.

Eina then look back at Bell and said "Listen kid… You're not the only one who…well.. admires her, but you have to accept your current status… It's doesn't bring me any joy to say this… but she's out of your league.."

Bell knew she was going to say this, but she's correct nonetheless, he and Aizu are on two different level.

Eina then smiled "But… I'm not saying there's no hope, You have lots of potential Bell, just keep strenghten yourself…and In time, you may win her attention, affection maybe… Women are attracted to strong and reliable, you and I both know that…"

Bell's eyes lit up as he heard Eina continues "… Don't give up ok? … and uh… next time if you're gonna' explores a filth floor of a Dungeon… get yourself a team…"

Bell nodded strongly before he depart with Logan who was dragging Wade with him. But not before Bell shouted "I definitely will,Bye miss Eina~~~~ I really lovee you"

His goodbye seems to struck something inside Eina as she slightly blushes and said "That boy is hopeless…"

…

Logan, Wade and Bell was walking along the streets, once more being stared at by passerby.

It wasn't long before the three heard a rather smooth, warm voice from behind "Uh..excuse me?"

The three turned to see a young woman, who seems to be a barmaid from the outfit she's wearing. She was holding what looks like a small stone in her hand as she said "I think you dropped this sir…"

Bell seems to recognize the stone as he quickly check his satchel bag before he said "Tha-that's my magic stone… How-when di- Oh, thank you so much"

The barmaid smiled "It was no problem sir.."

She then take a closer look at Bell before she asked "Um… Aren't you the one who headed for the Dungeon early this morning?"

Bell scratches the back of his head and replied "Uh…well, yes… that's me…"

As he said so, Wade, Logan and his belly growls in a funny random melody when they saw the sandwiches inside of the basket she was carrying, which made the barmaid giggled.

She then said "Oh, you three must be hungry… Listen, um.. since the restaurants around here haven't open yet…You can take this… it's far from a regular meal though…"

Bell was both glad and hesistated as he said "Oh..uh… rea-really?"

As the young man said so, Logan and Wade already grab their own sandwiches and starts noming on it, prompting Bell to reluctantly took one for himself.

The barmaid quickly notices the lower half of his disfigured face since he have to pull half of his mask up in order to eat. She then asked "Hmmm… You two are not from around here are you?"

Wade chuckled " **Hey do we have to put a fucking sign that says "Interdimensional Illegal Immigrants" on our backs until you people stop asking or what? … Delicious sandwiches by the way,you made them?"**

The barmaid smiled "Why…yes, thank you"

She then look at Bell and said "Listen… why don't you guys visit the pub that I worked in tonight for dinner…"

Bell just blurted out "I-I will…Thank you"

The barmaid seems pleased as she said "Then I'll look forward to it…"

The maid then asked "Oh and uh, my name is Seal Flover…at your service"

Bell smiled back at her and said "And I'm Bell Kranel, nice to meet you…"

And with that, Seal walks off, leaving Wade, who's still noming on the sandwiches, and Logan who said to Bell "Geez kid… you have no clue aren't ya?"

Bell tilted his head and asked "Wh-what do you mean?"

Logan replied "You'll have to find that out yer' self…"

Wade then said to the two " **hey guys… I just realized I'm allergic to lettuce…oh wait… that's just one of my zits exploding… say, can we crash at your crib?"**

…

Upon arriving at Bell's residence, which is an old, rundown church-like building, with mosh, vines and cobwebs everywhere. Wade take a brief look before he said " **Damn kid, you live in a fucking mausoleum? Talk about desperation…"**

Logan then said "… Looks more like a church to me.."

Wade gasp before he suddenly hug Bell and said " **Oh you poor, poor little 8-bit era Square Enix male protagonist… I didn't think anybody could have a more horrible life than me…but to live in a CHURCH?"**

Wade then shake his fist at the sky while holding a blushing Bell with the other arm and shouted " **WHY GOD? What did the little guy ever done to you? You let those Flat Earth Society idiots run ramparts, that's fine and all, I mean I still hunt each of them down as a side hobby so I'd say I'm helping you out here… but you DO NOT, you DO NOT Make someone live in a fucking church! The only reason for anyone to be in a church more than 3 hours is either cleaning, stealing, kinky sex,listen to pedophiles confessions, church services, weddings…. NOT TO MAKE IT YOUR HOME!"**

Bell look at Logan and asked "Is he…usually like this?"

Logan shrugged " 'Usually' is an understatement kid.. but, he's not that bad once you get used to his constant yapping…"

….

"Heyhey You're home, welcome home" said a young girl,bare footed, quite short, small frame with quite a large pair boobs. She sport a form fitting white mini-dress with a diamond shape cut on the collar, revealing a portion of her chest and a pair of matching gloves with feathery outlines, she also have a blue ribbon on her collar and another ribbon tied under her breast and around her arms, she also have long, silky black hair that being tied into a pair of pony tails by a pair of sakura petals shaped hair pins.

The girl seems glad to see Bell as she quickly inspect his body while she said "You ok? Did you got hurt or anything?"

Bell then said "I'm fine Hestia, I told you before, I'm not gonna let you being left on the streets…"

Bell then turn to Wade and Logan then said "Wade, Logan, this is Hestia, my Goddess…"

Wade still staring at the young girl, whose names seems to be Hestia as he said " **Aw No fair, I want to be molested by a underage-looking Goddess too~~~!"**

Hestia seems grossed out at Wade's remarks as she pointed at the two men and asked "Who're these guys?"

Bell then said "Well… I eh, I met them in the Dungeon… And they're…"

Wade cuts Bell off as he steps in " **Long story shorts toots, name's Wade, Wade Wilson, but I prefer people calling me Deadpool… and that angry,hairy loveable sexy beast there is my trusty sidekick…"**

Wade pause when he hears Logan's angry growl and the sounds of adamantium claws pop out from his fist which startled Hestia. The merc then quickly said "… **My boyfriend…"**

This time Wade paused because Logan just drove his claws through the guy's skull once more, as reaction to his comment. Hestia shrieked before she jump back behind Bell, who was also startled.

Wade sighs before he continues, completely ignoring the blood dripping down across his mask and the claws still in his head " **… My trusty, overly close male partner…Ooo… that feels good… Logan,or Wolverine… I swear I still don't see any resemblance between him and a wolverine beside his temper and his body hair… Ooo a little to the right…Ohhh yea, keep those claws wiggling Wolvie…"**

Logan growls as he pull the claws out, which Wade quickly protest " **Hey~~~** **I didn't say you can Pull out! ...sheesh, rude much? I wasn't there yet!"**

Hestia seems to be shuddering as she saw the holes on Wade's head closes up while Bell just look at Logan and said "Uhhh, I think it would be better if you tell the story mister Logan…"

Logan sighs as he began "Look, me and him came from another dimension… where? You don't need to know…"

Wade suddenly budge in " **Wolvie here and me was experimented on, now his skeleton is made from Adamantium, a nifty type of indestructable metal… and I got this nifty healing factor… ANDDDD this Bea-uuu-tiful mug"**

Wade then took of his mask and do a duckface while winking one of his eyes, his grosteque face once again claims another victim as Hestia instantly passed out with foam in her mouth.

Wade then grab the pointy parts of Logan's mask and pull his mask off. The merc then proceed to stick both his index finger into both side of Logan's mouth and stretch it into a smile as he said playfully " **C'mon Logan, give the little Goddess your signature Canadian smilee~~~~~C'mon~~~ lemme see those maple syrup stained teethhh~~~~"**

After a loud thud was heard by the townsfolf outside Bell's house, back inside, Wades face was planted onto a nearby wall while Logan dusted his palm and put his mask back on.

Hestia seems very intrigue as she asked "Experiments? Like..as in, these abilities was forced into your body? Who would do such a thing?"

Wade managed to remove his face from the wall, it was heavily damaged, with a broken jaw and squished nose. The merc nonetheless casually re-adjust his lower jaw and his nose before the bones heal and mold it into place.

To Hestia and Bell's horror, the merc put his mask back on as he said " **I'll tell ya who, fucking uber nerds who didn't get hug enough by their moms and get their butt violated too much every monday by the mailman that's who!"**

Bell then asked "N-nerd?"

Logan just cover his face with both hands and lower his head while Wade continue " **It's like a wizard but wayyyyyy~~~~~ lesss~~~ cool, and without those long bushy set of beards, a wooden smoke pipe… long,white hippie hair, a robe made from gray bedsheets and probably got piss-stains on em' and so on…So… What are you doing with a Goddess,Pretty boy?"**

Bell then said "Oh you see, Every adventurers in Orario, that's the name of this city… needs to be part of a God's [familia]…"

Hestia however cuts in "..To simply put it, our powers will grant grace to the Adventurers who are under our contracts… Bell take your shirt off.."

The young man quickly does so before he turned his back, which was covered by a series of hieroglyphs toward Logan and Wade. Logan raised one of his eyebrow and said "Nice tattoos…"

Wade on the other hand said " **Ooooo, nice body~~~ kid, you do crossfits?"**

Hestia then pointed at the hieroglyphs and said "As you can see, this represent an Adventurer's status or _Faruna_ ,inlcuding levels and current obtained skills… each letters here can be and can Only be modified by a God, through the mean of fresh blood, or _Ikoru_ …"

Wade once again interrupt " **Seriously, Is it a must for you guys to use fancy words around here?"**

Hestia briefly stares at Wade before she clears her throat "…An-anyway, each modifications will chang the adventurers stats, such as attacks,speed, dexterity, Magic as the likes… it will also determine the adventurers levels and stores records of personal achievements… Speaking of which…"

Hestia then took out a small needle from her pocket and prick her finger. She then writes the blood from her fingers onto Bell's back, and in a blink, the hieroglyphs on his back began to changes. After Hestia done writing, she sucks on the pricked finger before she said "Alrighty, put your shirt back on"

Wade whistled as he said " **Kinkyy~~~~"**

Hestia then took out a piece of paper then waves her hand over it before giving it to Bell, as he look at the content, it reads:

 **Bill Kranel** **LV. 1**

 _STR … I 82 - H 120_

 _DEF… I 13 - I 42_

 _WPM ... I 92 - H 132_

 _DEX… H 172 - G 225_

 _Magic …_

 _Skill …_

Bell seems shocked as he re-reads the whole thing many times before he look at Hestia, then back at the paper repeatedly before he asked "uh, Hestia… did you eh…you know, mispelled something… because my stats just went up by 160 points… but I don't remember doing anything… you know, good enough to earn this much stats points…"

Hestia seems upset as she puffed her cheeks and said "Nope, it's just… You, are you saying I can't spell?"

Bell quickly said "No no no no no, I-I just wanted to know what did I do to earn this much points…"

Hestia didn't say a word as she march toward the closet, took out her cloak, put it on and said loudly "Maybe you should figure it out ALONE at dinner tonight with your new friends, I'm going to get-together with my colleagues… GOOD-BYE!" before she storm out the door and slam it shut.

Bell was still frozen as he said "What was that all about..?"

Logan then asked "What did she meant by.. "colleagues" anyway?"

Bell sighs as he said "You see she's not the only God around here… every other Gods have their own Familia… their reputations also plays a huge part in their Familia's growth… See, in order for it to growth, we need money.. and the amount of money each Familia managed to gather through Dungeon exploring or side quests depends on the amount of members in a Familia and how good they are…"

Bell then look down as he said "…So far, I'm the only member in her Familia…nobody wanna' joins us because she's not a well-known Goddess… so she have to help out with the money-making… she works hard day and night to support us both…"

As he said so, Wade leaned next to Logan and whispered " **This kid is the king of dense…"**

Logan sighs "For once Wade…I agree…" before he said "Look kid, whatever it was, you should wait til' she calms down and talk it out…"

Wade was rummage through his bag as he said " **Hey, remember that chick with the nice pair of Ta-tas we met this afternoon? Didn't she invited us to her pub?I'm Starvinggg~~~"**

...

"I'm pretty we met her around here…" Bell said as he, Logan and Wade was walking down the street, shrouded by the night sky above.

Logan take glance at Wade, who still wearing his holes ridden mask and red/black outfit. Wade also packed a AA-12 with a modified drum magazine on his back, along with his twin Katana and his twin Deagle before they stop in front of a pub with the sign on top of the entrance that reads " _ **The Mistress of Abundance"**_

Wade then scoffed " **You know it's funny… everything around here looks like the middle ages, everyone speaks English… yet for some reasons…all the signs is written in Japanese… Thank the 4** **th** **wall for that little translation texts floating above it…**."

Before Bell can say anything, Logan said "Don't mind him… he's like that a lot…"

Upon entering the place, Bell's eyes lit up as he saw catgirls, elves and all kind of sub-humans species, beautiful sub-human species to be exact, serving their customers with a warm smile on their face.

The young man's heart beat rapidly as he whispered to himself "Oh man~~~, this place is like… a little heavenly oasis of bishoujos…" while he sat down in a table in the corner with Wade and Logan.

Right as he said so, Seal suddenly pop out of nowhere and bowed to Bell and his companions and said "Welcome mister Cranel, I'm glad you could make it"

Seal then turns around and said "We've got another customer~~~"

As she said so, a woman steps out from the kitchen. She have a very firm and large body, not to mention she kinda look like a guy with long hair, either way, she's a attractive-ish, macho woman.

She gave Bell a big smile as she slammed a glass of water down on his table and said "Well well well, You got such a cute face for an adventurer I give you that kid… Anyway, I heard from a …certain source that you're a Horse-like glutton, yes? Well then, Spend lots of money here yer hear? I promise my food is gonna stuff that HUNGRY belly of yours… By the way, the name's Grand, Mia Grand, I'm the owner of this pub.. I guess you boys already meet my daughter, Seal…"

Mia then notice Logan and Wade's outfit before she said "You boys aren't from around here are ya? Well, no matter, love the outfits by the way"

Wade, upon seeing her, whispered to Logan " **Somebody call The Russian… I think I found his long-lost sister… must be adopted though, she looks like a supermodel compare to him… not to mention the much nicer attitute…"** which Logan just sighs in reply.

Bell was surprised when he heard the amazon-looking woman calls him a horse-like glutton, the young man thought to himself "wait… I nevet said… Noo…" before he swung his gaze at Seal, who quickly look away from him.

The young man frantically said "Wh-what the hell? I didn't say I was a glutton…did I?"

Seal giggled as she said "I'm just kidding, please enjoy the meal at your pleasure"

Bell slightly blushes at her smile and said "We-well then…I'd like a pasta please…?"

Logan quickly said "I'm not hungry…"

Wade on the other hand said " **Don't worry ladies, I brought my own food"** as he shove his hand inside the crotch area of his pants despise the onlookers's digusts and stares.

Wade then pulls out a Chimichanga, large size, covered with plastic food wrapping. The merc whistle casually as he unwraps the food, pull half of his mask up and starts eating.

Mia then pointed at Wade and said "He… have that…thing down his pants the whole time?"

Logan shrugged "That's not the only thing he kept in his pants daily lady…"

Mia, instead of feeling disgusted, she seems impressed as she said "He's a bold one isn't he… I like that…"

Wade quickly replied **"And you Madam, is a manliest,and most beautiful woman with the nicest set of boobs I have ever lay eyes on…"**

Mia smirked at his remarks, she seems flattered as she replied "… a REAL bold one..."

While Mia and Deadpool exchanging compliments, Seal sat down next to Bell, she saw the young man's plate is already empty. This caused the her to giggled before she said "You must be very hungry heh mister Kranel?"

Bell blushes as her comment before he said "We-well.. ye-yes.. I was…"

Seal then look at the customers and the other waitresses before she said "You know… my mom used to be a weathered adventurer before she opened her own business here… All of the employees are female, my mom even hires those with histories…with the law…"

She then look at the customers chatting, cheering before she said "I really like this job… there are all kinds of people coming in day and nights… each with different stories, past, hobby and the likes… I get to learn many different things listening to their stories…when they're sober and when they're dead drunk… It's maybe weird for some people but.. it's great for me…"

Bell smiled back "Yea… I can understand how you feel.."

The young man suddenly froze as he look at the entrance, his eyes lit up as he saw a group of adventurers entering the pub, among them was the same young woman who saved his life from the Minotaur, Aizu Wallenstein.

The group had certainly caused a sturs among the customers, they can be heard chattering to each others with such comments as " _It's them…", "The giant slayers… Loki Familia…", "The stars of the top class adventurers…"_

Bell then look down at the table and though to himself "What do I do…? Should I went over there and say "Hey, thank you for saving me?" … No, that would be too idiotic … maybe if I… No no no…what are you THINKING you fool? You are nothing but a stranger to her… come to your senses Bell… SHE is WAY out of your league…"

Bell then look at Seal, who said "Oh, their Goddess's Loki loves this pub… so, they're one of our loyal customer…"

As Seal said so, another thought came to Bell's mind " _…_ Wait.. that means I could have more chance of seeing her here…" as he look at one of the members stood up and declare a toast.

Bell then hear Wade,still noming on his Chimichanga as he said, slightly irritated " **And there's the typical elite group full of overly/midly sexualized punks who was born into silk and luxury who serves either as antagonists for one story arcs or as a hard-to-love good guys group… attracting attentions, praises and possibly a small-time protagonist that look up to them as idols and possibly foolishly trains him/herself to become as strong as them… they're most of the times comprised of the noble, calm, humble star player with a Kristen Stewart expression glue to their faces, an overly cheery one, a silent but deadly one andddd most importantly, The arrogant asshole with a superior complex one… pssstt.. they make me wanna barf…"**

While Bell and Seal was still shocked after hearing what Wade've said, thy were all startled when a member of Loki's familia, who seems to be a male werewolf slammed his glass of beer down on the table as he said loudly "So, tell us what happened to you yesterday Aizu…"

Aizu replied calmly "Pardon?"

The werewolf replied,still with an obnoxious loud tone "Remember? Those Minotaurs we LOST on our return? You killed the last one on the fifth floor didn't you? Yea, I'm talking about THAT TOMATO KID!"

His blunt comment was like a needle that stab Bell mercilessly in his chest as he froze solid on his seat.

One of the members asked the werewolf "You mean the Minotaur that fled on the 17th floor after a crushing defeat by us?"

The werewolf continues "YEA, and they miraculously escaped to the upper floor, So~~we have to chase them up there, And guess who they ran into? A Weak LITTLE COOKIE!"

Bell whispered to himself "That…was me…"

The werewolf still laughing and keep on with his insulting rant "Aizu then slice the Minotaur into steak skewers, splattering Cow blood all over that cowering rabbit's face… And he ran away just as fast as those Minotaur did!"

The obnoxious werewolf threw his head back and laugh histerically as he said "Our royal princess got dumped by the one she just saved! Wahhahahahahah- That was fucking fantastic, Aizu, the only one who can actually scares the fellow adventurers away…!"

The werewolf then clench his fists "I hate those weakling trash! I wish they all just DIE! Whats the point of being an adventurer if you're gonna cry like a baby?"

Bell's fist clenches and trembling with anger as he hears those hurtful words. Wade look at Bell's expression before he said with a low voice " **Guess we now know who's the superior complex asshole in that bunch…"**

Wade then look at Logan, who was sitting silently,watching the werwolf. When Wade look closer, he saw Logan was gritting his teeth and his claws slowly grows out from his fists, seems like even Logan couldn't stand this guy.

Wade then said with a playful tone " **Geez Logan, That is soooo not like you at all…"**

Logan said "I've dealt with tons of egocentric pricks my whole life, but I haven't met That fucking punk… I guess I've found someone who's far more annoying than you Wade…"

Wade then lean his head onto Logan's shoulder and said " **Awww, I knew you have a soft spot"** which Logan bluntly replied "Shuddup"

Then a female elf in the group suddenly spoke "Bate.. please… That's enough! Need I remind you that it was OUR fault that we let those Minotaur get away? Moreover, we don't have any right to mock nor insult him like that… I believe it was US who owns him an apology"

Wade then chuckled as he spinning his Deagle " **Guess that makes two humble and honorable members…"**

The werewolf, whose name seems to be Bate snarled "Pfft, yea yea yea, missy Elf 's always so proud and humblee~~~ as expected! What's wrong with calling Garbage "garbage"? "

Another member of the familia,who seems to be a female with a utterly flat chest and an outfit comprise of a pair leather sleeves, a tube top and a skin tight short-shorts, accompanied by a pair of above-knee height leather boots said "Would you please shuddup Bate? You're ruin the celebration…"

Aizu then said "You need to understand, he couldn't help it, espescially in such life threatening situation like that…"

Bate seems to become more irritated as he snarled "What, you're playing the good girl now? You would rather mate with HIM than ME?"

Another female member asked "Bate.. are you drunk?"

Bate snap at her "Shuddup bitch!"

He then look back at Aizu "I'll ask you again, ME or HIM?"

Aizu calmly replied "I wouldn't even consider picking you even if you're the last man on earth"

Wade seems impressed as he said " **Ooooooooo~~~~ you tell him girl"**

Bate was really pissed as he snorted "You just can't accept it can you? He's a weakling, a piece of trash who does not deserve to stand equally with any of US"

That sentence seems to struck something inside Aizu as her eyes widened.

Bell's teeth was grinding agaisnt each other as his blood boils inside. The young man was about to shot up and storm out of the pub when suddenly he was stopped when he saw a scary group of men march toward his table from the corner across the bar.

Most of them are big burly adventurers who seems to have notices Wade and Logan's odd appearance, and they doesn't seems to like it from the look on their scar ridden faces.

As their shadows covered Bell, Logan and Wade, the biggest one in the group, who have a big battle axe with spiked edge spoke "I don't remember ever seeing you here in Orario before strangers…"

Wade bluntly replied " **And I don't remember seeing a pig manages to shave itself, learn to stand up straight and speak humany before…"**

That comment seems to silent everyone in the pub, as they seems to recognize the big man's group aswell. Nonetheless, Wade's insult got the entire Loki's attention aswell as pissing off the apparent leader of the group.

Wade can hear some customers chattered " _Those poor blokes… of all people, they have to piss off the Black Thunder Gang…"_ and " _… It won't be an open casket for those guys…"_

The apparent leader chuckled sarcastically before he said to his underlings "Looks like we have a funny guy here boys… Do you clowns know who we are?"

Logan stay silent while Wade said " **Lemme guess… eh… The Black Shit gang? And what's with the scars? You boys got too excited with each other on orgy nights?"**

Seeing the angry veins throbbing on the leader's face prompt Wade to continue " **Seriously though** , **what's with the Conan the Barbarian outfit? I mean, Loincloth and rat skin boots combo? It might be ok to wear that for a housecall or fantasy sex night with your wife…or husband… But wearing it outside to fight monsters is like… not the brightest idea Imma tell you that big guy"**

The gang leader crack his knuckles as he snarled "Oh I'm gonna enjoy pounding you you little red vermint!"

Wade still doesn't seems to care as he said " **Woah hoah hoah, slow down big guy, I have specific rules… I normally date people for like… 5 days before decide whether I'd let them pound me… It might take more than a month in your case thought…"**

That was the last straw for the leader as he yelled angrily and swung his fist at Wade's face. But before his fist can collide with Wade's face, a loud gunshot startled everyone, including the Loki Familia.

The leader, the bar patrons,Aizu and her teammates look at the leader's head, which was blown into bloody bits by the sheer force of the Deagle in Wade's hand.

The headless corpse then fell limp on the ground, spilling blood all over the floor, leaving everyone frozen with shock as the gaze upon Wade's strange looking weapon.

Logan still casually sitting on his chair, drinking his beer nonchalantly, even give out a burp, breaking the awkward silent.

Wade then look at the rest of the gang and said " **Alright you screwheads listen up! This hear is called, a Gun, where I come from this is the top tier weapon-of-choice for the finest "adventurers" , all you need to do is point this smoking hole at anyone who you truly despises… such as your ex-wife/husbands, your pedophile teacher, your telltale neighbors…"**

Wade then glance at Loki's team, specifically Bate as he continues " **… Arrogant pricks who think they're gods and piss down on the weak for fun… and pull this little trigger right here… you already see the result…"**

Logan look at Wade who still giving his speech and sighs "Really? Evil Dead?"

Wade then said " **Now, I could just blew all of your heads off right now and walk out that door…but that wouldn't be fair, so…"**

Wade then took off his waist holster and his AA-12 and gave it to Bell, who awkwardly took it before he continues " **... How about I fight you bald Sylvester Stallone evil clones with only ONE ARM?That should even the odds…"**

Wade's offer seems like a joke to the gang members as they laughed histerically, even Bate laughed.

However their laughter was deminished when they saw Wade draws one of his Katana and slice one of his arms clean off and hold it by the wrist as if it was a club. Seeing the blood fountain coming from his dismembered arm and his armless shoulder froze everyone in Loki's team and made many patrons puked.

Wade then said " **Like I said, One. Arm!"** before he charge forward and beat the first gang member senselessly with his own arm.

The other gang members was too shock to witness such a bizzare scene that they can't even have the will to attack Wade.

After finishing turning the thug's face into a unrecognizable pile of blood, Wade then swung his club-arm at another gang member, hitting him in the face repeatedly before he dodge a sword slash from another thug before he threw his arm at the thug's face, then shouted in a high pitched voice " **Cock shottt~~~~"** and ram his fist right to the poor bastard's crotch, rendering him twitching on the floor in pain.

Wade then look at the last standing thug before he said " **Hope you have lube buddy… you're going to need it…"** as he pick up his arm.

The thug finally made a smart move and attempt to flee. Wade shrugged as he drop his arm and said " **Kid, the long,black gun, throw it to me"**

Bell quickly follow his instruction and threw the AA-12 at Wade. The merc caught it with his remaining arm,held it to his hip and hold down the trigger.

In an instant, the thug's legs was torn to shred, then comes the rest of his body due to the ungodly power of the Fully automatic shotgun. The repeated earth shattering sounds from the gunshots struck fears to the patrons as they back away from Wade as far as they can.

Wade then turn to the groaning thugs on the ground and held down on the trigger again, which leads to his shotgun tore them to pieces aswell.

Aizu and her teammate look on in awe as Wade stop firing and threw his AA-12 back at Bell, who once again caught it before he pick up his own arm and causually put it back to where he slice it off.

Wade then held it in place for a couple of seconds, and to everyone shock, the skin tissues began to reconnects and moments later, Wade's earlier dismembered arm was completely reattach itself and was able to move normally as if it wasn't cut off in the first place.

The female elf in Loki's team said "Such… strange power… I've such abilities before…"

The other female member replied in awe "Did you saw it? His arms heals in just seconds…. What in the name of the Gods…"

Wade put his equipments back on before he said to Mia " **Hey eh... you wouldn't mind if we work here tomorrow to pay off our beer tabs would ye?"**

Since neither Wade nor Logan have any of Orario's currency, it's only normal if things like this happens. Logan doesn't even seems to be bother as he shrugged "Fine by me…"

Mia look at the mess Wade made before she sighs "Well, you did single handedly trash my place… so.. you're hired…"

Wade grinned under his mask " **Welp, then see ye tomorrow, let's go kid…"**

Bell then follow Wade and Logan toward the exit. However, Wade then stop in front of Loki's team then pointed at Bate and said to the female elf " **You fancy pants better know how to keep your dog under control… it made my little friend here uncomfortable…"** before he walks out with Bell and Logan.

Bate snapped at Wade as he getting out of eyesights "WHO DID YOU CALL A DOG YOU WEAKLING?"

The female elf shrugged "To be fair Bate, you did own them that after the hurtful tirade you put on earlier…"

Aizu on the other hand was look at Bell, who she've saved ealier that day as he fades into the night.

…

As the three walking back to Bell's home, Wade look at Bell,who have his head lowered and a despair expression on his face before he asked " **I know you mad kid… but… since I'm not an expert at comforting people soo… I'll be quiet"**

Bell then said "He's was right… I am a weakling…and yes, I am mad… I'm mad at myself…I wasn't strong enough…all I ever good at was running…"

Wade then said " **So what? You're trying to impress that blonde chick, not that Pokemon boy… Heyyyy~~~ that was a pretty good…"**

Bell,while flattered by Wade's comment, tilted his head and asked "Po-Pokemon?"

Wade " **You don't need to know kid… Sayy~~~~ do we have to share the same bed or what?"**

…

End of chapter 2


	3. Come to daddy

_Chapter 3: Come to daddy_

 **(Deadpool: Ok, first…Sir, I am OFFENDED for being called a Mutie in the last chapter, I prefer… Normality Challenged indivinduals… it sounds jusssttt~~~ HEY I was JUST KIDDIN', what do I looked like, a fucking Social Justice retard?"**

 _Much later, at Bell and Hestia's house, midnight…_

"What is he doing outside this late? … was it because of what I say to him?" Hestia groaned as she pacing back and forth near the front door since Bell,Wade and Logan still haven't come home long after she had.

Suddenly she heard knocks on the door, the petite Goddess rushes to thw door and open it, so see Bell, with some cut wounds and bruises on his body but nothing serious. Logan only have some holes on his outfit, no wounds in paticular, while Wade on the other hand, have a onyx black colored monster's arm stuck up his butt, a couple of swords still stuck in his chest and a knife in his head. His red uniform was torn to shred, leaving only most of his mask, and boots unharm and having his boxers with tiny Punisher skulls print on it and his horrid disfigured skin fully exposed.

Bell was holding Wade's AA12 and have Wade's twin Katana rest on his back as he said to Wade "You weren't kidding when you say this thing 'Shotgun' pack a punch mister Wade… my arms are still sore from using it…"

The three casually walks in, passing a shocked Hestia before she run to Bell and check on his wounds and said "Wh-what the heck Bell? Did you went into the Dungeon again?"

Wade was pulling out the swords in his chest as he said " **Sure did yer' grace, Man you should have seen him go…He was like Swoosh, Shitckkk… Ohhh he even when Mike Tyson on some of those frog monster thingie… He was seriously PISS OFF, and I don't mean regular Piss off, I mean MMA-Female-featherweight-champion-on-her-period-Piss OFF!"**

The merc then grab the monster's arm, took a deep breath before he pull it out,the pain caused him to shouted " **MOTHER-TERESA's PANTIES, OWWWW… It's like that time with that kinda hot, horny alien chick… except it's the opposite in this case… Anyway… After I gave him that big,heavy and black metal monster he's holding in his hand… he just went all THUM THUM THUM THUM THUM THUM THUM on those beast… Did you know that his butt jiggles in a very cute way everytime he pulls the trigger?"**

His sentence made Hestia frozen and leave a big shade of red on Bell's face.

Wade then said as he help wiping off some bloodstains on Bell's face as he said " **And I tell ya, this Dungeon spellunking gig is a GREAT bonding activity, in fact,me and little pretty boy here actually got closer to one another then ANYONE ever did"**

…

The scene then quickly switches to the Dungeon, and shown that Wade's upper body was dismembered from the lower half of his body, and his upper half somehow ended up on Bell's head, covering his whole head way down to just below his shoulders.

That means Bell's face is technically inside Wade's intestines as the young man screams and run around frantically. Wade on the other hand was firing his twin Uzis in all direction as he said " **Nice teamwork kid! Ever thinking about become a merc? Or a stripper?"**

…

The scene then switch back to the present, Hestia's face was pale as she stared at Wade then grab Bell by his collar and said "You idiot! What were you thinking going to the 6th floor WITH THAT PSYCHO?"

Wade then whispered to Logan " **I think she's talking about you…"**

Bell smiled sheepishly "Ho-How'd you know?"

Hestia then pointed at Wade, who was scratching his back with the Onyx black monster arm and said "That's a War Shadow monster's arm… and those thing only spawn on the 6th floor"

Bell then smiled at her and said "I-I'm sorry…"

Hestia then help Bell up and said "Look,we'll talk about this later, you go take a shower and I'll heal ya…"

Wade budges in " **Can I…"**

Hestia swung her head at him and said "No" before she took Bell inside.

Wade shrugged " **Well,** **I was asking if I can take a pee first before she tries to get in his pants in the shower but she said No… Now.. what can I pee in around here…?"**

Logan cracks his neck and said "Just take it outside Wade…It's been a long day and I'm too tired to went along with you shennanigans…" before he lie down on the ground in a nearby corner and starts snoring.

Wade then look around a bit before he shrugged and went outside. Then his singing can be heard from inside the house " _ **Ohh~~~ I love the nightlife, I gotta Boogeh', on the Disco 'round awww yeahhh~~~~"**_

Then his voice goes " **Heeyy~~~ Neighbor, nice night to water the dirt on my front yard eh?"** before a woman scream can be heard after he said so.

…

 _Much later that night…_

As Bell was sleeping in his bed, Hestia slowly creep up behind him and slowly turns the young man over. Luckily he wasn't wearing his shirt so it makes whatever she was doing much easier.

The little Goddess wave her hands over the hieroglyphs on Bell's back and starts reading a bit before her face went pale.

She then whispered to herself "Th-this can't be… STR 221… DEF 111, WPN 232, DEX 313?... Ho-how could he…? This is definitely not a Lv. 1 stats… How did he getting so strong?"

Hestia then continue reading before she startled as she reaches the Skill part, which reads

 _Skill_

 _Relize Freze_

 _[single-minded pursuit]_

- **Accelerate growth**

 **-The effects last as long as**

 **his feelings are unchanged**

- **The effect are determined by the**

 **Strenght of his feelings.**

The petite Goddess said to herself once more "Th-This is no ordinary skill… He's advancing too fast and aggressive… most adventurers with this kind of stats would have be at Lv.2 by now… He raised his stats far passed every Lv.1 adventurers in just a couple of days…"

Hestia suddenly lift her face up as she realizes "It must be because… of that Wallen woman…"

She then look back at Bell, who was still sleeping and said "…He've determined to be as strong as her out of jealousy… that I can understand… thus rewarding him with this rare skill… That being said… I can't let anyone,not even him know of this … All the other gods will starts preying on him, and try to get him to join their familia… at all cost… especially Loki, that flat chested bitch…"

Hestia then look at Wade, who was sleeping with his mask, his boxers and a pair of white socks on, right next to Logan. In fact, he's hugging Logan as he snores.

She then said "And then there are these two… well, it's a fact that they're not from this… world… but, the talkative one… his incredible healing abilities could also be a Gods magnet… 'less they can endure his constant yapping… but… I gotta say, he is kinda funny…"

Hestia then look back at Bell for a bit before she slowly turn him over and lay down next to him, her face was all red as she slowly wraps her hands around the young man as she drool while thinking to herself "Eeekkkkk, This is awesomeee~~~~~When else can I get another chance like this?" before she slowly feel asleep aswell.

…

 _The next Morning…_

"YAAAAHHHHHHH!" Screamed Bell as he turn to his right side of the bed to see Wade, who was hugging him as if he was the merc's Teddy bear, instead of Hestia,whom he didn't even know sleeping with him last night.

As Bell jumps out of the bed, Wade got up aswell. The merc stretches as he cooed " **Guuddddd~~~~ morning beautiful…"** in a playful tone.

While being a joke, Bell nonetheless ran out to the living room to find Hestia and Logan was talking about some random things, seems like she was interested in Logan and Wade's world aswell.

The two look at Bell, with his face tinted red and started laughing. This is the first time Bell hear Logan's laugh, it's both scary, kind of hot and creepy at the same time.

Hestia grinned at Bell "Logan taught me how to "prank"… it's a way for people in his world find entertainments… so far he was right… we carried him and put on your bed and wait to see how you'd reacted…"

Bell still couldn't say a thing before he saw Wade walking out from his bedroom while he slapped the young man's butt playfully, causing Bell to jumped before he said " **For the record, I knew what you were gonna do… I just play along and pretend to be sleeping… Oh and eh… that fart machine gun wasn't part of my act…"**

This doesn't seems to surprise either Hestia nor Logan.

The merc then casually open his bag, rummage through it for a short while before he pulls out his X-force costume, which have the same design and pattern as his usual costume, save for the color schemes, this uniform was Grey and black instead of red and black, in addition the contact lense on the mask was red instead of white.

Wade whistled a tune from the "Pretty woman" song as he nochalantly putting on the outfit right in front of Logan, Bell and Hestia.

Bell then said to Logan "I gotta say, whoever make those outfits is a skilled craftman…"

Wade said as he putting on his mask " **Oh I'm telling you, it's breezy, comfortable, feel extra sensual~~~~ on my skins… Anddd~~~ it brings out my butts, it's a piece of art alright…"**

Logan then stood up and said "Just hurry up and let's go Wade, it's our first day at work remember?"

This seems to surprised Wade as he said " **Logan… what the heck've got into you? First, you pissed off at that talking Pokemon for pissing on little Bell… and now you're rushing me, TO GO TO WORK? WITH YOU? Are you sure those times being suffocating in that Adamantium ice cream didn't force your brain to starts working normally again?"**

Without saying a word, Logan grab Wade by the back of his suit and drag him away. But not before Wade said to Hestia " **If you're bored, there's some comics and a walkman in my bag…"** as he being dragged away.

Hestia tilted her head "Comic books?"

Wade said **"Well, you could say it's… my world's "records" of our eh… top "Adventurers"… there're mines too… Hope you're not too squeamish.. it comes with pictures presentations"** before he and Logan completely out of sight and earshot.

That leaves only Bell and Hestia alone, the two just awkwardly stares at each other for a full minute before Hestia then said "Hey eh Bell… I need to tell you something.."

The young man then sat down next to her and said "Ye-yes?"

Hestia took a deep breath and said "Listen… Your skill have been on a growth spurt lately… I mean… your stats have jumped far beyond any Lv. 1 adventurers… that worries me…"

Bell then said "Is there something wrong with it?"

Hestia shook her head "N-no, it mean that you have talents and potentials… but the stats skyrocketing means that you might have push yourself too hard…"

She paused for a moment and look at him before she said "…I don't want you to die Ok? What would I do without you?"

Bell quickly put his hands on her shoulders and said "Listen Hestia, I promised you that I would never abandon you…and I'm not planning on breaking that promise…"

Hestia smiled "Wow… That…'s pretty corny but… good enough for me" as she slightly blushes.

The petite Goddess then looks at Wade's bag and said "Sooo eh… I have an invitation to a party at Ganesha's place tonight… and eh… I don't have anything to do until then… Wanna check out his stuffs? He did say we could"

…

 _At The Mistress Of Abundant… later that day…_

"Well I'll be damn Wilson… how'd a…eh… guy like yourself, have such a angelic daughter like Eleanor?" Said Mia as she, Seal and the other girls in the pub was looking at his collection of photos that he and Eleanor took together.

Needless to say, some girls still doubt as they occasionally glances at Wade with a suspiscious look in their eyes.

Wade and Logan on the other hands was serving the trays to the customers. Thanks to Logan's rugged and sexy appearance, he managed to attracts even more customers, female obviously, while Wade's actions last night got people to stay away from him, thus he have to work as a janitor, which the merc seems to be enjoy doing as he casually sweeping around the joint.

After hearing Mia's question, Wade then said " **Long story boss… that being said… I hope she's ok over there…"**

…

 _New York City… AIM research facility…_

"Ok… this is NOT what I exactly planned.." said Shiklah, the beautiful succubus queen, who is the beloved wife of Wade and step-mother to Eleanor Camacho as she blasting her way through a group of AIM agents, with Eleanor in one of her arm, the little girl doesn't seems to be scared much since this type of thing isn't too strange for her after her encounters with the ULTIMATUM.

Eleanor was also holding a glass container that holds a fragment of a purple crystal, exactly like the one that suck her dad and Logan inside a day ago.

Shiklah asked Ellie "How did you know your father, my husband was suck inside this thing again?"

Ellie then said "Well…"

…

 _New York city's street,one day ago…_

 **(Deadpool: Flashback-that-have-SOMETHING-to-do-with-the-plot time~~~~)**

Eleanor was walking home from school alone as she though to herself "Hmmm… I wonder what would Dad want for his birthday tomorrow…?"

Suddenly she saw a bunch of people running away from something, then she heard a lot of gunshots, screams of pain and her dad's all too familiar voice that goes " **I know you shot me by mistake Frank! And I forgive you!"**

The little girl then cautiously peek around the corner to see her dad and Wolverine slaughter a bunch of AIM agents. The little girl said in awe "woahhh, kinda gross… but awesomee~~~"

She then saw a glass container with a purple crystal fragment inside lying on the street, until an AIM agent snuck past Wade and Logan and pick it up and make a run for it. Needless to say what happens next. Eleanor witness her dad threw Wolverine inside and jump in himself.

She's quite calm for a girl at her age, epspecially in such situation. Ellie then said "That can't be good…I gotta call step-mom…she'll know what to do…"

…

Shiklah was sitting on her throne,looking quite bored inside her palace, which reside in Monster Metropolis, where she reign as the supreme ruler.

The underworld's queen sighs "2 weeks straights, no calls, no nothin', what do that idiot take me for? A-a… a mindless, unfeeling trophy that he can just.. put around the house? I swear If I EVER get my hands on hi…"

She was stopped by the sounds of her ringing phone, which is the theme music from Star Wars. The queen picks it up and said "This is Shiklah… Oh, it's you my step-daughter, how's my hus…Ok?... Uh-huh? Uh-huh…? Well you know what hes like… wait… He WHAT? No, no time, I'm coming over!"

…

 **(Deadpool: Seriously, That's my little girl!"**

…

Back to the present, Shiklah have just sucked out an AIM agent's life force before she said to Eleanor "You know, you don't really have to tell me that last part…"

Ellie said "Uhhh…step-mom, should we worry about that scary..floating head guy?"

Shiklah turned to see MODOK, who seems to be pretty angry as he said "That's far enough you foul underworld fiend…"

Shiklah then pointed at him and said "Heyyy~~~ my husband talks about you before, MODICK… isn't it? Or was it NODICK? ODOCK? KODAK?"

That obviously got him mad as the giant headed man snarled "Grrrrr… It's MODOK woman, K! And your HUSBAND~~~ was just happen to be interfering with my plan… The fragment that the little Girll~~~ was holding there is compressed dark matters, combined with…"

His monologue was cut off by Shiklah "Woah, I am not a nerd so don't bother explaining… all I need to know is that will this thing take me to the same dimension that my husband was sucked into?"

MODOK then said "Well, if you MUST know, my early calculations and tests yeiled many… amazing results… see, the theory about mulitple universes are no laughing matters, Now consider the complex structure of the dark matters substains, the consistency, not to mention the sophisticated nature of singularity… Once a black hole was form, it would act in similar manners as a wormhole, but as we all know wormholes are itself, very unstables as the flow is still rely on the concentration of Dark matters in its path, thus to battle this problem and stabilize it I…"

Shiklah suddenly shouted with her monster voice "YES OR NO?"

That scares the crap out of MODOK as he simply answered "Probably yes… but it could have been a no, or a probably no"

Shiklah shrugged and said "Good enough for me" before she grab the cotainer from Ellie and smash it on the ground.

In just moments, the crystal glow once again. But strangely this time, instead of creating a black hole like the last one did, it just suck Eleanor into the glowing light before shattering into dust. Leaving both MODOK and Shiklah awkwardly stares at each other.

MODOK then said "I… have to admit, my calculations have never gives me this possible outcome before"

Shiklah gritted her teeth and roared in anger as she turns into her monster form. From afar a large explosion from the AIM Facility can be seen, with Shiklah flew away from the scene, looking pissed off.

…

 _Orario, later that evening…_

"Wow… this… Punisher guy is really good… pretty brutal but… GOOD! It's both sad and amazing how the death of ones family could drove a man to take a path such as he did… Gotta give the ones who write…and draws these adventurers records credits… these arts are amazing… Wilson's world is truly something…kinda weird, but truly something… although, why call them 'comic books' ?" said Hestia as she flipping through the pages of one of the issues of The Punisher's comics, which is both odd yet hold no surpises when something like this would belong to Deadpool himself.

Hestia then stops in front of a large restaurant shaped just like Ganesha, the Hindu God and sighs "Well…I guess we don't need a sign to know it's his place huh?" before she put the comic book into her bag and went in.

…

Inside the overly luxurious banquet hall, Ganesha, who seems to be a man, with an ancient India oriented outfit and a Elephant mask on stood on the stage and proudly declared "Welcome and Thank you for coming everyone! I am Ganesha, host to tonight's "Banquet of the Gods … And I am please to say that I am Moved by the numbers of guests every years… Anyway, the Familia Festival of this year is coming up, in just 3 Days left! And I-"

Hestia decided to ignore his speech as she zoom toward the tables and starts noming on the food and stores them in her bag as she said "Ohhh man~~~, this is delicious… Bell is going to love them"

As she does so, she can hear many other gods makes fun of her status, which started to annoys her, but Hestia decided to keep it cool and continue eating. Just then she heard a voice from behind "Hestia… long time no see"

Hestia turned to see another goddess, taller than her, long wavy hair with an eyepatch. The one eyed goddess wore a elegant ball gown, with the lower part made to look like a rose, in addition there was also a decorative black rose made from silk on the shoulder of the dress.

Hestia seems to recognize her as she said "Hephaestus"

The goddess, which turns out to be Hephaestus said "Glad to see you still well…and alive Hestia… by the way, the answer is no, I won't lend you any Barisu this time…"

Hestia seems upset as she said "Woah, rude much? Listen Hep, I am not the same goddess that leeching off of my friend"

Hephaestus sighs "Can't take any chances here Hestia…we're… still friends… it's just that I don't trust you with my money… and my food, you did swallowed a lot from the Banquet tonight"

Hestia jumped "Oh no no no no, I just keep the leftovers, I mean, it would be a waste to left these delicious grub to go to waste right?"

Suddenly, the two heard another voice from behind "I see you two are still chummy as ever"

They turned to see another goddess, the most beautiful goddess anyone have ever seen. She have long, silky, silver hair with two decorative black flower pins on both sides and a pair of shiny silver eyes. She wore a long, white silk dress that exposed most of her chest, being made in a ancient Norse royal gown design, with a golden belt as an addition, along with a pair of black leather gloves.

Hestia and Hephaestus both said "Fre-Freya.. Goddess of Beauty"

Seeing Hestia backing away from her, Freya asked "Am I a bother to you Hestia?"

Hestia pouted as she said "Not..really, I just don't feel comfortable being around you…"

Freya giggled "But, that's what I really like about you Hestia"

Suddenly, they heard yet another voice "Oi, Phae! Freya! Little brat"

Hestia seems to recognize the voice as she grunted "Speaking of which… here comes someone I hate far, far more than you"

The three turned to see the same flat chested goddess with the fox like eyes from the pub the night earlier. She have her hair tied up into a rollcake bun and wear a long dress, with not much distinguise feature beside the fact that it doesn't help her chest look any bigger.

Hestia tries her best to lift both sides of her lips up and gave a toothy smile as she said "Lo-Loki… How nice to-to see…You" with a rage filled,yet happy tone.

The flat-chested goddess, who turned out to be Loki scoffed "And what does a party pooper like you doing here, Hestia?"

Hestia still keep up her smile as she said nothing in return.

Hephaestus then said to Loki "It's been a while Loki, boy the things we've heard about your Familia's reputations lately, it's incredible"

Loki snorts as she said "I know I know, I myself have always been proud of my childrens"

Hestia then remembers something as she asked Loki "Ey, Is that.. famous Wallen princess of sword or..whatever going out with anyone?"

Loki suddenly smirked as she said "Hello, did you ever read the news? She was taken by me"

Hestia replied "I felt sorry for her…but not that much"

Loki then lean closer to Hestia as she lower the pitch of her voice "If you planning on trying to get her to change team…don't bother, I can, and I will tear apart whoever who try to take Wallen from my Familia"

Hestia gritted her teeth, obviously irritated by Loki's arrogant. But her angry face suddenly switch to a surprised face as she saw Wade, still in his X Force uniform and fully armed, leaning over Loki's shoulder as he said " **Sheesh, what's with the Kanye West-bitchy attitute…Loki, wasn't it? Pffft, you know where I'm from we have a Loki, God of Mischief too,but he's much more lovable compare to you… fox face…"**

Loki obviously recognize Wade as she back away from the guy,who just kept advancing toward her as he said " **And I gotta ask ya, how in the name of Brock Harrison do you see with those…those…eyes? .. I mean I'm not being racist or anything but God damn, do you see with faith or-or-or with whatever the type of shit Daredevil do or something? Do-do you ever have to Open your eyes? Like.. EVER? Or do you only open them when you're about to give someone an ass-whooping?"**

Loki still couldn't say anything in returns while Wade continue his yapping " **And eh, why would you dress like a girl? I mean not that I think you look ugly in a ball gown or anything, you look incredibly fuckable in it Imma tell you that… But you should try to dress your gender, I would still want to see you in bed with a tuxedo on… Hey, Genders… or species is no problem for me kiddo"**

Loki is seriously insulted by his jabs that disguises as curious questions, as she trembles and run away shouting as she cries comically "Yo-YOU!.. I've have enough of YOU~~~! WAHHHHH!"

Haphaestus sighs "As expected…Loki lost…again to…Hestia… but not in a way we expected… Loki've really gone soft though"

The two goddesses then look at Wade, with Haphaestus says "Hey… I've heard some adventurers talks about you…"

Wade then asked " **Did they said anything about my butt?"**

Haphaestus sighs "Sadly… no, but I gotta say, you do have a cute butt.."

Hestia then turns to Wade and asked "Deadpool? What the heck are you doing here?"

Wade then said " **Oh I snuck out of work, Logan's pretty popular there by the way…all the ladiess~~~~ couldn't keep their panties on whenever they see him… So, I was walking around.. unintentionally scaring a couple of people on the way, til' I saw you, walking into an brick Elephant's vagina, reading Punisher's comi..I meannn 'Recordss' … so I followed you in"**

Freya look at Wade for a bit before she said "And who is this…fellow in the rather, interesting outfit?"

Hestia then said "Hey, keep your hands of him Freya, he's my friend…technically anyone who can piss off Loki is my friend… and He's not from around here" as she grab Wade's arm.

Wade nonetheless introduced himself " **Names Wade, Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool, and which Goddess of Beauty are you?"**

Freya seems impressed as she said "Freya, mister Pool, may I ask how did you know I'm a Goddess of Beauty if you're not from…around here?"

Wade shrugged as he said " **No biggie, where I came from, every single Goddesses of beauty and love dressed like and ACTED like sluts,well to be honest even the female heroes where I came from also dressed like hookers, so it's pretty easy to spot one..."**

Freya seems to be amused by Wade's comment as she said "You're a bold one…I like that"

Wade then sighs " **Still… I need to find a away to get to Eleanor… I gotta tell her what I want for my birthday… which is today… but it's not like she'll just gonna pop out from right above me in some freakky purple portal, landed safely on my arms, agaisnt all logical senses and everything that could make a good story development…"**

The moment he said so, a purple portal just pop open, startled every gods and goddesses in the banquet hall. And in just intant, Eleanor fell right out from it and landed safely on Wade's arms, agaisnt all logical senses and everything that could make a good story development.

Eleanor grinned as he hugged Wade "DAD!"

Wade quickly hug her back tightly, before he look up to the ceiling and whispered " **God, I took back every bad thing I've ever said about you… except for that Abel and Cain gig that you pulled.. Dude that was MESSED UP"**

Wade then kiss Eleanor on the cheek from under his mask and said **"Aw honey, how'd you it was my birthday? This is the best gift ever"**

Hestia squeeled "Awwww that's so cute" as she watches Wade and Ellie being all cuddly wuddly.

Eleanor was both glad yet somehow worried at the same time as she said "Uhh dad..I hate to ruin the mood but I was chased by a monster when I flew through that weird space-ish tunnel and…it's closing in"

Wade then put Eleanor down and said to Hestia **"Take her home… don't worry honey… Daddy's working"**

Hestia nodded as she grab Eleanor's hand and head for the exit. However, a series of gigantic greenish tentacles emerged from the portal,swung around viciously and smash the wall above the entrance,blocking Eleanor and Hestia's exit, then the rest of the monster emerges.

It was a combination between a worm, an octopus and a dragon. With the dragon head, a worm's body and the octopus tentacles on its back.

It looked around at all the possible preys within the banquet hall before it gave out a roar.

Wade then look at Hestia and Eleanor before he draws his AA-12 and said " **Oh, no wormhole hitchiking** **japanese fetishes monster is going to touch my daughter and ruin MY birthday!"** Before he pointed the handheld meat shredder and hold down the trigger.

Once again, the repeating earth shattering gunshots from the AA-12 barrel echoes through the banquet hall and tore through the monster's flesh.

The Gods and Goddess froze in shock as they look at the man in front of them, but more at his strange, powerful weapon in his hands.

Wade stop firing to dodge a tentacle swing from the monster before he continue firing, and tore off one of the tentacles thanks to the sheer power of the 12 Gauge shells. The merc said with bliss in his tone " **Man,This infinite ammo 8-bit games and Rambo franchise logic is really awesome… I mean, I fired this thing like… more than 60 times with a 32 shells mag already and it still haven't ran out of ammo…"**

As he said so, a tentacle managed to creep up behind him. It suddenly became a solid form and impale Wade through the chest before lifting him up in the air.

Everyone was disgusted as they saw Wade's coolant being exposed and dangling on the tentacle. Freya just said quietly "Oh dear me"

Ellie screamed "DAD!"

Wade on the other hand said " **Hey~~~ that coolant just regenrated 5 days ago! And by the way, if You feel that you Absolutely, Positively MUST have your way with me, my ass is DOWN HERE! Sheesh! Don't your wife let yer have some at home or what?"**

The monster seems to understand Wade's crack as it roared at his face, splattering its green,gooey saliva all over his uniform.

The merc then shrugged as he raised the full auto shotgun and open fire while still being impaled and is being up in mid-air.

The buckshots tore the monster's mouth apart, Causing great pain to it, but not enough to force it to let go of him.

The monster instead bring Wade closer to its mouth attempting to eat him alive. Knowing this, Wade threw his AA-12 on the ground near Hestia and Eleanor before he draws his Katanas and said " **Oh yea… this is gonna be like Dead man's chest… except YOU are gonna go to Davy Jones's Locker… as a cripsy deep fried Calamari dish!"**

With that, the monster swallowed Wade whole, causing Hestia to held on tightly to Eleanor and filled the room with with silent. But it wasn't long before Wade's voice can be heard from inside the monster's belly " **Okkkieeee~~~~ This is taking longer than I though… and his digestive acid is prettyyy~~~~ powerful… Mmm taste like lemonade too… Eyyy I can see my ribcages…oOooooo~~~ so that's what my cancer tumor looks like, gosh it looks like Jocelyn Wildenstein's face… with… wrinkles…Ughhh"**

What he said sent chill down everyone's spine. Hestia was try to think of a way to save Wade until she saw the AA-12 that he uses on the ground. The little goddess then rushed toward the gun and picks it up and hold it the same way Wade did and aims at the monster then hold down the trigger.

The rain of buck shots once again does further damages to the monster, causing it to growl in pain. Hestia was both surprised by the recoil force but thanks to the gun's advance recoil reduction system,which Hestia obviously have no knowledge off, the repeating shots doesn't shaken her aim much.

The little goddess kept her trigger finger down and tore the rest of the tentacles apart as she said "Wow… This thing is awesome, it's like holding a little dragon in my hand"

The pain kept the monster at bay, and after each shot, its body was damages more serverly, rendering it weaker and weaker. The gods could have just use their magic to help, but seeing the power of the weapon on Hestia's hands they just stood by and watch in awe.

Hestia finally stop firing when her arms were too sore to keep up. The Banquet hall was littered with chunks of the monsters meat and blood, and the beast weakly growl as its struggles to advance toward Hestia.

Suddenly, two katana blade pierce through the monster's stomach and slice it open. Then within a second, Wade jump out from it and safely landed on the ground right in front of Hestia and Eleanor.

The monster finally succumb to the wounds and fell limp on the floor, after it gave out one last growl.

The gods and goddesses are horrified as they look at Wade's current appearance. His body was serverly disgested by the acid, true to his words, his ribcages can be seen clearly, his uniform was tattered, half of his face were burned off by the acid right down to his skull.

Hestia covered her mouth with one hand while holding on to the AA-12 as she saw Wade's horrid damaged body.

Wade then laughed as he said to everyone " **Heheheheh.. betcha even Paris Hilton would be jealous of my body right now"**

As Wade said so, everyone, except Hestia and Eleanor widened their eyes as they saw Wade's skin tissues and body began to reform, reconnect and soon, in just 2 minutes, it have completely healed.

Freya and Loki was the most impressed, with Freya said "This outlandish fellow possess some truly remarkable abilities…"

While Loki then said "I gotta have him… I won't let that little brat get her hand on such a exotic living treasure…"

Hestia sighes as she gave Wade his shotgun back and said "Does things like this hurt you?" as she wave her hand over his tattered outfit, and in an instant, his X force outfit was fully repaired to mint condition.

Wade looks really impressed with the result as he said " **Can you do that with my skin?"**

Hestia sighs "Sadly, no… your.. condition is.. far beyond even my godly abilities…"

Wade then teased her " **Well then you're not much of a goddess aren't ya?"**

Hestia pouted as she said "Well this "not-so-much-of a Goddess " just saved your life"

Wade then hugged Eleanor as he replied " **In case you didn't noticed, I can't die… Hello, didn't you see half of my skull was exposed earlier? Normally when someone's skull is exposed,it means that they're already fucking dead… and I'm the only who walks around looking like one of those modern french…anorexia supermodel, you might not know what's all these Anorexia model thingie is but just imagine a skeleton, wrapped with nothing but one layer of sandpaper then yo-you-you OH the POINT IS, I didn't need your help…. But…thanks!"**

Eleanor smiled at Hestia and said "He's thanking you miss Hestia"

Hestia was pretty flattered as she said "Well..if you…if you put it that way…No problem"

Wade then asked Eleanor " **By the way, did your step-mom asked about me? I told her I was going out to get some milk at the mall… but that was more than a week ago…"**

…

End of chapter 3


	4. Silverback-attack

_Chapter 4: Silverback-attack_

 **(Deadpool: Ok, Seriously? That is the best fucking title you can come up with?)**

 _Orario, later that night… back at Bell and Hestia's house_

"I can't believe I'm saying this but…you Really ARE Wade's daughter…not that it's a bad thing but… you know…" said Logan after he found out Eleanor have been transported to Orario.

Eleanor smiled at him "It's ok mister Wolverine, mrs Preston said I'm pretty calm in situation when most people would panic too"

Hestia was still shocked as she awardly looks at Eleanor, whose appearance does not have any resemblance to her alleged biological father as she said "Wow… I mean… Is he really your dad Ellie? I mean, you look like…a little angel while he looked like a-a…"

Eleanor said "I get that a lot, but if anyone say anything bad about me, daddy always tell me to closed my eyes and cover my ears"

The little girl then leaned next to Bell and said "He don't want me to see him punch anyone in the nose until I'm old enough"

Before Bell or anyone can say anything, they saw Wade coming out of the bathroom, he leaned against the doorway and said " **Ok, don't nobody uses the bathroom in the next … 30 minutes, It's like the aftermatch of a Woodstock concert or some shit… Oooowee I'm telling you, Mia's special Onion Chilly and that…grilled spleen… thingy is the definition of Bio-Terrorism… next to that** _ **Necro-smella-Nacho-La-Bigga-Bomba-A la Deadpoulet**_ **that I whipped up last year to smoke those AIM dummies out of their caves labs in Cairo... man you guys should have smells it…"**

As everyone awkwardly stares at Wade, Bell hold out a capsule shaped glass container filled with a pitch black substain and asked "Uh.. mister Wilson, I found this in your bag…what is it?"

Wade grab the container from him and said " **This, kiddo, is a special guest… well..you won't see what this thing can do often unless the blokes who reads this story wants it to become a recurring character…"**

Wade then turns toward the reader and said " **That's right, if any of you wants to see this little space slime suit that I eh… borrowed from Thompson…in action, just tell the prick who's writing this Twilight-quality story in his stinking review mailbox…"**

Bell then asked awkwardly "Uhhhh, who are you talking to?"

Eleanor then said "My dad does that a lot, he says I'm too young to understand"

Hestia doesn't seems to be surprised but she did seems to be weird out by his behaviors as she said "I…see…"

And thus, the night passes with an awkward atmospshere.

 _The next day…_

At a very fancy but quiet restaurant, a cloaked person walks through the front door and toward a table next to the window, which provide full view of the city streets below.

There was another person who was sitting at the table, which turns out to be Loki,accompanied by The Sword Princess, Wallenstein, Loki's pride and joy.

Loki look at the cloaked person and smirked "What's with the cloak?"

The person smiled and lower the hood of the cloak. It was Freya, the Goddess of Beauty. She sat down in the oppsite chair as she said "Well can't a Goddess have some… sense of fashion of her own?"

Loki then stood up and wraps her arm around Wallen's shoulder and said "This is the child in my Familia I've been telling you about, I'm telling you, I couldn't even take my eyes off of her for a second or she'll just ended up grinding monsters in the Dungeon to dust…."

Freya then smiled at Wallen,who was blushing as she gaze upon the Goddess's beauty and said "My my, how cute"

Freya then look at Loki and said "Oh, I heard that you drank yourself into a coma last night…"

Loki jumped as she said "Wha-How did you know you rotten slut?"

Freya smiled as she said "Well,one your children can be…quite loud…much like yourself, which reminds me, what did you wanted to see me about?"

Loki still keeps up her usual grin as she said "Oh you know, I just wanted to chat a bit"

Freya chuckled "You know, you were never much of a good liar", suddenly there's a dark, threatening aura emits from Freya, who still have a smile on her lips.

Loki then declared proudly "As I was saying, me and Aizu got this year's event… And hey, I gotta enjoy a lovey dovey date with my Aizu, ain't I?"

Freya scoffed without Loki noticing.

The flat chested goddess then said "… It's a man.. am I right?"

Freya tilted her head "Pardon?"

Loki's smile disappeared as she said "Don't play dumb with me… You suddenly show up at the banquet, plus, I know you have been spending a lot of times gathering information… what are you plotting THIS time?"

Freya then said "That made me sounds like villain you know?"

Loki quickly replied "Oh don't give me that… You've always lusted for men… and now you're after some kid from another Familia…again.." as she leaned agaisnt her chair.

Freya then smiled before she said "… and I've always got what I wanted…"

Loki frowned "You stupid Beauty Goddesses sluts… acting like you're constantly horny…24/7 … You'll fuck anything that moves would you?"

Freya giggled at Loki's jab "My, that hurts… At least I make distinction"

Loki replied "You can't fool me, you even flirts with male gods"

Freya shrugged "Well, having them under my thumbs does gives me… certain perks"

Loki then lean closer to Freya as she said "So… tell me..who is it this time? After what you put me through, I deserve to know"

Freya smiled "Well… he's not strong, unreliable, prone to getting hurt and cries easily… such a child he is…"

The Beauty Goddess then look out the window and said "But… he was so beautiful, so transparent… he have a.. different color, a color that I have never seen before… You know, the first time I saw him was from behind this very window… from this very restaurant, at this exact table…" as she blushes.

Freya suddenly saw something down on the street as she stood up and said "Excuse me Loki… but I have some important matter to attend to…" before she left.

Loki look on as she said "Geez…what's with her?"

She then look at Aizu,who was also looking out the window as she said "Oi, Aizu…what's wrong?"

…

 _Somewhere else in Orario…_

Inside of what seems to be a blacksmith shop. Hestia was waiting for something while she reads some more Punisher's comics, seems like the petite goddess really hooked up on Frank's life.

Then suddenly, Hephaestus walks toward Hestia, with a black onyx dagger on her hands.

Hephaestus then hand the dagger to Hestia, who gaze upon it with two bright eyes before she said "Here ya go… Thanks for the help by the way…"

Hestia rubs her cheek on the blade as she said "It's perfect Hephae! Ohhh Thank you, Thank you!"

Hephaestus seems flattered as she slightly blushes "It's ok… just.. eh.. I would appreciated it if you'll stop groveling on the ground and cry your eyes out and begs me to make him a weapon like you did last night…"

Hestia then fidgeting "… I..I just want to support him… He's risking his life so many times in the Dungeon to support my Familia… and all I've ever been is a burden to him…" as she hold the dagger close to her chest.

Hephaestus shook her head as she whispered "Geez… that child is freaking dense…"

Hestia then said "Ooo! Ooo! I gotta give it a name, how 'bout Love Dagger? It'll represent the love I have for Bell!"

Hephaestus quickly replied "I'll smash that dagger if you dare give it that cheap name Hestia…" as she hold up the hammer with a menacing look on her face.

Hephaestus then said "So… eh… what's that?" as she pointed at the comics that Hestia was holding in her other hand.

Hestia then put the dagger in her bag and show Hephaestus the stack of Punisher's comics and said "Oh this? Wilson said it's his world's "adventurers personal records" Oh I'm telling you, it's much more lively than Orario's texts records… you should check this guy out, he's a vigilante…"

Hephaestus reluctantly took the comics and said "Okkk… but I'm not giving you these back until you paid me the loan"

Hestia nodded as she dashes out, saying "Fair enough, I'll see ya later Hephea! Thank you again"

Hephaestus waves at Hestia before she sighs "Yep… that child she loves so much… ain't gonna notice without some excessive method…"

She then look at the comics Hestia gave her for a bit and said "Well… let see what kind of adventurers this Deadpool guy's world have to offer…"

…

 _Meanwhile… At Mia's place…_

" **Nobody calls my daughter a little money maker… unless you mean it as "** _ **Your daughter will grow up to be a successful, highly respected businesswoman**_ **" which is highly unlikely the case here, with all those sweats and heavy breathing when you look at her…you know what I mean, eh .… I'll just call you Fredo..since I shot you in the side of your head and everything…"** Said Wade after he shot a man in his head with his Deagle.

Mia sighs as she said "Oh geez Wilson… Listen, you need to learn to keep your temper in check in the future... he might be a sleazy sicko, but he does not deserve to be killed for trying to prey on Ellie… He does deserve a good beating, but not… this…not here at least… you're scaring away the customers.."

Wade holstered his pistol as he helps Logan carrying the body out " **Can't take any chances boss, who knows? The fat bastard might aswell be a fugitive pedophile/homicidal maniac with drinking and bladder problem, New York Hobos's signature body odor, who targets young, unsuspecting children with candies… probably the same candies that make his ass looks like The Blob…I mean… his ass is still jiggling,look…Anyway, why can't we just kill obvious criminals instead of doing that '** _ **Innocent until proven guilty'**_ **crap** _ **…**_ **I'm telling ya, it's like finding 'physical evidences' to prove that a motherfucker with a knife, who was stabbing a person is doing it WITH murder intent and not 'accicentally' …** **"**

Mia, who was covering Ellie's ears and eyes awkwardly look at Logan and said "Pretty messed up world you two came from heh?"

Logan scoffed "You have no idea lady…"

Mia sighs as she help cleans the blood of the floor "Look, why don't you two take a day off today? With payment of course… Take your little girl around the city, they're holding another Monster Feriae this year… today aswell"

Logan put his mask back on as he said "Pardon?"

Mia said "It's a big event that being held every year, where they capture monsters from different level of the Dungeon, brought to the city coloseum and let various group of adventurers attempt to tame the beasts… "

Wade shrugged as he said " **Oh you mean the Circus! Yea me and Ellie goes to those things a lot, I can understand why those bears, tigers and lions always maul us on sight, Hey if anyone who was wearing a glitter thong put a chained collar on my neck and whip me every five seconds, I'd probably maul them to pieces too… Sure boss, I'll check it out later… C'mon honey"** before walking out with Eleanor.

Logan quickly followed them, leaving Mia and Seal taking care of the pub.

…

 _Somewhere else in Orario…_

"Now where could he have gone to?" said Hestia as she walking through the alleyways, with the dagger wrapped with silk cloth inside her bag.

Suddenly she heard Freya's voice behind her "Oh my, fancy meeting you hear Hestia"

Hestia swung around to see Freya, with her cloak fully covered her body before she said "OH uh… Freya, w-why are you here?"

Freya smiled "Oh I can't be see walking among a large crowd… why are you wandering among these…alleyways ?"

Hestia scratches the back of her head and said "Oh, I was taking a shortcut, you know, with all the crowds outside gathering to watch the Monster Fariae… that reminds me, did you happen to see a child in my Familia? He's a young boy, white hair, red eyes… kinda like a rabbit, did you see him?"

Freya's eyes widened slightly as she heard the descriptions, it was the same young man she was interested in, it was Bell Kranel, Hestia Familia's only member.

The goddess of beauty look at Hestia for a moment before she said "I…think I saw someone fit your descriptions near the coloseum…"

Hestia bowed and said "Thank you, Thank you so much" before dashing off, leaving Freya who look on as she smiled "So he's with her.. How convenient…"

…

 _Meanwhile,near the Coloseum…_

"Why are we spying those two again **?"** Asked Logan as he,Eleanor and Wade peeking out from behind a wall, looking at Bell and Hestia as they goes on a date. The trio spotted them walking away from a ice cream stand and Wade just decided to follow them.

Wade was eating an ice cream cone as he said " **Why not?"**

Logan doesn't seem to be surprise at Wade's answer as he sighs. The mutant then noticed the Symbiote container in Wade's satchel. This certainly worries him as the guy asked "Wade… why the heck are you bringing this…thing along?"

Wade swallowed the rest of his treat, pull his mask back down and said nonchalantly " **Plot development… I think the douce who wrote this shit ran out of explaination about how did I just brought a potentially dangerous space slime that can suck you dry, in return for super strenght and a cool,ridiculously comfortable slime suit…"**

Once again, Logan have no idea what Wade've just said, the guy just shook his head and said "You know… I don't care anymore, just get that thing far away from your daughter you hear? I don't want her to look when I have to chop yer' symbiote filled head off bub…"

Wade pat Logan on the shoulder as he said " **Oh c'mon Wolvie, have I ever messed anything up with the little slime ball?"**

…

 **(Deadpool: Oh Goody, another flashback!)**

The scene then switch to a burning cityscape, people running around, screaming frantically as they being chased by a bunch of Symbiote Guinea Pigs. Among the chaos, Wade was standing there, awkardly look around, not to mention the fact that he is also wearing the Symbiote suit, this one assimulate his red and black outfit, with two black rosarch-like eyes and the Symbiote's signature long, wiggling tounge and its elastic jaw, filled with sharp teeth of all length and sizes. Wade's body and muscle mass have also increases, but not as big as the original Venom.

Alongside Wade was Cyclops from the X-men, who was facepalming himself as he said " God dammit what did you do… this time Wade?"

Wade shrugged and spoke in a much deeper and more raspy version of his voice,caused by the Symbiote " **We…eh… slipped… Look on the bright side, they're Guinea Pigs… what 'severe catastrophic damage' can they caused?"**

As Deadpool, or now known as Venompool said so, both him and Cyclops saw a large building explodes before collapsing to the ground.

Once the dust wave cleared, Venompool shrugged " **Could have been some dumbass with a cigarette near a leaked gas valve…"**

He then look at Cyclops,who is staring at him with his visor glowing red before he quickly replied " **OK OK! We'll round 'em up…sheesh…"**

…

The scene quickly switch back to present time, Wade didn't even noticed that Hestia and Bell have noticed them and is now chatting with Logan and Ellie,while the merc was still lost in his own flashback.

Bell then look at Wilson and said "Mister Wilson, we're going to see the Monster Fariea, would you like to come with us?"

Wade didn't even think twice before he shrugged " **Sure why not?"**

But as he was about to depart with the others, he heard a familiar voice from behind "Well well well, we meet again, Pool"

Wade seems to be smiling under his mask as he turned to see Loki, Aizu and Bate,who obviously still mad at Wade for calling him a dog.

The merc then said " **Well well well, if it isn't little flat-chested goddess,the I'm-obsess-with-grinding-the-Dungeon princess, and the little drunken dog… here for the Monster Circus?"**

Bate instantly snarled at Wade "You want to die that bad you weakling?"

Wade wasn't even remotely intimidated as he smirk and said " **Aw did I hurt your widdle fweeling ya mutt? Well you should though about THAT before you went Ides of March on my little buddy's feeling…"**

Wade then said to Eleanor **"Honey, cover your ears, if he doesn't shut up in the next 5 minutes, cover your eyes"**

Wade then look back at Loki and said " **Hey seriously, didn't I tell you people to keep that furball under control? I am trying to have a civilized conversation here I have you know…"**

The flat-chested goddess then glare at Bate and said calmly "Bate… could you do me a favor…and be quiet for just 5 minutes?"

Loki then look at Hestia,who was giving her the death stare then back to Wade and said "Since we're in a hurry, I'll get to the point… I want YOU, Deadpool"

Wade quickly replied " **Hey,** **I want you too… but I'd prefer that the two of us to take it slow~~~ you know, a couple dates before you and me can get… physical"**

Loki scoffed as she said "No you blabbering idiot, I mean I want you… in my Familia, think about it…" before she left with Aizu,who briefly smiled at Bell and Bate,who still gritted his fangs at Wade after his insult.

The merc then said loudly as Loki walks away " **It's still gonna end with you and me in bed right?"** Before he laughed out loud.

Wade then turns to Hestia and said " **God I wanna kill that furry punk so bad! …No offense yer Grace"**

Logan scoffed when he heard Wade's statement

Hestia then said "Guys, just let it go ok? People like Bate is pretty common around here…it's just that he's near the top of the food chain so, nobody've been able to teach him a lesson in humility…yet"

Before anyone can say anything, they saw a couple of Adventurers and Eina walks by, looking very worried as they talked about something. Eina quickly notices Bell and run towards him and the others.

She didn't even wait for anyone to greet or speak as she quickly said "Listen to me Bell, you guys have to go home… we've got an emergency… Ho-How did your daughter get here?"

Wade shrugged " **Oh you know, typical poorly explained plotlines"**

Eina stares at Wade after she heard his cryptid answer for a moment before she said "…Anyway, we've discovered many of the guards who was suppose to look after the monsters cages were all unconcious…well, unconcious is not really the right word… They…it's like… they just got the ejaculation of a lifetime..putting them into a unconcious-like state… We don't know who,or what did it but that's not important, thing is every single Silverback cages have been opened… We're gathering all the help we can get to either re-capture them,or terminate them… I've issued a warning to the citizens, you guys could either help or find a safe place to hide in until it's over…"

Wade quickly grab Eleanor's hand,but before he can say anything, Logan quickly spoke "You,Hestia and Bell get Ellie back to his house… I'll take it from here"

Wade then blankly asked " **Ok now I'm really worried Wolvie… did that flight through the wormhole do something to your brain? You're so… heroic…and more responsible than usual"**

Logan cracks his neck "And I'm so gonna turn you into a Friday night kebab special if you don't hurry up…I can smell them coming already" as he took a long sniff of the air.

Eina then look at Wolverine before she said "Thank you, the other volunteers will give you a hand, you should meet up wit…"

Logan didn't say a word before his claws pop out from his fists, which startled Eina, who then said "…Or you could take your own route to attack, I need to find Aizu and Loki, did anyone see them?"

Wade, Eleanor and Bell quickly pointed at the direction that Loki and her Familia childs headed in unison. Eina nodded as she said "Thanks, you guys should hurry up" before she and the adventurers depart.

However, before Eina could get far, she heard a woman scream, followed by a fierce roar. Then a couple of creatures leaped out from various directions and landed right in the middle of the large, panicking crowd. They highly resembled an earth ancient primate,with gray-ish skin, muscular bodies and silver fur. Their eyes were blood red and their mouth filled with sharp fangs.

Some people in the crowd can be heard screaming "IT'S THE SILVERBACKS!"

Wade slowly reach for his Deagles and said **"Woah Hoah hoah, Gollum… you been working out bruh? And look~~~, You have kids, man I gotta say… I feel sorry for your wife… must have take like..eh… half an our to look 'IT' heh?"** before he draws both his Deagle and open fire on the creatures.

As Wade does so, Logan lunge at a nearby Silverback and stab it right in the chest repeatedly before he dodge an attack from another silverback and slice its throat open, leaving the beast slowly bleed to death, but not before it managed to swung its fists at Logan a couple more times before it fell limp on the ground.

Back to Wade, who've just filled a silverback full of holes switches to his Uzis and said to Bell " **Get your Goddess and Ellie home…"** before he spray both Uzis at a silverback that was closing in on a civillian. The other adventurers ave also joined the fight while Eina helps the citizens escape.

Bell nodded as he took out the dagger Hestia and Hephaestus made for him and dashes off, with Hestia riding on his back and Ellie in his arms,who was looking back at her dad dodging a series of attacks from the beasts as he's out of eye sight.

However, unknown to Bell, he was being watched. By none other than Freya, who was standing on top of a building, wearing a revealing long black dress with feathery collar and black gloves. Not only that, a silverback also seems to be following him by jumping from rooftop to rooftop.

As Bell reached a intersection with a sewer entrance, he, Ellie and Hestia heard a blood curdling roar not far from where they are.

Realizing what's going on, Bell said "No no no… one of them 's on to us…" before he look at the direction where the roar come from as he think " _At this rate…"_

Hestia slowly put her hand on his shoulder and said "Be-Bell?"

Without a word, Bell grab both Ellie and Hestia's arm,threw them into the sewer entrance and close it before they can react as he though to himself " _… I'll just need to make sure she and Ellie survives…"_.

Hestia grab the iron bars on the gate, shaking them violently as she shouted "BELL! WHA-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Bell look at Hestia for a moment before he smiled "I… I've lost every single person that I've called family to those monsters… my mother, my father, my grandfather… I couldn't do a damn thing to save any of them, I'm a worthless piece of shit… But not this time, not you, not Ellie, no more… I won't let any of you die…" before he ran off toward the roar's direction.

Hestia then shouted as she shook the iron bars harder "BELL YOU IDIOT! I WON'T ALLOW THIS YOU HEAR? I WON'T!"

…

As Bell got pretty far from where he hid Hestia and Ellie, the young man cautiously look around,as the beast may have already got it sight locked on him and is ready to pounce at any time, and from any directions.

He then look at the dagger that Hestia gave him and said "…Now that I think about it.. what's so special about this dagger anyway? It looks just like those standard issues combat daggers…but with, a fancy color coating is all…"

As he said so, Bell was struck by the silverback from behind, sending him flying into a nearby wall. The young man struggling to got back up while the beast gave out a roar and charge toward him with its corner swinging.

Bell quickly blocked the attack, but the impact still sent him right back into the wall he slammed into earlier.

His head was bleeding and hid body began to gave out, Bell couldn't even get up, he just lying there, helplessly look at the silverback raising both its fists high in the air, preparing to deliver the final blow.

At that moment, Bell can only think to himself " _I can't die like this… I can't abandon Hestia and Eleanor… Though, on the bright side… Aizu isn't here to see me in this humiliating moment… geez, I've only met that Wilson guy for a couple of days.. and his sense of humor already got a hold of me… heheheheh…"_

Just moment before the silverback can kill him, they both heard a voice shouting "BELLLL!"

Bell and the silverback turned to see Hestia,along with Eleanor was standing in front of them. The silverback look at the two easy prey for a moment before it charge toward the two.

But, before it can reach the girls, Bell,suddenly shot up and with lightning speed, he have reached the two before the monster, grab them both and dashes off, with the beast hot on their tail.

Up onto top of another building, Freya was still keeping her eyes on the actions, as she smiled "My my… that boy truly is remarkable"

…

Back to Wade and Logan, along with many more adventurers, were being surrounded and outnumbered by the silverbacks, they have already taken some casualties among the warriors.

Surprisingly, Aizu and Bate is also among the standing adventurers as they both calculate their next move.

The surrounding silverbacks suddenly stepped back and make way for what seems to be a alpha silverback. This one is remarkably larger than the rest, almost as big as King Kong.

The alpha step in front of the remaining adventurers and gave out a monstrous Roar that echoes through the whole town.

Wade,with his outfit partially destroyed said " **Sheesh… must be the wife"**

Logan spit out some blood and crack his neck as he said "And she'll be The Dead Wife in the next 1 minute"

Wade on the other hand whistle nonchalantly as he took out the Symbiote container and open the lid and said " **Welp, guess it's a good time for some bonding experiences…"**.

Logan knew it was a stupid idea, but it's too late to protest. He then shouted "EVERYONE GET AWAY FROM HIM!" before he whispered "Dammit Wade… you psycho"

Aizu, Bate, Logan and the other quickly does so while keeping their guard up in case the beta silverbacks decided to attacks.

Wade then took out all of his weapons and drop them on the ground before he pour the Symbiote on his head. In just second the Symbiote wrap itself around is body and start mimicking his outfit's color schemes but with a different pattern. It then increases his muscle mass and biomass. Wade seems to be quite used to the bonding procedure as he just tapping his foot casually and said " **Hey that tickles.."**

It wasn't long before his whole body was completely covered. To everyone's horror, the monstrous man in front of them open his wide, elastic jaw,filled with hellish fangs and a long,creepy, wiggling tounge with green saliva drooling down and gave out a horrifying roar that startled even the lesser silverbacks.

As the silent air enveloped the whole square, Venompool still stand there, motionless. There is a raspy voice started speaking inside his head " _OH Noooo… You AGAIN?"_

Then Wade's voice can be heard as it replied " **Ya missed me?"**

The raspy voice replied " _As much as we enjoy your unlimited supply of food… Your mind is the most disgusting thing we have ever bonded with…"_

Wade's voice scoffed " **Then you obviously haven't been with those Japanese artists who drew human and giant insects porn,you know I did use one of their 'works' to toture some guys for informations …"**

The raspy voice, which seems to be the Symbiote spoke " _Enough! You've made your point…Anyway… Do we… get to eat all of them?"_

Wade's voice replied " **Well, no, only the ones that looked like Omega Red's naked and hairy clones…"**

The Symbiote seems to be excited as it spoke " _Then lets not waste anymore time… ugh… what is wrong with us? We've never talked like this before…It's…It's so…civillized… it's sickening…Ugh… at least Carnage isn't here to see this humiliating display…"_

Wade's voice replied " **Yea… I can understand how you feel…"**

 **(Deadpool: To understand this, read the new Deadpool comics,from the All new All Different Marvel… Oh man, being popular, acting all civillized to keep your public image sure sucks)**

The Symbiote covered merc then began to spoke with a much deeper,and raspy version of his voice " _ **We are the terror from the far reaches of space… don't ask how far cause' to be honest we don't even really remember what miserible rock we crawl out from… We are what the idiots from some indigenous tribes called the beacon of hope… seriously, what's with them and worshiping the first thing that impressed them anyway? … We are the darkness INSIDE another darkness…which is pratically the same thing… We are the devour of ALL that have it coming… WE ARE A SUPER…"**_

His sentece was cut short when the alpha silverback unleash a rocket punch right at his face, launching him toward a nearby building. The guy smashes through a couple of walls before he landed. As the crowd akwardly look through the holes shaped like him. They can hear him saying "… ** _Heyyyy~~~ Nice living room floor, wax daily?_ "**

…

End of Chapter 4…


	5. Spread the love, the Symbiote love

_Chapter 5: Spread the love, the Symbiote love_

 **(Deadpool: Ok, I got two questions, one, how long did it take for you to pull this title out of your ass? Two, Did you leave the toilet seat down?)**

" _ **Oh man We telling you, you have GOT to take that menstrual group therapy offer… it worked for your husband… wait.. that makes no sense.. oh well, it happens…"**_ said Venompool as he was dodging and countering the alpha silverback ferocious attacks.

Venompool then grab the sliverback's head and slam his own into it repeatedly until the silverback's forehead become swollen. The beast stumbling backward a bit due to the concussions, the betas was roaring, slamming their fists on the ground, as if they were cheering the alpha on.

The alpha quickly return with a massive backhand, dislocating Venompool's lower jaw, at least that's what it looked like. Venompool spun 180 degrees due to the impact before he do another 180 degree spin and landed his fist on the silverback's left cheek, sending it right into the same hole that Venompool went through earlier.

Not waiting for the beast to act, Wade charge right into the building once more as he yells " _ **HEREEEEEE'S~~~~~~ JOHNNY"**_

Everyone then hear a series of punching and debris smashing agaisnt the ground sounds before a loud bang comes up, then they saw Wade flew out of the building while shouting " _ **THERE GOES~~~~~~ JOHNNYYYYYYYY"**_ as he crash and grind on the street for about 5 feet before coming to a full stop.

Venompool still somehow have the glee of saying " _ **mmmmm…expensive concrete"**_ before he suddenly shot back up and lunge toward the alpha.

…

Loki, who was standing next to Aizu smirked as she said "Oh well, Aizu, guess we'll have work to do…this'll be nothing more than a warm-up though" as she look at silverbacks still surrounding the crowd and them as the alpha and Venompool was pounding one another.

Meanwhile,Bell is still hot on his heels as he carrying Ellie and Hestia while fleeing from the silverback,the young man didn't even show any signs of slowing down, his feets just kept on running faster and faster, passing the long streets and manuveuring flawlessly through the alleys and walls of Orario, while the silverback that are chasing them also show no signs of slowing down aswell as it ferociously jumps from walls to walls.

Hestia was so shock as she witness his incredible speed, she couldn't even said a single thing. But the trio's escape was cut short when Bell took the wrong turn, and the next thing they know, they ended up in a dead end.

Bell was prepare to turn around and make another run. But Hestia quickly jumps down from his back and said "WAIT!"

Bell startled as he put Ellie down while he said "Bu-But"

Hestia took the liberty of taking off his cape and chest armor then pull up his shirt and said "There's no way we can outrun this thing… you'll have to fight it…"

Bell quickly protest "But haven't you seen me your grace? It nearly killed me"

Hestia then prick her finger, then starts writing some hieroglyphs on his back as she said "Yes it did… but not this time… I'll update your status… all that dodgings really pays off ya know.."

As Hestia writes, she began to remembers her chat with Hephaestus about Bell's special dagger. She can hear Hephaestus's voice in her head " _Unlike the normal weapons… this knife have a life of its own… you could say it can and will level up to match its owner's stats… currently, this dagger is as weak as a butter knife… but the moment an adventurer hold it in his/her hands… the weapon will took its first breath and will began collecting EXP points the same as its owner… One more thing, this is considered cheating, thus, I don't want a word of our meeting, and not a word about our current conversations got to anyone else,not even that child of yours… got that?"_

As the scene returns to present time, Hestia have just finished writing, however she seems shocked as she look at his new stats that reads

 **Bell Kranel**

 **Lv.1**

 **STR: G221** **E403**

 **DEF: H101** **H199**

 **WPN: G232** **E412**

 **DEX: F313** **D521**

 **MAG: 10**

She then said in awe "How in the..? He got more than 600 stats point increament… just by blocking and dodging?"

Hestia gritted her teeth as she once again thinks of Aizu, the only explaination for this. The little goddess then whispered as jealousy and what seems to be anger swelled up inside her "Damn that Wallen-whatever woman… and her perfect fucking "life"… To hell with her…"

Hestia then confirm the stats update and said "There, now give that beast everything you got… no homo… Oh me… I started to sounds like Wilson…ughh…"

Ellie quickly get behind Hestia as they look back the beast at the other end of the alley. Bell tighten his grip on his dagger and stares the beast right in the eyes before both gave out a loud battle cry and charge toward each others.

In an instant, Bell's dagger pierced through the silverback's chest effortlessly, but it doesn't stop there. Bell's still moving forward as he yelled ferouciously and drove the silverback right into a wall.

The young man then look at the wound on the monster's chest, caused by his own dagger in disbelief. The monster then look at Bell for a moment before it gave out a weak growl and draw its last breath.

Bell breath heavily as he remove the dagger from the dead silverback's chest before he sat down right next to its body, with his back agaisnt the wall. 

Hestia and Ellie rushes toward Bell while the people who was hiding in their houses began to chatters about Bell's victory.

Freya was watching from above as she smiled with sastisfaction.

…

Back to Venompool, who somehow managed to pin the alpha down on the ground as he continuously punching it in the face. After each punch, he said things such as " _ **This is for that kick in our nuts! This is for the neck bite! This is for that spanking… THAT WE SOMEHOW REALLY ENJOYED!"**_

Venompool then picks the alpha up with one hand, he then clenched his other hand, draw it backward and said " _ **And this is for tricking Frodo you sick fuck!"**_ before he punch the silverback right in the middle of its face. The impact from the monstrous punch send its face right into and through its skull structure, like a cake dough being pounded by the baker.

The betas suddenly went silence as they saw Venompool holding the corpse of the alpha, the same as the citizens, including Eina, Aizu and Bate.

Venompool then ran his tounge along the dead alpha's face before a series of tendrils shot out from his chest and plunged themselves into the alpha's body. To everyone's horror, the tendrils then tore the alpha apart, spattering blood everywhere.

Venompool then picks up the alpha's head up and ran his tongue long its scalp before he suddenly chomp a huge chunk of it clean off. Some people within the crowd and some adventurers puked as they saw Venompool bites his way through the skull and gleefully pluck the silverback's brain out then shove it in his nightmarish looking jaw.

The symbiote bonded merc then said " _ **Mmmmm…. brains… taste like overdue toilet papers...see what those times with those Goody-two shoes of the Galaxy have done to us? We haven't devour anything againts its will for so long…we've almost forgot how good it feels like… How humiliating…those do-gooders always be like Ooooo but we have to keep our hunger in check, Oooo it would be good for our Image~~~~Ooooo, we can't devour those homicidal space slugs because we're the Gooood~~~ guys, and gooood~~~ guys doesn't killl~~~~~… how would THEY like it if those slugs broke out of prison and starts dismembering everyone?"**_ with a irritated tone. __

Everyone just stared at him awkwardly.

Venompool then look at the betas, they doesn't seems to be pleased with what he did to their pack leader. The Symbiote bonded merc the spoke " _ **Guess we'll eat the old~~~~~~ fashion way, Bites,Chew,gargle and swallow…"**_

As Aizu, Bate and the other adventurers readies their weapons. Venompool then grinned _**"Dinner time~~~~"**_

He then lunge toward a charging silverback, grabbed its neck and open his toothy jaw as wide as he could before he completely chomp the beasts head off with one single bite.

As he let go of the headless corpse, Venompool swung his extendable arms at another pair of silverbacks, grab them by the torso and pull them toward him before he chomp their upper body clean off.

Wade then caught a silverback lunging at him with both hands, then he gave out a sadistic roar before he snap the beasts back as if it was a flimsy wooden stick. He then rip the beast in half and drop both pieces into his mostrous jaw and swallowed them whole.

The crowd began to clear farther away from his hunger rampage in disgust as they saw the silverbacks blood splattering everywhere. One of the women in the widened her eyes and fainted after she seems to witness something horrifying after Venompool can be heard saying " _ **I learn this trick from Predator…now, these two little piggies went into~~~~"**_ and then a loud crack and splattering sound was heard before Venompool's voice can be heard poorly impersonating the Predator's signature roar, implying that he have just ripped out the silverback's skull along with its spine in the same manner as the iconic main 'antagonist' of the first Predator movie.

As Logan watches Venompool ate every single last silverback in front of a grossed out crowd, the mutant suddenly spots Bell, Ellie and Hestia rushing toward the crowd and make their way toward Logan.

Bell seems to be pretty shaken after his victory agaisnt one of the monsters that can end a rookie adventurer like himself in a flash, the young man took a couple of gasp before he said "Logan… what is that…thing?"

Obviously Bell was talking about Venompool, Logan rubbed his forehead and said "That's Wade, with the pitch-black substance you asked about yesterday bonded to him… That thing is…"

Logan, Bell, Ellie and Hestia quickly crouched down to avoid a flying silverback's body part being thrown out from the chaos as Aizu, Bate and the other adventurers joins in the fight.

Logan then continue "…from what I've known, it's belong to a species of symbiotic alien race… we called it the Symbiotes… True to their name, once its bounded to a host, it will amplifies its host's abilities,strenght, endurance,speed… in exchange for its host's adrenaline, like a Give And Take relationship… though I do not know any more details on…them, I do know that it have more than one way to sastifiy its hunger… and you're looking at one of those alternative ways…the old fashion way…you have no idea what that thing did when it first came to our world… through time… for some god knows what reasons.. The Symbiote became more… obidient… well, Obidient is still not the right word…it's just… have more self-control…"

As Logan said so, he and the others was looking at Venompool using his tendrils to save an adventurer from being smash to bits by a pack of silverbacks before he impale them all with his extendable arm,which have morphed into a sharp spear, courtesy of the Symbiote's many neat abilities.

Venompool then laughed as he said " _ **Anyone want some silverback Kebab-No? more for US then"**_ before he devoured them all.

Aizu had just sliced the last silverback into 4 pieces before she look back at Bell, who was checking Hestia and Ellie for any injuries before looking back to Venompool, who actually gave out a huge burp, which is a really strange thing for a Symbiote to do but not a strange thing for someone like Wade to do, in public.

And in yet another unexpected occurance, the Symbiote suddenly detach itself from Wade by open its mouth as wide as it can and spit him out. The moment he landed on the ground, the Symbiote's color's revert to its original pitch black color with a pair of white rosarch-like eyes.

The Symbiote's body then quickly loses its humanoid shape and morph into a large,very large blob with its tendrils wiggling everywhere. The only thing that stays the same is its signature nightmarish jaw,eyes and tongue.

This appearance of course making the bystanders backing away even further and more frightful. Then Venom starts to talk to Wade in its usual deep,raspy voice " _You know, If we spend another week in your horrendous mind…we'll might ended up just like you…well,we've already sounds like you Wilson, just not exactly like you…yet"_ as it reaches its tendrils out and, astonishingly, helps him get back up.

Wade dusting his outfit as he said " **I'm touched slimy, guess your times with Pistorius wannabe finally turns you into a soft widdle puppy heh?"**

Venom then said " _We guess it did, we does miss our times with him… our times with you have also left a mark on us, we… not sure if its something to be glad about, do you know how long it took for us to learn to speak your human's weird little language fluently?… anyway, we'll get right to the proposal… we'll be your… ally…partner… or…something like that…for the time being… just don't make us go back into that crammed pig stein of a container, and provide us with a food source, of your choosing …How 'bout it?"_

Logan knows this is not a good idea and he knows he should do something, however, before the mutant could protest, Wade nonchalantly replied " **Meh, why not? Just stay away from my porn magazines,my daughter, and we're gonna have to talk about bathroom rules"**

Logan then gritted his teeth and said "You know, it's time like these that reminds me why I sometimes just wanted to split that skull of yours wide open"

Wade casually putting his equipments back on as he said " **Yeah yeah yeah I love you too bro, SO, who's hungry?"**

Just as he said so, a couple of the citizens pointed at Bell and said "Hey, hey it's him, it's the kid who defeated one of the silverbacks all on his own!"

The crowd quickly stares at and chatters about Bell loudly. This seems to surpsise Aizu as she look at him in awe, thinking to herself " _Him? The young man who was hurt because of me? But…how? At his current level there is no way he could have stood against a silverback,it's not just any casual low level monsters…"_

Aizu paused for a bit before she think to herself again " _Either way… I have to see him again… I owns him my apology…"_

Loki on the other hand still have her eyes set on Wade,who was carrying Ellie on his shoulders as they and Venom try to get away from the cheering crowd, mostly for Aizu, Bate, Loki and the other adventurers, and Bell. All Wade received was just frightened stares and disgusted look from the citizens, something that is all too familiar for him, and it doesn't seems to bother him one bit.

Loki suddenly spots Freya, who was standing on the roof of a building not far from where she was standing, knowing her nature, Loki only whispered with a frown "Why do I always got a feeling she might be involve in things like this…?" before she walks off with Bate and Aizu.

…

 _Later that day,in the evening… At Bell's house…_

" **So? How do you like your new place?"** asked Wade as he look at Venom, who he took resident on the ceiling by spreading itself across the entire surface.

Venom poke its head down, showing its nightmarish elastic jaw and long,creepy tongue before it spoke " _This will suffice, the insects that infested this…poor excuse of a house does prove to be a decent source of food for us…_ "

Hestia and Bell seems pretty nervous and afraid as they look at Venom's appearance, not to mention they now have to get use to the fact that a nightmarish symbiotic being is going to live in the ceiling of their house.

Bell then said to Hestia "Uhhh,your grace… I eh… I want to ask you about something…"

…

Hestia then meet Bell in his room, as the Goddess walks in, Bell instantly notices somethings is not right, Hestia was struggling to walk straight, her eyes seems exausted. Despite all that the goddess still smile brightly as she said "So eh… what did you want to asked me about?"

Bell, now only wearing his black long sleeves shirt and his pants asked "Oh, it's about the dagger…" as he held it out.

Hestia jumps as she stuttered "Oh that? It's… Its… Its…"

At that moment, Hestia's felt like her body have suddenly stopped working as she just fell forward, prompting Bell to quickly caught her and put her on his bed.

The young man the frantically asked as she check her temperature and body for injury "Your Grace! Your Grace, are you ok? Can you hear me? What happened to you?"

Hestia opens her eyes slowly as she answers "Oh nothing… it's just… a fever is all…"

Bell quickly replied "Gods can't get sick… please tell me your grace, what happened to you?"

Hestia knows she can't lie anymore, since she's too tired to come up with an excuse. The goddess then said "Ok… I'm just kind of … exausted is all… pulling an all night-er at the refinery is killer on your body…"

Bell said "…the refinery…?" before he began to inspect the dagger much more throughoutly, and true to his suspision, there was a Hephaestus's signature written on the handle.

Bell then said "You…have her made this for me? But… why?"

Hestia suddenly moves closer to him while she slowly sat up and said "isn't it obvious? I don't want to be a useless burden to you… not anymore, Do you know how pathetic I feel while you constantly risking your life in the Dungeon, while I can't even do a decent job of bringing our Familia some real money, you were the one who risking your life to bringing in the money while I… I just…"

Tears began to stream down her eyes as she said so. Bell then put both hand on her shoulders and asked "But… Why…?"

Hestia then look him right in the eyes, with tears still streaming down her cheeks as she replied "Because I don't want to be alone anymore… Do you know how happy I am when you signed that contract with me when we first met? Nobody ever take me seriously because I'm not a famous and competence goddess, nobody want to join my Familia… But you… you gave me reason to feel like I can accomplish something for myself and for those who are under my blessings, you gave me a reason to stop pounding myself with self-pity and self-loathing.. YOU, gave me a feeling I have never expect I would ever feel… I.. I… I LOVE YOU YOU DUMBASS!"

Bell was silenced for a moment before he began to cry like a little girl and hugs Hestia as tight as he could, without saying a single word.

…

 _Midnight…_

By this time everyone have already enjoying their time in Lalaland, Venom slowly detatch from the ceiling and snuck out the door easily thanks to its liquid form, but not before it done yet another strangely decent,if not caring act of grabbing Logan's blanket and put it over Ellie,who already have a blanket of her own.

Once outside, Venom look around before it moves among the empty,slightly illuminated streets before it suddenly extend itself and climb on top of a nearby building and disappeared into the night.

…

End of chapter 5.

 **(Deadpool: Ok what happended dude? This is clearly not the best chapter that ever came out of your ass… did you just got your ass dump by your boyfriend or what?)**


	6. No money, Job, yes?

_Chapter 6: No money, Job, yes?_

 **(Deadpool: Hey you best do a better job this time yer prick… remember what I did at the end of** _ **Deadpool kills Deadpool**_ **? I can do that to you ya know)**

 _Orario, the next morning…_

Two middle aged men,was standing in an alleyway, from their uniforms, they seems to be from some local law enforcment establishment. They were looking at something with awe and shock in their eyes, one of the guy asked "So… what happened here?"

The second man sighs as he replied "What does it LOOK like happened here to you?"

The view then turns to what they're looking at, which was a pile of corpses, while still in one-piece, all of their heads are missing, not to mention some of the corpses suffered horrific cases of broken bones .

The the first man then said "What kind of psycho would do this?"

The second man then crouched down and check the bodies, he stopped after he spotted a tattoo on one of the bodies's arm. He seems to recognized the tattoo as he said "Well whoever did this, we know who're the… target, one of Orario's local small times gangs…"

The first man then said "So… you're saying that this could be a case of vigilantism? We haven't have any of those for decades"

The second man then said "No.. but it is one of the highly possible theories, it could be just another gang related murders…You know, I think we should starts asking ques…"

The screen suddenly froze, then Wade's voice can be heard " **Woah there boys… this ain't CSI: Orario, now shoo… shoo, people are getting bored"**

…

The scene then switches to the Dungeon,where Wade,who now donned his original red and black outfit and Logan,who were looking at Bell, with Wade's X-Force outfit, without the mask on.

It fits the young man very well, Bell himself also seems to like it as he said "Wow! What kind of fabric is this? It's… so… comfortable and breezy…"

Bell then unpurposely turns his butt toward Wade and Logan as he said "It feels like… feels like I'm wearing Nothing AT all"

The young man then once again trying to feel the outfit as he wiggle his butt. This does nothing to Logan but seems to got Wade to glue his gaze at Bell's behind for a bit.

After coming out from his trance, Wade then draws his M60 and said " **Anywayyyy~~~~~~~~~~, what's the point of these… magic stones you've been hording anyway?"** Just as he said so, Venom suddenly poke its head out from Ellie's Spider-man backpack, which Wade now uses as a replacement container for the Symbiote and said " _Hey… we like this place… dark,wet…and full of food_ … _now all it needs is you to be quiet Wilson"_

Bell replied Wade's question as they began walking down the second floor of the Dungeon "Oh those are very valuable loots, here in Orario, you either use them or sell them for lots of money"

Wade blankly replied as he spray the M60 at a werewolf that was lunging at him " **So it's like cocain? But now you can get it killing stuffs"**

Not knowing what is 'cocain', Bell replied as he dodge another werewolf's lunge while Logan slice its head off in mid-air "Yes… I guess you could say that"

…

 _The third floor…_

The scene then show Wade beating a goblin with its own arms as he nonchalantly said " **You know I have always wondered-stop hitting yourself-that why does every single high level female armors-stop hitting yourself-looks like some role playing erotic lingerie? I mean-stop hitting yourself… How? Why? Does it-Stop hitting yourself- actually generate some sorts of-stop hitting yourself in the dick-magnetic field that-stop hitting yourself in the dick-Droveee away all of the arrows or have them-stop hitting yourself- hit only where the armor plates are? …if there are any room for them to hit that is…"**

Logan and Bell was collecting loots from the dead monsters with Bell said "You know…. Now that you mentioned it…"

…

 _The fourth floor…_

The trio was walking among a underground stairwell, Wade was carrying a big bag of loots as he struts casually behind Logan and Bell while he said " **Hey, anyone know why the heck does every monsters we smoked always have something that is… logically impossible items pop out from their smelly dead anus? Like… the acid spitting toad…that look awfully like the non-CGI re-edited version of Jabba the Hutt… moments after I strangled it with its own tongue, a scrap metal pops out… does those poor sunnovabitch have to live with a big-ass piece of shrapnel in their coolant til some sorry ass adventurers, no offense come and end its suffering or what?"**

Bell and Logan can only stay quiet as they presses onward.

…

 _The fifth floor…_

Wade was shaking his chest with pure glee and his arms spreaded out as he watches Bell mowing down the Minortaurs with his 'illogically conveniently infinite bullet' M60, a scene quite similar to one of the many scenes from the TV series Eastbound and Down. The young man's face were frozen and filled with awe from the recoils and the way the machine gun blew the minotaurs away into messy tomato paste.

…

 _The sixth floor…_

Bell and Logan was gathering Wade's limbs and organs that lies all around the place. All that are still intact was his head and a quarter upper half of his upper body, still connect to his fully exposed and still beating. Wade isn't bothered one bit about his current predictament as he said " **Oh c'mon, how should I know the damn monster that looked exactly like a bomb would blew itself up as a last resort defense? I mean, I've fought a freak that calls himself The Vaccum before and I've never seen him SUCK anything… well…anything beside-"**

The screen quickly switch to a angry man some where in Orario,standing in what seems to be his chicken stable, shouting at who seems to be his wife,coincidentally matches Wade's sentence "-COCKS! They're all COCKS, how many times do I have to tell you woman? You need HENS for the Cocks to breed, how else can we get the eggs?"

…

 _The Seventh floor…_

The scene then shows Wade sliding down a rocky slope, with dangerous speed as he stand on two dead giant fire ants with each foot, thanks to the ants special outter shell on their stomach, their corpse slide down the slope quite smooth.

However, Wade began to lose control over his own movement and speed. But the guy still have enough calm in him to think to himself " **Ok,Ok, no need to panic… just remembers that time I borrowed Silver Surfer's board…"**

Then the image of him trying out the Cosmic surfboard began to flash up inside his mind, it shows Wade skiing through a local mall with dangerous speed, and slowly lose control of the board. His flashback self then began to think to itself " **Ok,Ok, no need to panic… Just remember that time when I…"**

The images suddenly been replaced with the images of Bell wiggling his butt while saying " _Feels like I'm wearing NOTHING At All… Nothing at all… nothing at all… nothing at all~~~~…"_

The images just keep zooming closer and close to Bell's butt after each echo of the phrase " _Nothing at all"._

Back to reality, Wade seems pretty irritated as not only he can't remember what to do in this situtation, but now hes have the images of Bell's wiggling butt stuck in his head. The merc then shouted " **Ugghhh Stupid sexy bunny ears hairdo kid"**

At that moment, his legs suddenly splits which causes him to growl in pain, hurmorously before he said " **How much cocain does those Ballerinas have to sniff DAILY anyway?... welp, least this can't possibly get any worse…"**

As he said so, Wade's light of hope was snuff out as he sees a series of pointy rocks up ahead, this prompted him to say " **…yet…"**

Meanwhile, back on top of the slope, Bell,Logan and Venom was watching as they hears Wade continuously shouting things such as " **Sweet Bill Clinton's pants!" , "Oh God no.." , "OWWWW! My John Kennedys!" , "YOWWWW! NOT my Ted Kennedys too!".**

Bell seems to feels Wade's pain as he kept both hand on his crotch while asking Venom "Sho-should we help him?"

Venom blankly replied " _No,he's been through worse… far worse…"_

…

 _Four hours later… The Guild Hall…_

"How many times do I have to warn you ye crazy kid? The seventh floor isn't a playground!" said Eina as she angrily yelled at Bell.

Bell can only bow and said "I-I'm sorry miss Eina…"

Wade one the other hand said " **sheeshh, do you always have sands in your V- "**

Eina glared at Wade "Stay out of this Wilson"

Wade paused for a minute before he complete his sentence " **-Veins?"**

Venom was haging down from the ceiling as it said " _We think it went quite well,the boy wasn't hurt, we got our own all-you-can-devour buffet, Wolverine get some workouts, and Wilson… get to be Wilson…"_

Eina still grossed out by Venom's liquid form, especially its nightmarish jaw and its tongue keep wiggling in front of her face. The woman steps back a bit before she said to Bell "Listen kid, the seventh floor isn't like the floor before it… the monsters that reside there constantly change their spawning patterns, the gap of their levels and stats patterns also change unexpectedly.. in short, entering the seventh floor unprepare will get you killed… It's my responsibility to guide and keep you from doing stupid stuffs that could endanger your own life, so…"

Before Eina can finish her statement, Bell cuts her off "You don't understand, I've grow much stronger in the last few days"

Eina paused for a bit before she said "Say what?"

Bell continues "I said I've…"

Eina cuts him off "I heard you the first time Bell, I just… having a hard time believing that…"

Bell's quickly plead "But it's true, I know it's hard to believe but.. it's true"

Eina then stares Bell right in the eyes for a whole minute, during the staring, both Bell and Eina can hear someone farting, then Wade's voice can be heard " **excuse me"**

Sensing that the young man isn't lying, Eina then said "Fine, show it to me"

…

"Oh my…leather gloves… how in the…?" said Eina as she reads the stats carved on Bell's back, In her private office, she also have Wade,Venom and Logan wait outside in the mean time.

Eina frowned as she said to herself "…These stats is…not natural for a lv.1 … he can just simply walks into the seventh floor like its his own backyard… beside the fact that I now have to allow him to go into the seventh floor freely, I think that there must be some sort of skill involved…but of what kind? …maybe I should look…further…down there…"

Eina then slowly reaches her hand toward the zipper on the back of Bell's X-force outfit that still covers the rest of his stats carvings,attempting to confirm her suspiscions. However the woman stopped before she shook her head and sighs, then said "I think I've seen enough proof… Nice outfit by the way.."

Bell then zip his top back and stood up, as he does so, Eina said "Hey kid… are you free tomorrow?"

…

 _The next morning…_

"Ahhh, it's good to enjoy a day off from times to times…" said Eina as she walk with Bell,who still wearing Wade's X-force outfit among the busy city streets. Today she wore a casual white blouse with a collar heart string ribbon, a short skirt, black stockings and walking shoes,a big change from her usual classy uniform.

Bell seems to enjoy the date as he said "You know, I've never seen you outside of the Hall… well, as in outside of the Hall and not working that is… I bet everyone around here… especially men would love to go shopping with you heh?"

Eina smiled at him "You sure know how to flatter people ain't ya?"

Bell scratches his head and blush in reply.

Eina then pointed at the skypiercing tube-shaped tower up ahead and said "Speaking of shopping, we'll be heading to the babel tower today"

Bell seems surprised as he said "Wait, but I though the tower only provide shower rooms and toilets for the adventurers…"

Eina then said "Not just those, unknown to most new comers, the babel tower also have many chains of medical facilities, trading booth and the likes… AND various chains of equipments stores that are owned by the Comerce-oriented Familias… for example, the Hephaestus Familia, tell me, what do you know about them?"

Bell said "Well, they're one of the most famous weapons and armor dealers, all of their products are of among the highest quality, and with the highest prices…yet adventurers still flocks to their stores"

Eina then said "And that is the shop that we're headed to…C'mon" before she grab Bell's hand and pull him toward their destination.

Bell protested "Woah woah woah, miss Eina, I might be able to survive in the seventh floor but that doesn't mean I'm filthy rich" as he being drag away.

As they passes by a group of adventurers, comprises with one cat-girl, two human males and a short, small build girl with oversized bag behind her back, in fact the bag seems to be too big for someone like her to carry, yet she doesn't seems to have any problem doing so.

The adventurers doesn't pay any attention to Bell and Eina, as they passes by, Bell then accidentally bumped into the small girl, at that brief moment he can see her face. Her eyes was dark, filled with despair,anger and loneliness.

That caught Bell's attention right away as he stopped and look on as the girl continue to follow the rest of her team,unaffected by the fact that he bumped into her just seconds ago.

Bell was struck by her expression as he look on for a long while before Eina drag him away again as she said "Oh, there somethings you need to know about blacksmiths… They are…"

As Eina's began her lecture on blacksmiths, Bell suddenly feels many angry auras and stares pointed at him, from the other adventurers, seems to be caused by pure jealousy. Since of all the adventurers around, a rookie like him get to go on a date with the most beautiful woman in the Guild Hall.

Bell can only gulped as he and Eina passes a jungle of jealous stares until they're within the babel tower's lobby.

…

"Holy…" said Bell as they arrived at Hephaestus's equipments store. The young man couldn't took his eyes of the weapons being display behind the front window,all forged and sharpened to perfection.

Bell said as he marveling at the beautifully crafted products "…All these swords…shields and armor sets are forged by Hephaestus's most high ranking blacksmiths… lets see.. 30 MILLION BARISU? What is this? The Pope's personal weapon?"

Bell's eyes widened and his jaw drop instantly as he saw the numbers, he then though to himself "Oh man… that dagger that Hestia gave me… which was made by Hephaestus… she told me it's a one of kind… if that sword costed 30 millions… how …much does that one-of-a-kind dagger cost?"

Just at that moment, he hears a familiar voice coming out from inside the store "Good morning, how may I serve you sir?"

As the person who said so emerged from the door, Bell was shocked. It was Hestia, she's working at Hephaestus's store as a saleswoman, but more shocking, she's wearing Venom for some reasons.

The Symbiote suit wraps itself around her ideal body perfectly, much like how it did to Peter when it first comes to earth. However, it seems to be mimicking her uniform's color, which is red, thus creating a strikingly similar slim body suit to that of Carnage.

There are of course some distinctive differences, The white spider icon on her chest, and the Symbiote also took resident on her twin pigs tails, it modified her pig tails into a pair of sharp, wiggling tentacles that runs all the way down to her feet.

Another difference is that the Symbiote didn't cover her head. Instead the sides of her face were bound to a series of vein-like markings that connect to the suit and the two tentacles.

Her fingers also been modified into talon-like fingers, the same goes to her shoeless feet.

One most noticeable feature is that ther lower jaw of the Symbiote was covering her chin,while her mouth stays unaffected.

 **(Deadpool:You know, if any of you can draw her based on these… retarded descriptions,I'd tip my scalp to you)**

Bell pointed at the suit and asked "Your grace…"

Hestia though he was talking about her having a job behind his back, so she fidgeting "Oh, you see Bell…it's…"

Bell continue his question "… why are you wearing THAT thing?"

Hestia jumped as she said "OH, this? I was… curious to see what its like to wear a living organism… I tell ya, it's great, Wade told me it feeds on the wearer's adrenaline…whatever that is, but Venom told me that it also eats like normal people to live so it's doesn't really needs to 'feed' eveytime someone wore it, did you know I can crawl on walls with this thing on?"

Bell stares at Hestia for a moment before he said "Anyway, why the heck are you working here your Grace? Remember what I told you? We have some extra money from my low level monster grinding,so you don't have to trouble yourtself with mortals things such as this… C'mon, we're going home"

As Bell grabs her arm, Hestia protested "Hey, a Goddess have rights to choose her own path of money making too ya know?"

Bell quickly replied **"** But not THIS way your grace, please do not throw away your sense of shame and your elegance for this"

Hestia pouted as she swung her arm away from Bell's grip with no effort,thanks to the Symbiote's abilities amplifier and said "Bell, for the last time, I want to do MINE part aswell… it's what… a..a girlfriend do… support..her lover however she can… right?"

Bell blushed violently as he look at her nightmarishly cute, blushing face.

Hestia then said "Listen, just forget what you saw here today, and not a word to… well, to be honest you don't have anyone to tell it to beside Wilson…Logan and Ellie doesn't count, least they won't pester me at work…"

As she said so, Hestia heard the manager call out to her from inside the store "Hey Newcomer, Are you slacking off? … Get back to WORK NOW… pr-pretty please?"

By the tone of his voice, seems like Hestia have lays some intimidation on him with her Venom suit. Nonetheless Hestia quickly said "Oh I'm still on the clock,see ya tonight Bell" before she rushes back to the store.

Eina then look at Bell with a devious smile before she said "So… You're… dating a Goddess heh?"

Bell frantically replied "It's… well it's… you know I… I… you see It's just tha…Ca-can we go to the lower level of Hephaestus's stores?"

…

 _A while later…_

"Woo… can't believe I'm this late… picking that set of armor took longer than I though…hope Hestia won't be mad at me…" said Bell as he ran along the night shrouded street with a bag contain his newly obtained armor set.

He then slow down once he entered an alley, pulls out an nicely forged arm guard that Eina gave him earlier, he take a look at it and said "Wow… this thing is top notch equipment…where did she get it anyway? …But… why given it to me? A snot-nosed rookie…"

As he said so, Bell saw a young girl, quite short running his way, from the look on her face she was running from someone. As she reaches Bell's position, the young girl tripped and fell down.

Bell,being the kind-hearted young man he always were quickly crouched down and help her up. The girl have short,slightly messy hair and a slim body, she wore a two-tone high cut top that expose her belly, a two-tone short skirt and a pair of partially ripped stocking.

As Bell asked "Miss, are you ok?" he heard a loud, rough voice shouting from behind, seems to belong to the man who was chasing the girl "GET Back here you little Hobbit bitch! This time I won't lose you again"

Bell turn around to see a big, tall muscular man, with above-shoulder length hair and a obviously angry expression on his face.

Bell, once again being who he is, stood up and shield the young girl as he said "Sir, I don't know what happened but I can't just let you hurt her like this"

The man clearly didn't take it well as he snarled "Boy, you're in my way… Last warning! Get out or I'll take you out"

Bell didn't say a word, his feet was slightly shaking, but nonetheless he draws his dagger and stares the man right in the eyes.

The angry man snorted as he draw his sword while he said "So its death you want heh boy? Fine then, I'm feeling charitable today"

However as he said so, the man heard a woman's voice behind him "Sir, I would advice you to keep your hand off of him…"

The man turns to see Seal, with her usual bar uniform, but not her usual expression, instead, it was a grimace, a scary one. Further more, she is holding something that Bell and possibly nobody would expect her to hold, a sharp Kodachi dagger.

Seal didn't even let him replied as she re-assert her demand "…I won't ask a third time"

The man doesn't even feel threatened, in fact he grinned, a sadistic grin to be exact as he snarled at Seal "Oh so you want to die too heh ya bitch? I'll kill you both!"

Things aren't looking good, this man doesn't seems to have any sex discrimination and will kill as he please.

However the man froze as he felt a cold metallic sensation touches the back of his head, he turned around to see Wade, pointing his Katana at his face while he said to Bell " **Seriously, I've been walking around town all day today…with my daughter, looking for my Symbiote friend…just to find your Goddess wearing it…at work, scaring away some jerk off perverts customers,devouring a goblin on the loose, ahhh, you should have seen the way she eats, the tentacles on her hair just suckkk the goblin's inards dry like me doing a medium drink at Nald's McDo… I'm pretty sure it was McDonald, why would they change the name? …Anyway, then she got promoted to morning shift manager… you see me and Ellie bought some food and sat in front of the store to watch the whole thing…it's the only thing that is close to a reality show…or a FOX's ultra rare good TV show… I told Hestia she can wear it til the end of the day since it looked good on her… But then on our way home… a realization came to me… You see, I broke the necks of more than 20 motherfuckers so called 'top class adventurers' who was… harrassing my daughter… see, at first I though it was just bad luck that I ran into these clowns… but then when I ran into them one by one in a row… I began asking myself '** _ **Are all adventurers in this stinking city, except you, that… Walnut princess something something, that… elf chick in her team… are all the others adventurers, including THIS motherfucker with my Katana pointed at his face is a total asshole?'**_ **"**

Bell didn't even know how to answer his question, he just asked "Uhhh… you actually kill 20 guys in one day…?"

Wade look at Bell for a brief moment before he turns to the man and said " **Anyway, since I've passes my bodycount limit for today..if you count all those muggers I killed on the way here… I'm gonna do something truly disgusting and agaisnt my work enthics…well to me its disgusting anyway… I'm gonna let this scumbag go… without chopping his nuts off first… Now run along…"**

The man gritted his teeth before he swung his sword at Wade but missed, next thing he knows, Wade's fist smash right into his crotch, then his nose, breaking it on impact.

Wade sheath his Katana and said " **Guess this one is one of this city's top 10 assholes heh?Well… after this, the only thing on his body that is…useful… for… private purposes is his asshole…Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha…Oooohahahahahahahah…"**

The man holding his damaged crotch with one hand and his broken,bleeding nose with the other hand as he said "You'll all pay for this YOU HEAR? THIS ISN'T OVER! YOU'LL PAY!" before he ran away.

Wade shook his head " **Why does every single six-feet-under-in-the-future jerk-offs always say that?"**

Bell then look back at the girl being chased by the man, but to his surprise,she was gone. The young man then asked Seal and Wade "Umm… did… you two saw where did the young girl went?"

Seal asked in reply "What girl?"

Wade added in " **Yea, there were only you, miss waitress of the month and that jerk off here when I got here…"**

Wade then turns to Seal and said " **Oh and uh, That steak was smoke-tastic, words to your beautiful mother"**

Seal smiles "Why thank you mister Pool, I'm sure to tell Mama about it"

Bell then look back at the alleyway up ahead as he said to himself "Ho-How…?"

…

 _The next morning…_

"Man, this looks better than I though…" said Bell as he put the armor set he bought yesterday on, over his X-force outfit, and it fitted perfectly.

The young man then slowly went down stair, but not before he check on a sleeping Hestia, with Venom residing on the ceiling of her room, he can hear her said "Mmmm… Bell…. Ooooo… I love you Bell… Muach Muach Muach…" in her sleeps.

Once down stair, he snuck past Wade, who was hugging Ellie as he sleeps and Logan, who was sleeping agaisnt a wall next to the two. Once out of the house, Bell closed the door behind him gently and quickly make his way toward the Dungeon.

As he arrives at the city's square, he bumped into someone. As he said "Oh, sorry I-I didn't.. see…you…"

His sentence was cut short as he recognize the person in front of him, it was the cloaked girl with the gigantic bag on her back, and the same girl that he saved last night in the alleyway.

Bell then said "Hey.. I-its you, remember me? We-we met last night?"

The girl doesn't seems to recognize him,but instead of her grim expression when he first bumped into her yesterday, the girl gave him a bright smile and asked "I-I don't think we've met before mister Adventurer… Can I ask you something?"

Bell replied "Uh…Yes"

The girl's eyes brightens as she said "… Do you… need a supporter in your group?"

…

End of chapter 6

 **(Deadpool: I…. don't know what to say… well, that's a first)**


	7. Online game cliche no 2

_Chapter 7: Online game cliche no 2 - Joining a team_

 **(Deadpool: Soooo…. eh... how's life? ...)**

 _Orario, City park…_

"So… you're looking for some more money?" asked Bell as he sat on the bench in the shade with the little cloaked girl.

The girl nodded before she said "Lili almost forgot, Lili's name is Liliruka Ade, from the Soma Familia"

Bell seems confused "Yea, I did saw you yesterday when I was…eh… out shopping… But, why me? Why not your own team?"

Lili smiled wryly as she replied "I can't… you see, they don't want a small and weak klutz like me in their Familia"

She then continued "…Lili feels really uneasy at home so… she moves from inns to inns… and now…"

Lili suddenly grab Bell's hands and said "… She've ran out of money… please sir, I want to go to the Dungeon with you" with teary puppy eyes.

Bell then said "I eh… I understand… Are you sure you wasn't chase by some scary guy and eh… bumped into…someone that looked …like me last night?"

Lili doesn't seems to recall as she said "Aren't you mistaken? Lili don't remember seeing you before"

Bell then look at her eyes for a bit before he said "I got one more request…before I give you my answer… Could you eh… remove your hood?"

Lili seems reluctant, but nonetheless she slowly grab her hood and pull it down as she said "Ye-yes…of course"

The moment the hood fully came off, Bell's eyes widened as he saw a pair of fluffy dog ears. Everything feature on her face looked exactly like the girl he saw last night, except for the pair of dog ears.

Bell said "You're…You're a Therianthrope?" as he gazes upon her ears.

Lili blushes as she pull her cloak up, revealing a fluffy dog tail underneat as she said shyly "Yes… Lili is a Therianthrope"

Bell still doesn't quite believe it as he slowly reaches for Lili's ears, despite her slowly back away. Eventually, Bell grabbed her ears and started to inspect them to see if their're genuine for a couple of second before he said to himself "This…this doesn't make sense… the girl last night was a Hobbit… and even her height, her hair, her eyes… are exactly the same as Lily… except that Lili is a Therianthrope… such striking similarities can't be just a coincidence…"

Bell then took notice of Lili,who was shivering with her cheeks tinted red. This prompted the young man to let go of her ears and frantically said "Oh my Goddess I'm sorry I'm sory I'm sorry.. I-I didn't mean to…But, why hide your face?"

Lili put her hood back on as she said "Lili's hair is a huge mess… it's embarrassing for her to show it in public.."

She then look at Bell and asked "So will you hire me mister Adventurer?"

Bell look at her for a moment before he said "Well… Yes, but do I have to pay any deposit fee first?"

Lili seems to be happy with his answer as she said "OH thank you, thank you, and don't worry, we'll take a trial run for today so you could just share…30% of your earned loots with Lili"

Bell then gently shook her hand and said "Well then it's settled… Oh by the way, sorry for the late introduction, I'm Kranel, Bell Kranel, and welcome to the team"

Lili stoodup with a bright smile on her face as she said "Then lets get going mister Krane…"

Her sentence was cut off as she saw something behind Bell, something that made her trembling on her feet and her face went pale.

Bell obviously notices her expression as he asked "Is…there… someone behind me?"

Lili shook her head as she kept her eyes locked on whatever it was.

Bell asked "Is… there… someTHING behind me?"

Lili nodded her head in reply.

Bell then asked again "Is it… like a sentient blob?", a question that show that he seems to know what's behind him.

Lili nodded her head

Bell asked "Pitch black?"

Lili nodded her head again.

Bell asked "numerous sharp teeth and a wiggling tongue sticking out?"

Lili nodded.

Bell then turned around to see Venom haging upside down in his liquid form,from a branch of a tree, true to his suspisions.

Even if its not the first time he sees Venom's nightmarish appearance, Bell still back away a couple of steps as he gazes upon it. The young man then gulped as he try to smile and said "Oh uh…mister Venom…wha-what are you doing here…at this …. Eh.. hour? …you're a mister right? I couldn't truly tell by your voice"

Venom detach from the tree and said _"We're hungry…so we followed you… you're heading for the Dungeon, correct?"_

Bell nodded "Uh… Yes"

Venom then said " _Good,we need a host"_

It then look at Lili for a long whole minute before it said " _Who's the pipsqueak?"_

Lili steps back as Venom lean its jaw closer to her face, Bell quickly answered "Oh, this is Lili, she just joined the team…"

Not waiting for Bell to say anything further, Venom snorted " _We don't trust her…"_

Bell protest "But…you can't just judge a person you've just met"

Venom hisses at Bell before it said " _We've never divolge our judgments before we know something for sure…"_

Bell said "Look, It's not wrong to be cautious from times to times, but this is kind of ridiculous, I mean, just look at her" as he gesture his hand at Lili, whose face seems to be near tears from Venom's appearance.

Venom seems angered as it said " _Grrr…_ _Foolish earthling and your self-rightousness… don't say we didn't warned you… we'll find another food source for today…"_ before it quickly craw into a sewer drain.

Bell then look at Lili and said "So, shall we?"

…

 _Some hours later,within the seventh floor…_

"Wowee… you're incredible mister Kranel" squeeled Lili as she gut the monster in order to extracts the loots.

Bell have just pulls both of his dagger out from the corpse of a giant ant as he said "Oh uh… Tha-thank you"

Lili quickly took noticed of her Hephaestus Brand Dagger, at that moment, her bright,innocent eyes suddenly darken and looks more sinister,the same exact look on her eyes when she bump into Bell the day he went shopping with Eina, accompanied by a slight grin as she said "… I… guess there are more valuable quality to you aside from your skills mister Kranel… Like…that nice dagger there in your hand"

Bell didn't even noticed her expression as he holstered the onyx dagger and said "Oh that, it's a gift from my Goddess"

Lili raised one of her brows and said "I see, must be one heck of a Goddess heh?"

Bell, for some reason didn't even notice the change in her way of talking as he replied "Yes, She's hardworking,determined,caring… I don't understand why she doesn't get worshipped by many people… she have so much virtues…"

He then look back at Lili to see her handing out her knife as she said "Mister Kranel, may Lili trouble you of extracting the loot from the giant moth? You see, Lili's not tall enough or strong enough to cut through its thick skin…"

Bell didn't even think twice before he took the knife from her, turn around and began extracting. As he finishes cutting through the skin, the young man then poke his head and hands inside to grab the loot, at that moment, he felt a light sensastion, a wind-like sensation touches his back. It's gone as fast as it cames, prompting Bell to pull his head out and look behind him, but all he see was Lili, standing about 3 feets away from him with a innocent look on her face.

Bell still feel something isn't right just happened,but the young man quickly shrug it off and grab the loot from the dead monster's chest. He then gave Lili her knife back and said "Okkk… I think it's enough for today, let's head back" and lead the way toward the exit.

Lili silently follows behind,with the same sinister look in her eyes as she slowly grinned.

…

 _Later that day, The Guild Hall…_

As Bell walks along the finely waxed tiles of the Guild Hall's floor, he seems surprised to see Venom, in its liquid form, along with Wade,Logan and a dead body standing in front of Eina's working space.

Bell can hear Eina said to Wade "Listen,I appreciate your enthusiasm at cleaning up this city… but seriously Wilson, you gotta join a Familia if you want to make a good living… may the gods bless any Familia that unfortunate enough of hiring you…"

As Wade saw Bell he said " **Heheheyyy~~~~ Looks who here, little Casanova… little space slim here told me you picked up a little shady furry chick…"**

Bell doesn't agree with Wade's choice of words as he said "Mister Wilson, she's not a bad person"

Wade snorted " **Yea right,so where's that dagger that Hestia gave you?"**

Bell then look back at his back holsters just to see only his standard dagger is left, and his Hephaestus dagger is cleary anywhere but his holsters.

Bell's face went pale as he shouted "Holy crud, I must've dropped it! Oh no nonononono…Hestia is gonna choke me for this…"

Bell then rushes out the door as he said "I'll go look for it, thanks for noticing mister Wade"

Venom then turns to Eina and asked " _We were eavesdropping his conversation with this… Lili indivindual earlier today… does the term 'Soma Familia' sounds familiar to you?"_

Wade said " **Ooooo, you're a detective now eh slimey?What, you bonded with that Rat from Baker Street before?"**

Venom didn't reply as it look at Eina, waiting for an answer.

Eina then said "The Soma Familia… um, to be honest, there're nothing unique about them beside the fact that they're a Dungeon dwelling AND a commerce Familia… Liquor is their expertise, hands down…"

Eina then took out a blank paper,show it to the three and said "However, this is what we know about their God…Soma… pratically nothing, yet he is one of the highly worshipped Gods here in Orario… no one have ever seen him, he never went out in public, furthermore,not even the other Gods knew anything credible about him…"

Logan scoffed "Pretty anti-social for a celebrity…"

Eina nodded as she leaned closer "… There is … just one thing I want you to tell Kranel for me.."

The three didn't say anything, prompting her to continue "… It just might be my own opinion but… there is just, a strange air surrounding their members… I don't know how to put it… they're… very, very competitive, agaisnt the other adventurers aswell as agaisnt their own teammates, as if they're under some sort of influence… However that's not the point, it's their unstable nature and temper that I need to warn Bell about, It is not a wise move to made enemies with the Soma's members… well, I wouldn't worry about you three though…Just, promise me to tell Bell about this ok?"

Wade replied " **Big deal, every other adventurers in this city is already a bunch assholes, now these guys are just bigger assholes on drugs… Sure,I'll tell the boy"**

Wade then look at the readers and said " **See, this is the problem with nowadays story developments in a crossovers… too many boring convos, soooo boring that I can't even crack a joke,not even a funny one… then there's the longggggg, borrringgggg transition to when shit is about to go down, which is technically what you blokes were waiting for right? Because we… when I say WE, I meant the dumbass who's writing this can't just twist the original contents to his whim… That's why Tauriel's nerdy lil' sister over there is as dull as Xavier's vinyl collection…in order to stay true to her character"**

Logan and Eina just stares at him looking and talking to the ceiling awkwardly before she said to Logan "Really… are you sure he's not… some sort of Asylum escapee in your world?"

Logan scoffed "Nope, but he does belong in one"

Eina then turned to Venom and asked "So eh…what makes you so…ịnterested in this… girl that Bell picked up anyway?"

Just before Venom can answers, a loud bell sound echoing through the place. Being vunareble to high frequency, Venom's suddenly loses composure as it's blob like form began to rapidly morph into different shapes before it hide behind Logan's back.

The four then look at the source of the sound, which came from the counter next to them. An angry adventurers just slammed his fists down on the service bell place on the counter as he shouted at the worker behind it "12,000 BARISU? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDIN' ME? Dammit, that's NOT ENOUGH… it's… NOT… ENOUGH…"

Eina then look at the man more throughtly before she said "speaks of the devil…there's one of those Soma's members… see their eyes?"

Wade already notices the man's pupil and bloodshots,not to mention he's shivering, indicating that he's suffering somekind of withdrawal, a severe one.

The merc then snorted nonchalantly " **Just like another rainy monday at the DMV, without any suicide bombing, or alien invasions… nothing I haven't seen before… least he didn't offer to suck…"**

Logan quickly cut Wade off "Too much infos Wade"

Eina stares at Wade for a moment before she turned back to Venom and asked "Oh I forgot… are you…ok? I saw you got spooked by the bell"

Venom crawl out from behind Wolverine and said " _We aren't fond of… high frequency soundwaves…"_

Eina then said "Oh yea, about my question earlier…"

Venom quickly replied " _It's not…important…"_ before it crawl out the door.

Wade then said to Eina " **Sorry, it's on Symbiote period"** before Wade and Logan ran after Venom.

…

 _Somewhere else…_

Lili was walking toward a pawn shop, a very poor quality pawn shop to be precise, the whole one story building was build from several wooden planks being poorly put together then nailed down to held the building intact.

The Therianthrope slowly opens the door and walks straight toward the owner and said "Could you tell me how much would you pay for… this" before she pulls out a onyx dagger from her satchel bag, in fact that is Bell's dagger, turns out Lili was the one who stole it from him earlier in the Dungeon.

 **(Deadpool: Oh C'mon Sherlock, as if anyone who read this didn't get the picture already)**

The man grab the knife and inspect it before he threw it back at her and snarled "Are you kidding me you little twerp? This thing is pratically dead…30 Barisu! And that's still too much in my opinion"

…

Lili was walking angrily among the alleyway, with Bell's dagger in her hand as she said quietly "How can this be? This is a Hephaestus brand Dagger… It should have costed at least one mansion… and I personally saw him slice through those seventh floor monsters like butters… This is ridiculous…"

Lili was busy talking to herself, she didn't even notice she've just walk pass Seal,and Seal. To be precise, they both highly resembled each other, however, upon closer look, it's not hard to recognize the one who assissted Bell in the alley last night. She share similar features with Seal, saves for her slighly surly hair and her ever intimidating expression.

 **(Deadpool: Nicee~~~~, you got the wrong name in the last chapter Humpty Dumpty, I told you to learn to remember appearance… but then again,I did mistook that one vampire with one of those guys from Wham! To be honest, they really do look alike… if you just glances at their boobies INSTEAD of their FACES…)**

Lili didn't even make it far from the two bar maids before she heard one of them call out to her loudly "Stop right there…Hobbit"

Lili instantly frozen in her tracks but didn't turn around.

The barmaid speak again "Show me that knife you're holding"

Lili suddenly feels a chill down her spine as she though " _Wha-what kind of vision does that woman have? I had this thing hidden under my cloak the whole time, yet somehow she saw it…"_

Lili still didn't turn around as she draws the dagger out and said "Oh you mean this?"

The scary barmaid said "That dagger belongs to a aquaintance of mine… give it to me"

Lili quickly replied "Tha-that's a wild accusation you've made miss… this knife belong to me, I've found it"

The scary barmaid suddenly snarled "One more lie out of you, and you'll regret the very day you were born… that's my last warning"

Seal couldn't do anything but to stay quiet.

Lili can actually feel the dark aura emitted from the scary barmaid, it seems to have a hold on her legs and the rest of her body.

The Therianthrope stood still for a moment, prompting the scary barmaid to draws her Kodachi and approaches the girl.

In one quick movement, Lili shot forward, manvuering through the alleyways with the scary barmaid hot on her tail. The barmaid display incredible speed and acrobatic skills,despite her restricting outfit.

As the scaary barmaid began to speed up, she slowly catching up with Lili. But before she can get any closer to the dagger thief, Lili made it out to the main streets, and for some miracle of good luck, she bumped right into Bell who was searching for his dagger.

Bell quickly recognized and asked her "Lili? Are you ok?"

Lily faintly smirked before she pleaded with her innocent voice "Help me mister Kranel… I was chased by a mad wo…I mean an angry dog"

Just when Lili said so, Seal and the scary barmaid walks out from the alley. The scary barmaid wastes no word as she storm toward Lili, shove her away from Bell and quickly pull down her hood.

As the barmaid saw the dog ears, she tilted her head and said "Huh, what do you know, I guess I did mistaken you for someone else…excuse me" before she stood up.

Though having said so, the scary maid still glance at Lili and think to herself " _Strange… I believe the person I've saw last night was a boy…and a Hobbit… This one on the other hand, while looks identically the same,she is a girl…and a Therianthrope…could it be just a coincident?"_

Seal then said to the other barmaid "Sheesh, what have I told you about that scary temper of yours Ryuu?"

The scary barmaid,whose name seems to be Ryuu, lowers her head and blushes a bit as she replied "So-sorry.."

Bell then notices his dagger, lying on the ground next to Ryuu's foot. The young man's eyes brighten as he grabbed the weapon and said "Oh my goddess oh my goddess oh my goddess! You found it!"

…

 _Meanwhile, at Hestia's Familia's HQ…_

Logan and Hestia was both reading a piece of paper, from the clumsy writing and an obvious child doodle on it, Wade must have written it.

It reads " _ **Bored, need some money, Joining Loki's Familia, taking Ellie with me, don't worry, will send earned money back.**_

 _ **P.S : I'm the one who clogged the toilet last night**_

 _ **P.P.S : Tell Logan I was the one who uses his undies to unclog the toilet"**_

Logan only said "I'm gonna kill him"

Hestia then said "I'm gonna kill that flat-chested bitch"

…

 _Somewhere on the streets of Orario…_

Wade was walking with Ellie among the quiet street as the sun slowly set in the horizon. He have his magical 'infinite' bag on his back while Ellie wore her Spiderman backpack on her back as she skips along side him.

The merc was reading a stack of what seems to be profile papers belong to each members of the Loki Familia, complete with each member's portrait, this doesn't seems right as the Guild Hall would never diovolge such infos to any Adventurers.

Ellie look at her father as she asked "Uhh dad? Do you think miss Eina's gonna be mad when she found out you stole these?"

Wade shrugged as he reads through the papers as a reply.

The scene then switch to the Guild Hall,where Eina's counter should be. The Elven reads the paper stuck on her files cabinet that reads " _ **I.O.U"**_ before she sighs "Dammit Wilson…"

The scene then switches back to Wade who was looking at the location of Loki Familia being written on the papers. It reads " _ **Twilight House"**_

Wade chuckled as he saw the name " **Man, and they say I have bad taste in naming stuffs… though, where is this love-hotel-looking joint anyway?"**

Wade then spotted a group of shady, muscular men standing in front of him and his daughter, and they're looking straight at the two, with a series of not-so-friendly-look in each of their eyes.

Ellie quickly sense trouble as she hid behind her father. Wade on the other hand just bluntly walks toward them, despite the fact that he notices the weapons in their hands and asked " **Hola mi Amigos! Cómo puedes ser tan amable como para dirigir a la casa de Crepúsculo?"**

Ridiculously, they seems to understand him as the apparent leader steps forward and said "Sure, sure… but, we'll be taking that bag… and the girl" with a sickening grin on his face.

Wade seems to be pisses but still keeps up his jolly attitute as he said " **You don't say** "

He then gave the papers to Ellie and said " **Honey, cover your eyes and ears** "

Wade then drop his bag, draw his Katanas, crack his neck and said to the readers " **The best thing about being NOT well-known is that you get to see these assholes faces when they got their hairy stinking squeeze toys chopped off…"**

The merc then look at the thugs and said " **Ok boys… lead the way"**

Wade then charges toward the thugs, however as he does so, the screen froze and a hand-written caption appeared next to Wade accompanied by a 'Ding' that reads " _ **Wade Wilson (Infinitus Blabberus)**_

The screen then suddenly unfroze, allowing Wade to slice the first thug's head off, as the other thugs have their jaws drop down on the ground, the screen froze once more, then a hand written caption appears below the thugs that reads " _ **Generic Thugs (Shouldius havitus wearius brownius pantius)"**_

The view then quickly move up into the sky as a series of agonizing screams were heard.

…

 _The Twilight House…_

Loki,Aiz, Bate, Finn, the team's acting captain, along with the rest of the members was sitting around a large, lavish round table placed in the front lobby.

Loki seems to be waiting for someone she keep looking at the front door while she crossed her legs, her actions eventually roused the curiousity of Tinoa, a dark skinned and short haired female member, whose clothes highly remsembled a Amazoness tribeswoman, she stood up and asked "Uh… your grace, mind telling us why are we have to gathered here, at this time of night?"

Loki smiled faintly "Oh… I've just…got a feeling our newest members's about to arrive…"

Finn, the handsome blonde captain said "Hmm… that I haven't been informed of… did you pick him out yourself, your grace?"

Loki seems pretty proud as she said "You're damn right I did… He's an exotic find, you'll see…"

Bate snarled "Don't tell me it's that…"

Before he can finish his sentence, the kick was kick open, revealing Wade, with a bunch of knives and sword stuck in his head, neck,torso and arms walks in, with Eleanor shyly follow behind.

The sight of him sure surprised the other members as they stood up from their seats on impulse.

Wade then dropped his bag, pulls one of the knives out from the back of his head, spewing a bit blood on the floor and said to Loki " **So eh… is that offer still valid?"**

Loki proudly smiled as she replied "You're god damn right it still valid"

…

End of Chapter 7

 **(Deadpool: I don't know about you blokes but Loki's cuttingboard of a chest actually turns me on…)**


	8. Symbiote and Bath houses

_Chapter 8: Symbiote and bath house._

 _Orario, Twilight House…_

"I knew you would accept Pool…" said Loki,with a wide smile on her face while still sitting on her chair.

Wade shrugged " **Yea well, I have a soft spot for money, chimichangas, Wham!, big guns, puppies, babies tigers, great white shark, giant African killer Wasp… and You"** as he pull the last weapon out from his body and threw it on the floor.

The big, beardy Dwarf, Gareth seems surprised as he look at all the wounds on Wade's body, even the fatal ones quickly healed, same as the others members who didn't witnesses this at the Mia's bar incident.

Gareth pointed at Wade and said "What manner of dark sorcery is that?"

Wade nonchalantly answers " **Health Potion?"** as he streches.

The answer obviously didn't amuse anyone as Tiona, the sister of Tione spoke "I highly doubt that…"

Loki then stood up, pat Wade's shoulder as she said "Welp, since you're new here… kind of… let ME introduce you to my pride and joys…"

However before Loki could said further more, Wade pointed his finger at Riveria, the beautiful elven with sparkling emerald hair and matching eyes color then said " **Riveria Ljo..Lyo..Lho… Riveria,aka Nine Hell… I have no idea why they called you that and to be honest I don't care…Strongest Mage in Orario…or so the public says…"**

Wade then pointed at Finn and said " **Finn Deimme,aka Braver...Hey anyone ever told you that you look more like a 4 years old than a 40 years old?"**

Wade then pointed at Gareth and said " **Gareth Landrock…"** He paused for a bit before he said " **You looked like my dad when he's about to beat me with his belt"**

Wade then pointed at Aiz and said " **Aiz Wallenstein… my little friend's idol, seriously,have you ever try to smile? It's not that hard ya know…"**

He then pointed at The Amazoness twin and said " **Tione and Tiona Hiryute…"** then just paused longer than the last time before he said " **Wonder Twin"**

Wade then pointed his middle finger at Bate and said " **Bate Loga, self-loving chihuahua boys… If you lay one finger on my daughter, I'll kill you"**

His warning obviously gets on Bate's nerve as the werewolf gritted his fangs.

Wade then pointed at Lefiya and said " **Le…Le…fi…ya? Lefiya Viridis, I swear to Colonel Sanders's secret recipe you people sure knows how to pick names…"**

His finger then went over Raul and said " **Raul Nord, Hawkeye's cheap stunt double"**

Wade the turned to Loki and said " **Loki, Goddess of Mischief, aka Loki-no-boobs according to Hestia…"**

Loki obivously not happy about people mentioning her chest as she began to pout.

But before the goddess can say anything, Wade cuts her off " **But I find you really hot"**

It was pretty effective as he pout quickly disappeared. She then asked "Impressive… so you have been studying"

Wade shrugged as he grab Ellie, gently push her out in front of everyone and said " **And this is my daughter, Eleanor"**

Ellie blushes as she shyly wave at the members. Tiona quickly said "Awww she's adorable"

Wade then said " **Okkkkieee, you…guys get to know each others while I'm… looking for the eh…"**

Riveria bluntly replied " 2nd floor, 4th hall, took a left at the end of the hall…"

Wade awkwardly looks at Riveria for a moment before he took off, leaving Ellie,his magic bag and the other members at the lobby.

Tione sighs "He's an idiot"

Riveria quickly reply "That's not a nice thing to say Tione…especially to someone you've just met" as she dash her eyes at Ellie with concern, since that comment could offend the little girl.

Eleanor cuts her off "It's… It's ok, everyone where I comes from call him names most of the time… He's kind of weird and scary at times,but…"

 _Half an hour later…_

As Wade walks out from the bathroom, he said " **Oh man… what kind of Twilight-zone world is this? Middle ages armor,no guns,horse carriages,no TV, no Netlfix,No phones, BUT THEY HAVE CERAMIC 21** **ST** **CENTURY TOILETS? WITH FUZZY SEAT WARMER?"**

As Wade said so, he can hear Eleanor's voice as he approaches the balcony that looks out the lobby below.

Wade can hear her saying "…And then he burst right out from inside of the big scary squid monster, its blood splattered everywhere… Then there this one time when he took me to the city zoo when a pack of evil super Gorillas broke out and attack everyone, he tell me to hide in the Zoo's Aquarium, then after he finally killed them all, we spend another two hours looking for his arms… It was kind of scary,but fun"

Wade leaned agaisnt the balcony and observe, he can see most members are impressed, especially Gareth, since he's a man of action himself. Tiona had her mouth wide open as she asked "Woah… But how did your father got his arms…you know, back on his body?"

Lefiya quickly added in "Yes, what kind of healing spell did he used?"

Ellie said "Well…it's not magic…It's my dad's special power, he said he'll tell me more about it when I'm old enough"

This seems to shock the others, Riveria said "I had witness your father's 'power' before… it's… truly something…"

Wade then once again look at the readers and said " **See, the thing about these type of introductions is that it's too fucking awkward, Oooo I have super healing power, but I can't just tell you all about it right off the bat, it's agaisnt the Storryyyy development code… Then they be like Oooo you have super healing power? We don't even know what to say… Or is it YOU I should be blaming here? The only reasons those goody-two shoes can say anything was because YOU wrote it for them… and now looks like you're running out of convos material heh? … Fine, I'll fast forward so you don't have to embarrass yourself further, and save the poor idiots who read this crud from reading the upcoming shitty convos…"**

Wade then quickly grabs the sides of the screen and shook it repeatedly as he said " **Okkk, how do you fast forward this whatchumacallit again?"**

As he said so the screen suddenly speed forward to..

 _The next morning…_

"What the heck is that singing?" said Tiona as she and her sister, Tione walks down the stairs to the lobby.

As the two got closer to the ground floor, they then recognize Wade's voice singing a song that goes like " _ **Just call me the angel~~ of the morning~~ angel~~~ Just touch my cheek before you leave me~~~~ Baby, Just call me the angel ~~~ of the morning Angel, JUST~~ touch mah cheek before you leave me ~~~ Dar~~~~~~ling"**_

Once the two reached the ground floor, they peek their head over the wall to see Wade, wearing nothing but his boxers and his mask, fully exposing his horrendous disfigured skin as he sat on one of the member's chair with a whole arsenal of firearms and swords placed on the large table.

The merc was cleaning his M60 as he continue to sing nonchalantly. Tiona whispered to her sister "What kind of weapon is that?"

Tione replied "I don't know, but he sure have a lot of them…"

The two then awkwardly watches him put down his M60, then pick up his AA12, rub his cheek agaisnt its surface and said " **Oh sweeet Russian design… just like their women, efficient, smooth, simple but deadly…and most of all,absolutely beautiful"**

Wade then began examine it for any broken parts as he sings another song " _ **I only want one night~~~ together in our arms ~~~ this is the longest night ~~~~ we're meeting arms to arms ~~~ Nothing is wasted a life is worth living ~~~ heaven is nowhere just look to the stars~~~ There is a day that is yours to embracing ~~~~ everything is nothing, and nothing is ours~~~~"**_

The twin then feels a hand one each of their shoulders, they turned to see Loki, who was also poking her head out and watches the partially nude merc singing his ass off as she whispered "For a blabbering idiot, he doesn't sounds so bad… I don't know what kind of music is he singing but… they sounds nice…kinda"

Then the three hears Finn's voice from behind "Good grace! What happened to his skin?"

The four then look at Wade, who was checking the barrel of his Deagle by looking through it with his eyes, while the gun is fully loaded.

Then they're all startled when Wade suddenly pull the trigger by accident, the 50. cal round blew off a huge chunk of the left of his head, splattering blood and brain bits everywhere.

Unknown to the four, Gareth, Lefiya, Bate and Riveria have also been watching him from the 2nd floor balcony while the whole Familia watches in horror as Wade, with a quarter of his head blew off put the pistol down then said " **Oh Great, Now who I am gonna screw for a cigarette…wait…what? Oh yea, I suck half of my jelly off… this is gonna take a hottie…"** before he stood up.

It seems that the fact that he shot half of his brain off had once again gave him severe temporary brain damage as Wade began spouting more and more nonsensical sentences as he streches " **Uggghh Now where is my space condom? Oh right…"**

As Wade said so, he reaches into his bag and took out another brand new mask, then proceed to taking of his old,heavily damaged one.

Everyone's face froze as they saw Wade's disfugured and half blown off face as he put the new mask on the table and sit back down, he then leaned agaisnt the chair and wait for the other half of his head to grow back.

Lefiya then put one hand over her mouth as she sawWade's skull, blood vessels and skin tissues slowly regenarates, while Gareth just said "By the Gods…"

The Amazoness Twin can't even speak as their eyes glued on the horror show in front of them.

Loki seems pretty nonchalant as she said "Heyyy~~~ I can see his brain growing back…"

Wade then starts to sing again, while still under the influence of the brain damages,thus a random,out of tunes melody flow out from his mouth " _ **Oohhhhh I blew half my head off ~~~~ Honey, daddy blew half his head off~~~ Bum bada bum badadadadadada tsum tsum tsum tsum badabada badabada bum boom boom boom boom boom BOOM BOM POW POW~~~~ YEY-AHHHHH, Uh Uh Uh, there's a fly landed on my brain,can't feel a damn thing, uh uh like how I feel when Gwen Stacy's death's finally happening, Uh Uh YOWWWW~~~~ Was it whiplash or blunt trauma, I don't care, All I know is that spidey now hooked up with a redhead mare~~~"**_

By this time, his head had fully regenerated, the merc then took his new mask and put it back on. He then stood back up, pick up his outfit and put it on as he hums some random tunes.

After witnessing all that, Bate snarled "I can't believe you actually hired this retarded piece of trash"

Loki bluntly replied "You're one of the biggest jerk I've ever met and I hired you"

As she said so, they saw Eleanor walk past them casually as she said "Hi everyone"

Ellie the greeted her her dad,who was putting on his boots "Dad, did you shot yourself in the head again?"

Wade casually answers " **Nope"**

Ellie pouted as she taps her foot "I heard you singing those songs you always sings whenever your brain is healing from upstairs"

Wade sighs as he kissed her forehead from behind his mask and said " **Oh that~~~? I fell down the stair…bounces off of the floor…then the walls, then the floor again, then the table,then the kitchen, then the kitchen's knife shelves, then the floor again… then that scary monster head hanging on the wall… then I landed on that chair which… eh, split my head open…then my blood…and brain bits splattered everywhere…"**

Ellie obviously didn't bought his story, but nonetheless she smiles, kisses him back and said "Oh, Ok,just be careful next time dad"

Wade then said " **But seriously honey, help me clean this up before those fancy pansies wakes up, you and me had a good thing going on here and I ain't gonna blow it for you… I mean I could sleep in a cardboard box..technically I already did several times…in England… Ughhh…. Whitby… still have nightmares about that crazy hag… but no daughter of mine are gonna sleep in a cardboard box…although a clean, big, with cotton filling cardboard box is barely tolaretable in emergencies like… Zombies attacks, Apple Products Zombies apocalypse, WWIII, North Korea attacks, though that is highly unlikely, that fatass's only talent is swallowing a chicken whole while ordering executions and bluffing, and possibly making 'demos vids' about how he would blew DC to smitherine…also, in case Trump becomes president … you'll never know…"**

Everyone seems to be on edge as they witness the warm, fuzzy father and daughter moment as the two busily cleans the bloods off of the scene. Tione then said "Are we suppose to believe that this…"

There was a long pause before she was able to continue "… man, is Eleanor's biological father?"

Finn then said "He might be a… unatural, unstable indivindual but… his loves for Eleanor seems to be genuine…"

Lefiya said "How can she stand his constant yappering?"

…

 **(Deadpool: Now I know what you're thinking, Hestia could be more of an action oriented character than just a pretty face with a overly sexualize body…or not… either ways, here's a segment dedicated to her)**

 _Meanwhile…_

Inside of a rather lavish, heavily ancient Greece themed and open air bath house, Hestia was soaking herself in a smoky pool with her head leaned back in relaxation.

She seems to be thinking about something as she sighs. Then out of nowhere, Venom suddenly emerges from the water, in a slow,swamp-thing like manner as it said " _We really don't get the purpose of this… bath house place…"_

Hestia took a deep breath and said "It's relaxing…also I smell like booze…"

…

The scene then quickly switches to a dimly litted street, Venom was carrying Hestia home by stretching itself into a mobile cushion. Hestia was lying on top of Venom's liquid surface as she was holding a bottle of booze, seems like she've been drinking and obviously intoxicated.

The drunk goddess threw the bottle away as she rambled "I can't believe Bell is cheating on me… with that…that… MIDGET"

Venom said nothing as it continues heading toward her home while Hestia continues "He was like "Eeeeeeek, you're so awesome Lili" and she wa..Hic… was like "Eeeeeeek you was awesome too mister Bell" …with her… innoc… hic… innocent look in her eyes… I just wanna barp when I saw it…Blurpp… " before she vomit, leaving a trail of bile as Venom moving forward with her on its back.

Venom stays silent during her rambling until they finally got home.

…

The scene then switches back to present time with Hestia smiling "Least he agrees to go on another date with me… Daww I just can't stay mad at him, especially with his cute flusttered expressions…"

Venom said " _Sometimes we have our doubts on whether you're a goddess…or just a mere earth teenage child…"_

Hestia pouted "Hey I'm a woman too ya know? I have my own right to love… Welp, no matter, he promised me to go on a date with me again…later today…"

After Hestia said so, she heard a female voice coming from behind the foggy steam that shrouded the bath house "Oh my, did I hear it right? Hestia is dating?"

Venom quickly dive back down the surface the attach itself to Hestia's back as it and Hestia saw lots of Goddesses of all cultures emerges from the fog, with nothing on but their towels that barely covers their luscious bodies.

Hestia seems to recognize one of the goddesses, who have a elegant blonde hair and a body that could easily have men turns their heads as she said "Oh, Demeter… Ahahhahahahhhhh~~~what a coincident"

Demeter and the other goddesses quickly swarm all over a nervous Hestia as she asked "Sooo, Hestia dear, tell us all about him"

Another goddess budge in "Yes, C'mon~~~ Hestia, tell us, I mean, you're wasn't exactly the target of any courtship from the gods…and mortal men alike… and now, you're actually dating someone?"

Hestia sighs as she said "Fine… He's… young, cute… determined, cute, honest…and… oh sooo cute"

The goddess then started to bombard Hestia with more and more questions while moving closer and closer to her, to the very point when their breast squishes agaisnt one another.

Venom still stay immobile on Hestia's back as it though to itself " _Are all females of this world this nosy?"_

…

 _15 minutes later…_

Hestia was hiding in a bush near the series of bathing pools after she finally got away from the curious goddesses. The thing is she is still naked with no towel to cover herself, the goddess was blushing with embarrassment as she peek her head out from the bush to scout the scene before she said to Venom, who did a good job hiding itself on her back "Ughh… those nosy love goddesses… I can't even get to the locker room without them following me around… Ooooo Hestia have a boyfriend~~~~ it's sooo shocking~~~~~, this is the first time we see a female dating a male~~~~ it's out of this world~~~~ …"

Hestia then spots Hephaestus walking toward the pools, wearing her towel while reading a Punisher comic issue, seems like the goddess is really hooked up on the story.

Hestia seems to be caught by surprise as she saw Hephaestus's expressions as she read through the pages while she silently reads out the dialogues.

Nonetless, this is no time to say hi, Hestia needed to get her clothes back and be on time for the date, so she quickly dashes toward the locker room just after Hephaestus was out of sight.

Once inside, Hestia quickly locate her locker, retrieve her clothes and put them on then be on her way,with Venom still attach to her back.

…

As Hestia was hot on her bare feet, her path toward the date site was blocked by a crowd of angry men,seems like they all knew her from somewhere.

Hestia seems to know them aswell as she rolled her eyes "Ughh… you guys again… In group this time… that's a nice improvement… hahhhh, I should have snap your spinal cords when I had the chance…"

Turns out these were the perverts that Hestia beats up during her time working at Hephaestus's shop, they from the looks of it, they're looking for some payback.

The goddess then flick her palm at them and said "Look, I'm in a hurry ok? I have a date with my boyfriend… so, either you guys move outta my way in one piece…or I'll move you guys in pieces…"

The men's only reply is the sounds of their weapons being pull out of their sheath.

This prompt Venom to wrap itself around Hestia's body. However this time, its pitch-black color stays the same as the Symbiote work its way to Hestia's head and completely covers it.

Hestia then ran her talon-like fingers through her twin tentacles pig tails and spoke with a slightly more raspy tone "… _Why do these jerks never…ever…ever…ever… EVERRRR pick the option that doesn't cost them their limbs, sex life and…life?"_

The Symbiote bonded goddess suddenly lunge at one of the thugs, drove both her thumbs through his neck and crush it.

At that moment, her tentacles moves on their own and stab another two thugs in their crotch repeatedly before Hestia lunge at both of them and drove each of her 5 fingers right into their skulls then crush them on the spot.

A thug was charging at her from behind but the only thing he heard was " _Cock shot~~~~~"_ Before he felt a devastating force rammed into and completely shatter his nads.

As he fell to the ground, Hestia grab his head and rip it right out, creating a blood fountain as she threw the head at the last one,who tried to flee from the scene. The impact crushed his skull, killing the poor bastard instantly.

Hestia then said "Nothing can crush a skull better than ANOTHER skull, heheheheheheh…"

The goddess then proceed towards her date site by skipping joyfully while still wearing the Symbiote suit as she said with glee "I'm coming Bell~~~~~~~"

…

End of chapter 8


	9. I could make you care

_Chapter 9: I could make you care_

 **(Deadpool: Ok, I know it's been a while but it's not my fault, the dumb twat who wrote this drop some Doritos into his keyboard, then comes the ants, then comes the ants eating everything inside and eventually built an ant empire within the shell of the 10$ discounted piece of Made in China Junk, soooo, after an excruciating week of non-stop flyers passing and selling second hand condoms, he finally got himself a new keyboard, hooray~~~~ your "Be a living joke" skill have increased by 5, about 50 points more and you'll be on the same level as me,well, almost…)**

 _Orario, Twilight house…_

"Pool, meet me in my room….now" said Loki as she looking at Wade who was tucking Ellie into bed in his room.

Wade then pop his eyebrows under his mask in a naughty manner as he said " **Oooooo~~~ you sure get right to the point ain't ya, yer grace?"**

The godess sighs as she said "Just hurry up, I gotta sleep too ya know…" before walking away.

Once she's out the door, Wade then peck Ellie gently on her cheek before he said quietly " **Sleep tight my little princess, daddy's gotta do his religious~~~~~ duty, hehehehehehehehee~~~~"** as he skips like a little girl and follow Loki back to her room.

…

Loki's room is rather neat and far more lavish than most of the members, but none of the exotic and beautifully crafted decorations caught Wade's attention. He was busy looking Loki, still fully clothed and sitting on her bed as she look at him and said "So? What are you waiting for?"

Wade then quickly said " **OH! Oh right… gimme a sec, sheesh, no foreplay?"** as he took off the upper half of his suit.

Loki tilted her head and asked "Foreplay? What the heck is that?"

Wade replied " **Oh you know, things you do before you… get down to business to get each other…more ready and eager, so it'll be easier when the guy stick his…"**

Loki might not know the word Foreplay, but she is no fool, the goddess instantly understand what was Wade talking about. Her face quickly grew red as she yelled "NO! I didn't mean SEX you idiotic mortal! I mean I need to create the contract between us, surely that… double decker brat Hestia told you about this matter… did she?"

Wade was obviously disappointed as he zip his pants back up and sit down, with his back facing Loki as he pouted " **Aw man… I was looking forward to it… meanie"**.

Loki rolled her eyes as she reach out her palm, touching the disfigured skin tissues on his back. The moment her skin came in contact with his skin, Loki shuddered slightly.

Then before Loki herself realize it, she slowly run her palm across his back slowly for a moment without saying a word.

And if that's not enough, Loki suddenly asked him with her hand still on his skin "Tell me something… does it… hurt?"

Wade didn't answers her for a couple of seconds, this is the first time someone aside from Spider-man and Logan,Cable, Eleanor and Emily Preston that actually cared enough about his 'feelings' to asked him this type of question.

The merc then replied,not with his usual gleeful, kind of high-pitched tone of voice, but with the same tone he uses the moment after he found out one of the first women he have ever loved, Carmelita died in a North Korea camp " **Do you eh… know what… El Cancer is?"**

Loki bluntly replied "I might be a God, but I'm not your world's god…so no…"

Wade shurgged as he continues " **Its this… ugly, smelly, squishy tumor, kinda like my old apartment roommate Al… anyway this tumor do what most Beverly Hills silicon filled chicks does to their… life-support-bound husbands… sucks the life outta them until they croak… except that this one is a slow and far more painful death…"**

Loki didn't reply since she heard him mentioned his tumor when he was inside the interdimensional monster's belly back at the Banquet a couple of nights before.

Wade then continues " **… So, it's just happened that I have one of those little suckers inside my body... then, just when all hopes are lost for little ol' me.. a… shady sunovabitch approaches me…while I'm peeing out blood in some small time local Fast food joint's toilet… wears a expensive… and kinda 70-ish suit.. said he and his… 'private institutional of super-nerds' and their 'Weapon X' program will not only cure my cancer, but will give me more than just that… see the thing about being ultra depress is that your mind sunk SO LOW, you'll believe just about anything, even if a hooker with no hands says she'll give you the best handjob your ass'll ever receive, you'll actually give her a chance…"**

Loki then said "I take it that you took up his offer?"

Wade continues " **Damn right I did, next thing I know I was tied to a Papa Johns family-size table with all these tubes and syringe sticks into my body… I didn't really remember much of how they shove the 'cure' into my body, except that they have that horrible,horrible Darude Sandstorm song blasting 24/7 in the PA system… bottom line is, it worked… BUT, there are always a catch, see… the 'cure' not only speed up the healing process in my body… but it also speed up the tumor's growth rate…"**

Loki still have her hand on his skin as she said "Guess that explains why you looked like one of those alpha undeads…"

Wade shrugged " **BUT that turns out to be a good thing, see my body won't stop healing even if I'm not hurt… like when you pour water into a plastic bag, you pour in more than the bag itself can handle and BAM, now if you poke a hole large enough and the water will starts flowing out just as fast as you pour it in…"**

At this point, Loki seems to have understand what Wade was getting at, she then get down from her bed and sat down on the floor right behind him as she said "So… what you're saying is… this tumor destroys your body just as fast as this…cure heals it… thus helping it stabilize… it's like… there's a neverending battle right inside of your own body every single day?"

Wade chuckled in reply.

Loki stared at Wade for a while, she kept running her palm up and down his skin slowly without even knowing she doing so for some reason.

It took her a whole minute before she snapped out of it and decided to get back to business. Loki bit her finger then began drawing the blessing markings on Wade's back with her blood as she whispering a chant.

A moment later, Wade's back began to glow and the hieroglyphics that Loki drawn began to took forms. Wade snickered " **Hehehehehe that tickles"**

However, once the light died down, Loki's eyes suddenly open just slightly, seems like she have red eyes. The goddess then look closer to whatever the marking on Wade's back as she read it for a moment before she said in a whispery voice "What in my name…?"

Wade turn his head half way as he asked " **Uh… If it's that talking zit…I can explain…"**

…

"This is… This is… I-I don't even know how to describe it…" said Riveria as she and the others, who have all gathered in Loki's chamber reads the markings that goddess've created on Wade's back.

The text on his back was written in modern fonts and was organized far different from the other adventurers, it reads the following.

 **Wade Winston Wilson**

 **Other Aliases: Deadpool, The Merc with a mouth.**

 **Title: N/a**

 **Personal stats:**

 **STR- Preset**

 **DEX- Preset**

 **DEF- Preset**

 **INT- Preset**

 **MAGIC- Cannot be applied**

 **Special abilities:**

 **Accelerated Healing factor (PASSIVE): Wounds of all types will heal with incredible speed, in addition, decapitated limbs can be reconnect if placed back in posititon, lost limbs can also grow back, but took longer than flesh wounds.**

 **Mind Control Immunity (PASSIVE): Due to his brain constantly being attacked by the tumor and healed at the same time, the effects of mind control devices and methods, supernatural or not will be wiped from his brain instantly.**

 **Immortality (PASSIVE): Thanks to the Weapon X Mutagen formula, every single cells inside Wade's body have become super stem cell and will multiply non-stop, thus halted his aging process,rendering him unable to grow old and die of old age.**

 **Cure for cancer (PASSIVE) : Due to the cancer accelerated damage paralell to the accelerated healing factor, while Wade is now immune to not only cancer,but all the other diseases known to men, the accelerated tumor on the other hand have horrendously disfigured his skin tissues.**

 **Toxic immunity (PASSIVE) : Thanks to the boosted immune system and his whole body constantly renewing itself, toxic substains, deadly or not, will be either ejected by vomiting or simply be neutralized within his body,although highly potence lethal toxins can still have some negative effects on Wade before it's fully ejected.**

Lefiya rub her chin as she asked "What is this… Weapon X program that his… stats mentioned?"

Before Wade can answer her, Loki suddenly steps in and explain what Wade've told her so far.

After Loki was done explaining, Wade was snoring on the floor,topless, leaving the whole crew staring at him awkwardly, with Riveria saying "What god forsaken world did you come from…Wade Wilson?"

Loki shrugged "Well, whatever it is… it's certainly worth checking out…"

Gareth said "Aye… though his world certainly have poor choice in clothing..wearing a pajama into battle is not a wise move"

Raul said "With abilities like that… he can went into battle buck naked for all I care…"

Wallen didn't say anything while Bate grews more and more irritated by Wade's present as he said "I can't believe we have to accept this weakling abomination as one of us, he can't even…"

Loki suddenly put her hand on Bate's shoulder, it wasn't a friendly one from the way she slowly tighen her grip on his shoulder. The goddess then said in a half friendly, half menacing tone "Listen Bate… the only reason me and all of us recruited you was because you have great potential and strenght… I just didn't expect you to be…such an egocentric self-loving chihuahua man, I keep you around, taking care of you as I have been taking care of all your teammates because you proved that I was right about that potential and I want to see more from you, I want to see you grow… but… as rude as Wade's comment was about you… he's right, you ARE a huge jerk who have little to no concern for others feelings and existence, especially those who you deemed…weak and unworthy..."

The other members can only stay silent as they look at Loki continue her speech "… and seems to me that anyone who isn't us is…weak and unworthy to you… am I right?"

Bate didn't answer as he look at Loki's eyes, which once again have open and are staring right at his own.

Loki then let go of his shoulder and tap his left cheek as she said "… so here is what I want to ask of you… either you learn to pipe down that super-inflated ego of yours, or I won't be there to save you when Wade happen to decided that he had enough of your shit… can you do that for me? … pretty please~~~?"

Bate didn't say a thing as he stares at Loki for a moment before suddenly storm away.

Loki sighs as she said to the others "Sorry for making you guys see that…"

Riveria replied "It's fine your grace, someone need to put a lid on that blabbering idiot sooner or later…thought it's better that its you and not… Wilson"

Loki then stretches and said "A'ight, let's get some sleep… night everyone"

Riveria then pointed at a sleeping Wade who was mumbling random things in his sleep and said "We can't just leave him here…with you"

Loki sat down on her bed and said "Nah it's fine…"

The others couldn't believe what they've heard, Lefiya quickly said "Wha-what?"

Loki shrugged "Yea, it's fine, let him sleep… OH Alright, if you guys are that uncomfortable about him sleeping on my floor, in MY room,invading a woman's privacy which SHE have allowed him to do so, you can look through his stuffs.. just stay away from thoes metal…thingies that blew his head in half…" before she suddenly shot up from her bed, push everyone out and shut the door then lean her back agaisnt it.

Everyone was still in shock outside the door with Raul saying "What was that?"

Riveria said "I don't know… I've never seen her like this…well, aside from her very first…and very last date with a god… long before some of us join this Familia…"

Gareth strokes his magnificent beard as he said "So.. you're implying that her grace is… having… affection for the funny man?"

Riveria qucikly replied "Affection is a very strong word… I'd say she… fond of his company… But that is none of our business, we should not be nosing in…"

Raul then said "…anyway~~~~ Loki did say we can go through his stuffs…you guys going?"

Riveria said "Although going through other people's personal belongings is not a polite gesture… I have to admit… his world and its… gadgets truly intrigue me… BUT, we should just look through a couple of items, no more, no less…"

…

 _Half an hour later,way past midnight…_

The whole gang, except for Bate,who seems to be in his room was down in the lobby, each holds one of Wade's stuffs in their hand with curiosity in their eyes.

Raul was reading one of Deadpool's Hawkeye's comic with awe in his eyes, obviously because it's about an archer, just like himself, the young archer then said "So this is the 'Hawkeye' that Wilson mentioned..oh he's good…real good, but only second best compare to me… still, where can I get a set of bolts and arrows like he does…".

Riveria was using her magic to dismantled one of Wade's firearms, it was an AK-47, fully customized with folding stock,jungle-tape magazine,red dot sight and a black paint finish.

The mage carefully examine the parts hovering in the air before she quietly said "Hmm… interesting…" before she put the gun back together.

As the weapon slowly landed back in her hands, Riveria look at it for a long time before she though to herself " _… forgive my rudeness mister Wilson… but I must study this… weapon of yours further…"_

Gareth was holding a Javelin Missile launcher as in the same manner as he was holding a large club. The dwarf said as he does so "What manner of war club is this? it's so hard to hold properly…"

"Wallen… be careful with that…" said Finn as he look at Wallen Stein who was holding a chainsaw which she took from the bag.

The swordswoman look at the wood-and-on-many-occasions-flesh-cutter tool for a while before she said "I like it… but it's kind of heavy"

She then noticed the wire mechanism to startup the saw and pull it without hesistation or wondering does it do.

As she does so, the chainsaw roared, but other than the engine sound, nothing else happens. Wallen then continue inspecting the gadget for a couple of second before she found the button that activate the motor and once again, press without any considerations or hesistation.

The moment she hold down the button, the sharp blade began to spin. At this point Wallen instantly understand what kind of damage the tool in her hand can do to a living being. She then said "I really like it…"

The others couldn't help but stares at her and the vibrating, menacing 'weapon' in her hands.

…

 _Meanwhile…_

"Hahhhhh~~~~ That was the BEST date ever" said Hestia as she and Bell was sitting on a public bench on a lookout point that provide a magnificent view of the city under the night sky.

Bell blushes as he said "Well… ye-yes… it was… I think we should go home your grace, it's already past midnight… you might catch a cold…" with one hand holding onto Hestia's own.

Hestia scoffed "Oh c'mon, why do you think I wear this guy under my sun dress?" as she pointed at her chest.

The goddess then pull the collar down a bit, revealing the Symbioite suit underneath.

This startled Bell as he jumped and said "O-OH… I mean.. Oh… you have… him… on your body the whole time?"

Hestia shrugged "Well… I have someone to…talk to when you're in the Dungeon aside from Logan, also, it's actually pretty useful when you lost your clothes… Not that I… ever… lost my clothes… in a bath house…ful-full of nosy… tall… luscious… and far more attractive th-than me…before… yea… not ever…"

Bell don't know how to respond to that, the young man just awkwardly holding Hestia's hand while the goddess turn away from him as she though to herself "Yiissssss… our first date is a official success"

…

As the young couple was sharing their awkward yet somewhat cute moment. Far away from their position, at the very top of the tower that Bell and Eina visited to buy his equipments, Freya can be seen look out the large window that provide her a full bird eye view of the city below.

The goddess seems to be able to see Bell and Hestia as she smiles "Just as I though… your potential are truly incredible… it makes me so~~~ excited everytime we met…However… in order to fully unlock that potential of yours, you are gonna need some magic…"

The goddess then walk away from the window and head toward a huge bookshelf, passing an intimidating werewolf who seems to be a member of her Familia, if she do have one.

As Freya looks through the books, she said "… of course magic isn't something that one can learn in a blink of an eye… But… it doesn't always have to be like that… sometimes… enforcing something into someone can be quite… effective…"

She then took out a large book and said "…This one should do it" with a devious smile.

…

 _The next morning…_

"Take care your grace, I'll get us tons of money today I promise.." said Bell as he departs with Lily.

Once the door closed, leaving Hestia, Venom and Logan at home. The symbiote said to the two " _We really doesn't trust that little animal halfling…"_

Hestia smiled at the talking smile "Oh C'mon, she seems fine to me… beside… with that frail look, what can she do? Kill Bell with her cute shouting?"

Logan said "I have to agree with slimeball there… there's something about the look in her eyes… I couldn't tell what exactly but I have an unsettling hunch about her over the top enthusism… You should tell him to be careful around her…"

Hestia couldn't just shrug it off anymore once more than one person have the same feeling about Bell's new friend. The goddess then said "Ok ok I get it… I'll tell him… shouldn't you be at work today Logan?"

Logan said "Mia said I should relax for a couple of days… I sort of… help her with some… local extortion gangs problems…"

Venom doesn't seems to be interested as it latch itself onto Hestia's back, then poke its head up behind her and said " _Shouldn't you be… working?"_

Hestia jumped as she yelped "Oh shoot I forgot!The manager is gonna kill me"

With that the goddess rushes out the door, leaving Logan who stood in the living room as he grunted "Great… now what am I suppose to do?"

…

 _Meanwhile, at The Twilight House…_

Everyone was gathering in the courtyard, Wallen was honing her combat skills as she always does, Raul was still reading Hawkeye's comic, Gareth seems to be busy solving a rubik cube that he took from Wade's bag. From the looks of it, Gareth doesn't seems to be making any real progress.

Tione and Tiona was reading some sort of melee weapons magazines, they keep gasping in awe everytime they turns the pages. The combat knives, machetes and combat tomahawks seems to have a big impression on the twins.

Riveria and Loki was examine the AK-47 that the elven found last night.

The goddess was holding the rifle as he said "Sheesh… it's kinda heavy"

Riveria took the rifle from Loki then hold it to her shoulder as she said "I think you suppose to hold it like this… I saw Wilson did it with a similar weapon that night at the inn…"

The elf then aims at a nearby statute then move her finger toward the trigger and said "Then I think you suppose to hold.. this.. thing… down"

The moment she does so the Ak-47 spray a hailstorm of bullets at the statute. Also due to the recoil, Riveria jumped but keep her finger down on the trigger in a state of panic.

The repeating blowback causes her aims to flew around the statue, tearing it and everything in the line of fire to shred. The strange unlimited ammo nature of this world also contributed to the damages the rifle does before the elven let go of the gun and drop it on the ground.

Everyone was staring at the aftermath the gun caused, Riveria was inhaling and exhaling heavily while Loki was hidden behind someone.

The goddess then poke her head out from the person's back and jumped away as she yelped "Eek!" when she recognize who it was.

Turns out Wade was there while the others didn't noticed, he wore an orange hawaiian shirt with pinapple prints on it and a beach shorts over his red suit.

The merc even wore a bucket fishing hat and a pair of slipper, accompanied by a glass of lemonade in his hand.

Loki can only say "What in my name are you wearing?"

Wade look at his outfit and said " **Oh this? it's my vacation suit, pretty swanky heh?"**

"You look like a clown" said Tione

Wade replied "Well Your sister likes it"

Tione then look at Tiona, who blushes as she said "Ho-How did you know?"

Wade awkwardly stares at Tiona for a bit before he pick the AK-47 up then aims at the other statues around the courtyard and dump a bullet into each of the statues's heads as the others look on in awe.

The merc then gave Loki the rifle and said " **You know if you want, I can teach you… in exchange for… some… private… lesson"**

Wade's eyebrows pops up and down repeatedly accompanied by a wide, devious grin are more than enough hints for Loki to understand his offer.

The goddess then smash the rifle into his face and storm away as she shouted "In your DREAMS YOU PIG!"

Wade casually relocating his broken nose as he said to the others " **Oh she'll be back"**

…

 **(Deadpool: O M G that is the WORST Chapter you have ever written… Even those dumbasses who wrote the F 4 ntastic that even Stan Lee don't want to have a cameo in can write better than you… what happen? Writer's block? Oprah? CSI cyber marathon?)**


	10. I love alternate story development

_Chapter 10: I love alternate story developments_

 _Orario Dungeon…_

" **Oh yea~~~ ain't nothin' better than the smell of a running chainsaw engine and pasty red meat on your skin"** said Deadpool as he was looking at Wallenstein chopping a horde of ghoulish, skinny zombies with visible bloodveins on their body to bits with his chainsaw, while he himself have been tore to bits.

"I just can't imagine how do you deal with the pain mister Wilson... it does hurt right?" said Tione and Tiona as the twin was gathering his body parts.

Wade shrugged his shoulders as he replied " **Normally I think of going to The Dentist… or having to assemble those fucking IKEA wardrobes that I bought on Craiglist…"**

The twin have no idea what was he talking about but they just shrug it off and help him putting himself back together.

5 minutes later, after his limbs have fully reconnected, Wade stood up, streches and pull out a Skrull infantry plasma rifle from the magic bag on his shoulder and starts blasting the monsters before the amazed eyes of team's majority.

As Wade and the team was leaving the Dungeon, leaving a trail of dismembered monsters corpses as they do, Riveria glue her eyes on the merc's bag before she asked "Tell me mister Wilson…where did you…aquire that magical bottomless item bag?"

Wade was walking casually,with a bunch of jewery that he collected from the dead monsters on his torso, including a golden crown with encrusted Rubies on his head, a large golden necklace with a oversized oval shaped Ruby on each chain links, a women's shiny pearl necklace and 10 golden rings on his fingers, each with their own gemstones, vary from Diamond, Pearl, Topaz, Black pearl and red Diamond.

As he hears her asking, the merc bluntly replied " **I found it in my backyard when I was digging for eh…Dino bones…and to bury around 50 dead Russians… damn city dump closed that day and I can't just leave them around the childrens playground… the parents isn't exactly the "I-let-my-kids-explore the world around them" type…"**

Riveria was in disbelief as she said "… You…just coincidentally…found it in your backyard? That's ridiculous"

Wade bluntly replied **"Oh Puh-leeze, finding a Giant Bastard Sword inside a dead Cave Rabid Rat is ridiculous… Things like this.. in my world, is as normal as a giant interdimensional octopus attacking the city and hold multiple hostages…litteraly,while demanding a cheese stuffed crust pizza as ransom…funny how shits like that only happen where I live… like every month…and somehow I have to get involved…and ended up making thing worst…"** before he blast a giant bat attempting to jump the team into ashes.

…

 _Meanwhile…_

"Mister Cranel... Mister Cranel… Are you ok?" said Lily as she shook Bell's head, who seems to be unconcious for some reasons.

It wasn't long until the young man woke up,and once he realize that Lily was holding his head, he dashes away from her, frantically saying "WHA..What happened?" 

Lily then said "Oh…you passed out…right after you shot out a couple of fire bolts… Mister Cranel I didn't know you can use magic..."

Bell then said "Neither did I… I did remember… yesterday… I read some weird book… I didn't remembered much what it saids in there but next thing I know, I woke up in my bed and… the Fire Bolt spell have already been applied to my stats…"

Lily then took out a small bag of herb, gave it to him and said "I think we got enough loot for today mister Cranel… let's head back…"

Bell stood up and stretches as he said "Yea… Ughhh, you're right… let's get outta here…"

Bell then gently pat Lily's head as he said "Good work today Lily"

This action made the young halfling girl froze as she stares him right in the eyes while her cheeks slowly glow red. Seems like acts of affection and compliments are something completely unfamiliar for her.

Once he notices the look on her face, Bell awkwardly said "Umm… are you ok Lily?"

Lily quickly snap out of her trance before she turns away while saying "OH.. yes, yes I'm fine… Le..let's go mister Cranel" and lead him toward the exit.

The girl then think herself as they walk "What the heck is wrong with me today? I… I'm actually… DIDN'T Try to steal anything from him… have I... have I started to like him? No.. NO it can't be… it was just some cheap trick that he pulled… before starting to treat me like trash when I have no more use for him…C'mon, Snap out of it Lily… You can't get soft just because some… pretty boy… with a cutest butt you've ever seen and didn't slap you upside your head when you mess things up…"

However, she did glance his ways a bit as they reaches the exit.

…

 _Later that night… At Mia's bar…_

Bell was sitting next to Hestia, Venom, in his liquid form and Logan as they have a little cozy dinner for the first time since the couple began to earn more than enough money to get by.

The young man was wearing the X-force suit that Wade gave him, under a short cloak. Hestia was wearing her usual dress, with the addition of Venom latching onto her back as it noming on a huge ham. Logan have finally removed his mask, on his own will while he enjoying a nice, big cigar with a big smile on his rugged, beardy face.

The conversation slowly got quiet when Bell took out the book that he mentioned and spoke to Hestia about it.

The Goddess then look at the book and glances through a couple of pages before she said loudly "IT's A GRIMOIRE!"

Hestia then lower her voice once she saw the patrons stares at her "Where the heck did you get this?"

Before Bell could say anything, Hestia was startled by Seal's voice from right behind her "I…That would be my fault… your grace… you see…"

Hestia and Venom turns and look at her at the same time while Seal continue "… some guy… seems to have dropped this book on the street as he walk far in front of me… I tried to call out to him but he doesn't seems to hear anything… Since he seems like someone who lives in Orario, I reckon he could be a irregular patron of Mama's bar and that he should come back… soooo… I… kinda… brought it back here… andddd… gave it to mister Cranel here…"

The goddess's face frozen as she stares at the barmaid while Venom bluntly spoke " _A man just… happen to DROP it RIGHT IN FRONT of YOU? By Mistake?While we admire your… beauty, we're not very impressed with your intelligent little girl"_

Seal pouted "Hey who are you calling little girl?"

Venom replied " _We are far older than every single eartlings in this world we have you know"_

Before Seal can retort, another barmaid walk toward Bell's table, dragging a big bag along with her. Once there, said to the young man "Mister Cranel?"

Bell nodded "uh…ye-yes?"

The maid then said "Um.. there was a man wearing a cloak over a red suit told me to give this bag to you sir"

Bell then stood up, walk over the bag as he thanked the barmaid and open it. What inside made the whole team drop their jaw, while having Logan took a long puff from his cigar. The bag was filled with loot, all made from solid gold and precious gemstones. And among those treasures, there was a note that reads " **These babies should be enough for you guys to buy out half of the businesses in this city, will send more next week. P.S Ellie said hi, P. S. S Tell Logan I'll get him some new undies soon. P. S. S. S I Think Loki likes me… she've been staring at my butt lately… just sayin' "**

Hestia sighs as she folded the note "At least there's someone actually likes her"

Bell said as he look at the loots "Holy banana cake… one could buy an fully furnished antique manor with this much loot"

Logan just sat there silently as he stares out the window, because Wade was peeking in from the outside as he wave at the man. Venom seems to be able to sense Wade's presence as it spoke quietly to Logan " _He's outside isn't he?"_

Logan just shrugged in reply.

Unknown to the gang, Loki have been sitting alone in a table not far from theirs, wearing a hooded cloak to conceal her identity and managed to overheard everything in silent.

…

 _The next day…_

"Okkkkk…. This must be the place… Lily said she'll be here…" Said Bell as he walk among a small park.

As he was walking, Venom suddenly pop out from behind him, in his liquid form and said to the young man " _We got to admit… this is a… rather… sufficiently pleasant establishment…"_

Bell smiled as he asked "Must be a pretty dark world you came from heh mister Venom?"

The symbiote replied " _Like we said… we don't remembered much about it… we're exiles… those are probably aeons old memories… we prefer to keep it forgotten…"_

Bell then asked awkwardly "Soo… why did you wanted to come with me today?"

Venom was silenced for a moment before it spoke " _We… feel like we should go with you…every hosts greatly affects our ideals and desires… somes corrupt us… some gave us a sense of right and wrong… some… just gave us pure hunger for blood… your… female "lover", Hestia… affects us aswell…"_

Bell's face suddenly grew red as a smile of happiness appears, Hestia's truly care for his safety, since that part of her seems to have imprinted on Venom.

As he makes a turn that takes him toward a spacious park square, the young man suddenly stop as he saw Lily, who was surrounded by a group of adventurers, and from the look on their faces, they're up to no good.

The young man slowly place his hand on the grip of his dagger as he listen to what the adventurers was saying.

He can hear one of them saying "Like I give a shit, Just hand 'em over"

Then he saw Lily protested "But… Lily have nothing left, Lily have given you all she've gathered and steal from other adventurers every single day… as you have requested, Lily is not lying…"

Bell suddenly realized something, it was her who stole his dagger the other day. The young man just stood there for a moment before he draws his dagger and began to advance toward the group.

But, a man suddenly block his path, a big, muscular man to be precise. Bell looked up to see who it was, and to his surprise, it was the man who threatened him and the runaway Hobbit.

Before Bell can say anything, the man smirked "Well well well… it's the little punk ass kid from that night…"

Bell frowned as he said "I don't have time for this mister, please get out of my way…"

The man then look at what Bell was so work up about, and once he saw Lily, he grinned "I see…. She's a friend of yours heh?"

Bell gritted his teeth, but before he reply, the man continues "… man oh man, so you're one of those suckers that she stole from…"

Bell didn't say anything as he stares the man right in the eyes. The man then continues "… Tell you what, let's put our unpleasant encounter behind, you could help me with stealing that bag from her… Now of course I wouldn't just as you for free, we'll split 60-40 of what's in that big ol' bag on her back… You just distract her, I'll do the dirty work… though I couldn't really call it dirty.. I mean, she's just a supporter, a useless piece of trash, ain't nobody gonna miss her when she's dead…I'm doing her a favor here by ending that miserable life she have to live with… SO, what do you say kid?"

Bell can feel something running through his body, a type of energy he have never felt before, an energy that rises the anger in his soul as fast as his heart was beating at the moment. And not known to both, there were a vein-like pitch black liquid slowly crawling up behind his neck, covering a large area of Bell's neck with itself as it does so.

Seems like Venom is slowly intergrate itself into Bell's body since it feels his anger and decided to feed off of it.

Bell then spoke, not with his usual bright, and soft voice, but with a dark and slightly deeper tone "So? What makes you think I'll betray her just because of that? You dirtbag was forcing her to do these things… fucking shameless bunch, the lot of yer'…"

The man suddenly backed off as he feel a dark aura coming from the young man's eyes. Knowing it was a no, he spitted at Bell's feet and storm off.

Bell then took a deep exhale as he look back at Lily. Seems like she was able to convince the group to leave her alone. He seems to be glad as he rushes toward her and said "Lily, I heard it from afar… did they hurt you?"

Lili once again was caught off guard, a human actually asked her if she was alright. The young halfling girl slightly blushes as she said "Oh…No.. they just… threatened Lily a bit… the..they didn't do anything else…C'mon mister Cranel, it's almost noon, we need to get as much loot as we can today"

And with that, the young girl lead him on once more, carrying the oversized bag on her back while Bell follow behind, with a concerned look on his face as he look at her from behind.

However, that was not the only thing on his mind. The young man then thought to himself "… What happened to me back there? … I actually let my anger flow right out… I…I actually wanted to stab that man dead right where he stand… Ho..How could I hav…"

Bell's eyes widened as he reaches for the back of his neck, but before he could reach it, Venom's voice echoes in his head " _That's was just a fraction of what it feels like when you become our host…we can feel your supressed anger toward that ape, kid…we just have you unleashed it subconciously… as unpleasant as it sounds to you eartlings… that was one of our main source of food since day one… since we arrived on earth…in return, we gave our host powers they could only dreamed of and full control of that power…"_

Bell quietly said "So this is how Hestia feels when she…wore you?"

Venom replied " _More or less… yes… but that won't affect us in any way… it's who the host IS,and what they desires and stand for affects us… we can see… goodness in you kid… lots of it…and a slight lust for females company… so you don't have to worry…much…"_

Bell is somewhat satisfied with Venom's answer as he stopped asking and catching up with Lili as they went through the entrance.

As they descend down the stairs leading to the first floor, Venom spoke again in Bell's head " _Are you sure you still want to trust her… after what she did?"_

Bell then said "Even if I confronted her about it… she wouldn't tell me why… but seeing what those men have said… I think she was forced into doing it…"

Venom grunted " _Ugh… you remind us of Parker… our very first host… oh how young and naïve he was… always so forgiving…"_ as they descended further down and eventually out of sight.

After the two have entered the Dungeon, Wade and Wallen slowly follow behind them. The merc was armed with his twin katana, two Desert Eagles and the AA12 he loved so much.

Wade then said to Wallen " **You know… I really appreciated that you agreed to help me with this… I kinda took you for some… anti-social rich brat with a stick-in-the-mud family line and everything…"**

Wallen faintly smiled "I feel that it's my repsonsibilty to protect him…as an apology… but if what miss Eina and Loki said about the Soma Familia is true… he could be in serious troubles…"

….

 **(Deadpool: Flashback timee~~~~ this time, in doodle mode, courtesy of yours truly)**

Then a large piece of paper covered the whole screen, then a poorly drawn doodle of Wade, Eina,Wallen and Loki appeared. Then Eina's doodle started to move its arms and mouth, with Wade's voice mimicking her voice,poorly " **Yo homegirl, tell me what chu' know about these Soma jerkwads, because of reasons"**

Then Loki's doodle,which is actually being drawed with much better details than the other doodles started moving, once again with Wade's voice poorly mimicking her voice " **Girrll~~~ you best tell that Bell boy to watch his ass, those Soma motherfuckers are troubles, 'dem leader baited their asses with the perfect motherfucking Soma liquor, them' boyz love to get fucked up sooo bad they'll do anything fo' that booze, even capping that poor kid's round~~~soft~~~ bouncy ass"**

Then Wallen's doodle started speaking, of course, with Wade's voice poorly mimicking it " **Me and mister Wade shall take this glorrrious~~~ task your grace!"**

Wade's doodle then spoke, with his voice obviously " **Yea… what she said"**

Then there was a short pause before Loki's doodle spoke again " **Oh Wilson, please promise me you'll come back safe! I don't know how can I live on with my eternal life without you and your manigficent… package~~~"**

Then Wade's doodle spoke " **Oh don't you worry babe, I'll be back… and you better be naked on the bed when I burst through that door with nothing but my mask on…"**

Then Loki's doodle spoke " **Oh Wade, I can't take it anymore, take me, take me right in front of them, TAKE ME RIGHT ON THIS TABLE, You big red blabber mouth,you!"**

Suddenly the piece of paper was scrapped and tore apart, revealing Wallen's face behind it as she said, in her own voice "Mister Wilson, I believe that… last part never occurred…"

Wade shrugged as he threw away the scrapped papers " **Well, it'll be happening pretty soon yer highness~~~"**

Wade then said " **And about that little pipsqueak that he befriended and hanging out with lately… I have a bad feeling about her…and… for her…"**

Wallen slowly nodded "I did notices her expressions and strange fidgeting aswell… I would suggest we stay alert

Wade then draws his AA12 and said " **Speak for yourself, I don't need to stay alert, I have an fully automatic Boomstick"**

Shortly after Wade and Wallen went inside, the man whose's offer for Bell was rejected earlier suddenly approaches the entrance, with another group of adventurers.

...

 _Meanwhile, at Hestia Familia's home…_

Hestia was look at something with horror in her eyes as she stood in the bathroom with nothing but the towel wrap around her body.

She then slowly crouches down and move closer while saying "What in the world is this thing? Looks like… Venom's… poop". It was a some sort of living liquid substain with the a light purple color with a couple of tendrils sticking to the wall.

The goddess then pick up the toilet brush and try poking it. But the moment it got close, the being suddenly jumped at her and starts wrapping itself around her body.

Hestia intially screamed out of shock when it latched onto her breasts. Then she tries to pull it off of her but the being seems to be very persistent. The goddess then shouted "GET OFF ME YOU…YOU, WHATEVER THE HECK YOU ARE! I'M TRYING TO TAKE A NICE WARM BATH HERE… AND POSSIBLY PLEASURING MYSELF WHILE I'M AT IT!" as she keep trying to pull it off of her body.

However, her effort are all in vain, it wasn't long before it fully enveloped her.

The view then switch to Hestia's point of view. Once she began to see again, her vision was altered into some sort of light red tinted one. Hestia then look at her arms, which was fully enveloped by the liquid being, altered her fingers into sharp, long claws.

The Goddess jumped as she spoke "What the…?" but not with her usual voice. It was replaced with a more raspy, but still quite feminine one.

Hestia then notices her mouth can open much wider and usual and a long, drooling tongue was wiggling in front of her face the moment she starts speaking. This prompted her to rush toward the mirror and look at it.

And to her surprise, she was wearing a symbiote suit,from the white, rorsarch like eyes and the nightmarish set of teeth, but it's not Venom. This one is purple, with two spikes where her shoulder would be, it have also modified her hair into a series of long,slicked back dreadlocks-size tendrils that touches the ground.

This one doesn't have an emblem on the chest like Venom, seems like it's a newborn.

As Hestia slowly run the tip of her claws across her cheek, she can hear the same raspy, feminine voice, her current voice eachoes inside her head " _We've been waiting for you…as Venom have requested…We. Are. Jealousy!"_

End of chapter 10

…

 **(Deadpool: Hey, you better let me smoke those jerkwads ya hear? I don't care if one of them…or all of them are your boyfriends, YOU better let me finish what the one who draws the manga never bother to consider… shoving some sweet ol', ice cold Karma up their asses… C'mon, people read the original content long before you decided to ruin it with your horrible story telling skills… they want those pricks dead… or at least got their dicks chopped off as much as I do…)**


	11. The Bad, The worse and the dead

Chapter 11: _The bad,the worst and the dead_

 **(Deadpool: As much as I loveee being the center of my own story, I think lil' bunny boy deserve a chance aswell…So… let's be on with the chapter… Oh god I sounded like one of those writers who can't even think of a realistic conversations between characters… Have you SEEN them? They were like "generic dork no.1: Hi, me name is something something, me here to join, then, generic dork no.2 be like : "yes, me welcome you, follow me to you bunk" and dork no.1 be like "Gee, nice bunk, me want food, then *insert horribly written jokes here* … I'm sorry, I though you were the only horrible writer out there… turns out there are more than one of you… cheer up, least you don't have to be alone when you go to those group therapy session about "Why do I keep having writer's block as much as I got server constipation?" )**

 _Orario Dungeon, Tenth floor…_

" **And so you see, that is why I think it should be legal to own a nuclear warhead"** Said Wade as he and Aiz enters the entrance to the tenth floor,and inside was some of the most unconventional sight, a misty forest right inside of a gigantic cave system.

The ceiling are so high, plus with the thick mist covering the environment, it certainly gives one the feeling that they're lost inside a real outdoor forest. As the two passes through the seemingly endless lines of trees, Aiz said "Why would he decided to descend to this floor? Even at his current skills… it's still too dangerous…"

Wade took a sniff at the air around him before he said " **No kiddin', smells like Bin Laden's hideout here…"**

Aiz then said as she draws her sword "No… I meant… Them"

Once she said so, from the distance, a monster appeared, it seems to be a boar-like head with a humanoid body, armed with a big stone club and what must be half a ton of fat in its belly. In fact, the fat seems to have covered the lower region of his body, where his genital should be.

As it approaches the duo, baring its fangs and angrily snorting at the two, Wade shrugs " **It's just a fatass…ehhh… holy shit Bebop is that you? Whoohoohoo~~~ dude you've really let yourself go since Bay fucked up your show heh?"**

Just as the merc said so, about 12 more of them emerges from the mist, and they obviously doesn't seems to be welcoming the two.

The guy then blanly said " **Ok now this is just like that time when I went to Walmart with Ellie… except that they have clothes on…and their body jiggles everytimes they talk…and they was riding their fatmobiles indoor… Have you ever fought a bunch of obese Zombies? Oh man you should have seen them… the way they have to crawl,roll their way towards me… I actually almost feels sorry for them…almost… so I decided to do my shopping… while watching them trying so hard to… chase after me… anyway, we have a good laugh-well mostly I had a good laugh… and the janitors had one heck of a time cleaning up on Isle 4… Nutella section…"**

…

The scene then show Wade and Ellie standing at the self-service checkout point at Walmart, trying to scan his purchases, which seems to be a load of assault rifles and shotguns.

Behind the two was a bunch of obese zombies, still trying to crawl their way toward the two but didn't make any real process in doing so.

As Wade swiped a Shotgun's tag, the system then said " _Insufficient scanning speed, please try a little faster"_

Wade shrugged and do what it said, and what he got was " _Excessive scanning speed, a little slower please"_

Wade still seems to be quite calm as he try a bit slower, and once again, the machine spoke " _Insufficient scanning speed, plea…"_

It's sentence was cut short when Wade smashes the computer and pushes his cart out of the establishment with Ellie running right next to him,top speed as the alarm siren screams behind them.

As the two got back into his car with Wade's newly bought firearms being placed in the backseats, the merc then said to his daughter " **Ellie.. when you grow up, don't do what I just did ok honey?"**

Ellie smiled "Don't worry dad, I won't… But… why didn't you ask that clerk who was hiding under checkout number 5 to scan your things?"

Wade shrugged " **I don't like him pumpkin… He's a big jerk…how dare he making fun of Bea Arthur… right in front of me"**

…

Back to the present,Wade then draw his Katanas and said " **It's porkchop time…"**

The merc then pause for a bit before he look at the screen and said " **Porkchop time? What is this? FOX?"** before he dashes toward the monsters along with Aiz.

Wade quickly slice the first monster's leg clean off while Aiz cut the monster's torso into 4 pieces before she said to Wade "Mister Wilson, they're Orcs…"

The two then split before each heading toward different groups of orcs. Aiz doesn't waste anytime as she cuts her preys down with lightning speed. Wade on the other hand didn't even waste time with fancy swordplays, he draws his AA12 and just spray the shells at the unfortunate Orcs.

…

 _Meanwhile, deeper in the undeground forest…_

Bell was struggling as he trying to dodge the powerful attacks from the orcs that was rushing him while Lili was hiding not far from where the fighting was.

The young man manages to incapacitated an Orc by cutting through its left leg's muscles with his Hestia Dagger, bringing the monster to its knees. Bell then dodge another incoming attack and stab the next Orc in both its eyes.

As the Orc roared with anger and pain, Bell attempted to deliver the finishing blow by lunging at it and aim his dagger at the beast's neck. But right at that moment, some sort of high velocity projectile hit him right in his hand, forcing him to drop his dagger.

Not only that, the Orc's wild club swipes while being blind hit Bell right in his stomach as he got close, launching the young man about 2 meters before he crashed on the ground.

Bell quickly got up and head for his dagger and pick it up while looking around and shouted "Who's there?Show yourself?"

Bell then noticed something on the ground not far from where he stand. It seems to be some sort of smoke grenade.

The Bell slowly approaching the device, once he recognize what it was, he said "Wait… isn't this a monster attracting bomb? Who would… No…No…"

Venom then suddenly spoke " _We've told you…"_

The moment Venom said so, Bell can feel the ground around him shaking, from the footsteps of hundreds and hundreds of angry Orcs that weight half a ton heading his direction. While his speed is impressive, his current damages are no match for the Orc's high resistant nature.

Bell then saw Lili among the mist, staring at him, with the same gaze she have when they grinding the Dungeon together. Bell just whispered "Lili…"

As he said so, a hoard of Orc emerges from the mist behind him. Lili then said "I'm sorry mister Cranel… but you shouldn't have been so nice… It could get you kill…"

And with that, the young girl turn away and ran off, as her images got farther and farther from his sight, Bell can clearly saw her ears disappeared, seems like it was just a illusion magic in order to hide her true identity.

Bell couldn't even believe all of that just happened, he still stood there and look on with disbelief in his eyes as the Orcs got closer and closer behind him.

And before he knew it, a club smashes into his side, launching the young man right into a nearby tree. As he landed, Bell grunted as he tried to move his left arm. It didn't move and a sharp pain was all he got, his left arm was broken from the direct hit.

Things couldn't be worse for the young adventurer, one of his arm is incapacitated he's far too exaushted, and each of his oppnents is much powerful than he is. Yet Bell still try his best to get back up and ready his dagger.

At that moment, Venom didn't even say anything as it crawl down his broken arm and wrap itself around it.

Bell look at his other arm and said "He-hey, what are you doing?"

Venom then said " _Saving your naïve butt"_ before it work its way up his torso, and just moments later, the symbiote have completely enveloped his whole body.

As Bell regaining his composure, he take a look at his body and hands. Not only that he couldn't even feel the pain in his broken arm, he could actually move it around freely.

The young man then reaches for his mouth and touches it. Of course, the first thing that he felt was a dozen of razor sharp,elonged,nightmarish looking teeth.

The young man then look at the approaching Orcs, his normal vision has been modified into a thermal vision by Venom's power. Bell's voice then can be heard, but with a much deeper tone "I…It…It feel… It feel great"

Then, without another word, his vision shows that Bell immedietely lunge right at the first Orc, stabbing it repeatedly in his neck until the monster's heat signature began to turns blue, indicating that it died.

Bell then can feel a strange tingly feeling inside his head, then a blurred vision of a club being swung at his face flashes through his head.

The vision then show that Bell dodged a club swipe before he jumped on to another Orc before he stab it in its forehead, then plunge his talon-like fist into the beast's neck then rip out something, which looked like its vocal cord. The thermal imaging show the blood spraying out from the wound, which was marked with a shade of glowing red.

The view, which was still being shown through Bell's eyes indicating that he jumped down from the dead orc's body then lift it up and threw it at the others before he grabbed a nearby orc's club, then charges toward the next group of orcs and smashes the first one in its head.

He then dodges yet another attack from the back before he swung the club at his attacker's leg, broken it in the process before he repeatedly smashes the club down on the orc's head until the thermal imaging shown nothing but a headless body.

However, before Bell can dispatch another one, he suddenly heard Lili's scream, much deeper in the forest.

Not even considered what she've done to him, Bell's thermal vision shown that he holstered his dagger and head toward the source of the scream by running on four limbs like a cheetah.

…

 _Meanwhile… In some sort of cave…_

The scene then show Lili, with her cloak being stripped away from her, revealing the same exact outfit that the Hobbit Bell ran into that fateful night. The young girl was crying as she lying on the ground and have one hand on her bruised stomach.

In front of her was the man that threatened Bell the other night, the man who offered Bell to be his partner just this morning. He was rummaging through her bag with a sadistic grin on his face.

When he found what seems to be a short dagger but was forged from some sort of crystal he chuckled "Holy shit, a magic sword… what, did you stole this from some suckers who fell for your innocent look aswell?"

Lili didn't reply as she stares at him with pain in her eyes.

The man then went over to her and lauches his boots into her stomach once more, causing Lili to screamed in agony before he grabbed her neck "YOU are gonna pay for stealing MY sword you little thieving Hobbit, NOBODY STEAL from GED Ya HEAR? NOBODY! DO you know how hard it was to find you? But… that doesn't matter anymore… I've found me some… partner to track you down since you came in here…And…"

"You sure are a outspoken guy ain't ya?" said a man with a pair of bear ears and a set of broad mutton-chop as he and two more adventurers, one with a anime-ish spiky hairdo and one with an afro emerges from the mist.

The one who was torturing Lili, whose name was Ged seems to recognize the 3 as he said "Gee Canoe, you three sure are fast… Anyway, you're right, this scum sure have some valuable loot on it alright"

Lili seems shock she look at the man's partner before she though to herself "So… it was him… Canoe… Why do the reasons for my pain never leave me alone for just one day?"

Canoe, which was the man's name didn't even say anything as he threw something on the ground in front of Ged and Lili, causing him to back away on impulse.

It was a upper body of a giant ant, which seems to be barely hanging on to its dear life as it struggling to crawl forward.

Ged then look at his supposed partner and said "What…what Is the meaning of this?"

Canoe then spoke with an incredibly irritating tone "Isn't it obvious? I tricked you"

He then signal his two companion to grab Lili's bag,much to Ged's protest before continuing "… This thing is going to attract a whole lot more in…"

As he said so, a hoard of giant ants emerges from the holes that was all over the cave, there must be about half a thousand of them as they quickly surround the group.

Ged gritted his teeth as he shouted "YOU FUCKING BACKSTABBING MOTHER…"

Canoe then quickly slice one of the ant that decided to charge at him in half before he said "..I don't think getting mad at me is going to help save your life Ged… though running might…"

Ged couldn't even reply to that as he turns and dashes off. But not before he took his anger of being betrayed on Lili once more by kicking her in her already injured stomach, sending more pain into her body and more tears out from her eyes.

Once Ged's out of sight, Canoe then approaches Lili and said "What did I always tell you?"

Lili didn't reply as she tries to look away from him and battling the pain in her stomach.

Canoe then continue "Always watches our back… and here we are, endangering our lives because you was being a lazy Supporter.."

Still no reply from Lili, only tears and silence.

A small grin suddenly appears on Canoe's face as he grabbed her collar and said "But no worry, I forgive you… and to show my tolerance nature… I'm gonna give you another chance to help us" as he dragged her on the ground toward the hungry ants.

Then, with one swift swung, he threw Lili right at the approaching horde of ants and said "…All you need to do… is to buy us sometime"

As her body was still airborn, Lili can feel as if time have stopped, giving her times to reflect on her actions before she said "… I guess… this karma… for what I did to mister Cranel… after he accepted me…without even suspecting my motives…"

As she crashes and roll on the ground, her thoughs continues "… He treats me…like a normal human being… he smiles... and complimented me… without having any dark intent agaisnt me… and yet… I… I just left him there to die… I deserve this… I truly deserve this…"

As Lili look at her indirect murderers walk away with their lives she though "…But Why god? You took away my parents… you took away my happiness…you took away my freedom… and making me live with it… All I wanted to was to get enough money so I can leave those savage Soma Familia… To finally feel what its like to be free… Now I ended up deceiving people… just like those scumbags… Well… at least after this… I finally be able to reset…" before she slowly closed her eyes.

However, she can hear a chilling shriek that had her shot open her eyes. As she does so, a figure landed right in front of her.

Before Lili can have a good look at who it was, the figure dropped something from its hand. Lili yelped in horror as she look at the item he dropped.

It was Ged's head, and the only expression on its face was of pure terror, instead of his usual sadistic grin.

The figure then lunged toward the first group of ants and began killing them, with its barehands. Lili slowly got up to have a look at her savior, and what she saw was a humanoid male, with a muscular and a thin build. His skin was pitch black, with a white spider emblem on his chest.

She can see a white pair of rosarch-like eyes, a nightmarish set of jaw and a long, wiggling tongue that constantly drooling as he devouring and tearing the ants apart. Of course that didn't stop the ants from advancing toward their death.

It was Bell,who is now wearing the Symbiote suit. His overall appearance seems much similar to Carnage, minus the colors. The young man then gave out a loud, echoing shriek before a series of tendrils emerges from his whole body and impale every single ants in its sight, killing them.

Since Lili still don't know who it was, she struggling to move away as far as possible when she see Bell approaching her, couches down, bearing his terrifying jaw close up to her face.

Lili's tears kept streaming out of her eyes as she trembled. Bell, still have his face covered slowly move his face closer to Lili's face, then down to her body and took a couple of sniffs before he spoke "He's not alone…. Where are the others?"

Lili somehow have recognized Bell's voice even when it've been modified as she said in disbelief "Mis..Mister Cranel?"

Bell didn't say anything as he gently pick her head up with one hand then place his other hand on his thigh,where his supplies pouches should be, and a vial of health potion then emerges from under the symbiote suit's surface.

He pop open the lid and feed it to her before ask her again "Where are they?"

Lili couldn't even give him a straight answer, she began sobbing as she said "… He left Lili as bait… Lili deserve it… Lili… Lili deceived you… She doesn't derseve to be saved…"

Bell's emotion seems to be on the all-out mode as he growled and slowly lay her head down before had one of the tendrils from his body to pick up her cloak and use it as a blanket.

Bell then stood up and took a couple of sniffs around the area, seems like he's attempting to detect Canoe's trail by his body odor.

As Bell does so, Wade and Aiz finally found the two. Naturally, Aiz rushes to Lili's side to check her injuries while Wade seems to be quite impressed as he said to the young man " **Damn kid, you looked like that cheap ripoff from Spider man 3… but… you know, in a good way… and geez, it really bring out your butt MM! those curves, those… rhymthmic jiggling… no homo ok? anyway~~~ Go get 'em sexybutt, we got things under control here"**

Without another word, Bell then dashes off, on four limbs.

Wade then walk back to Aiz and Lili as he said to the injured girl " **So uh… how's life?"**

As Wade said so, a echoing scream of agony can be heard in the fat distance.

Aiz was still holding Lili as she said "Mister Wilson I don't think that is a approriate question for this kind of situation"

Wade shrugged " **Well… it's still better than 'Hi, wanna have sex?' "**

Then, more agonizing scream echoes through the misty forest along with a "OH GOD… MY RIBCAGE, YOU ATE MY RIBCAGE.."

Once again, Wade and Aiz didn't seems to care about the screaming with Wade asking Aiz " **So uh… is… Loki… you know? Single?"**

Aiz seems to understand what he's getting at as she replied "Yes she is mister Wilson…And I know what direction this conversation is going…thus my answer is this, this is something you're gonna have to tell her yourself…"

As Wade paused after hearing her answer, another series of screams eachoes through the forest once more.

Aiz then spoke again "But… I though you were married mister Wilson…with children"

Wade then pull out a piece of paper and said " **Oh yea, about that, see my wife have more than one husband…and wife, SO, to be fair, she have allowed me to date and marries only ONE more… BUT, she also made a list of whoever I am allowed to date and marry…here, check it out"** before he shows Aiz the paper, not to mention the fact that Lili was also concious enough to read it aswell.

The list reads as follow:

 _ **List of people you're allowed to elope:**_

 _ **Bea Arthur (if she ever come back to life)**_

 _ **That kid from home improvement**_

 _ **Lady Death (highly impossible)**_

 _ **Phoenix (Require my (your wife) supervision)**_

 _ **That cute feminine boy we met in Jersey during the Necrotacos monsters outbreak**_

 _ **Dolly Patton**_

 _ **A Female version of Loki, the god of mischief (not Loki transforming into one)**_

 _ **Colossus (I like his well-manner attitute)**_

 _ **My second cousin (Highly recommended, he seems to like you too)**_

Aiz and Lili didn't even know what to say as they just stares at the names on the list.

Aiz then look back at Wade and asked "Who is this… Lady Death mister Wilson?"

Wade took back the list then said " **She's like a coffin, dark, kind of empty inside, with a smooth, elegant and mysterious look…and most of all… I can never have her until I'm dead"**

Then, they saw Bell walk towards them, dragging the upper part of Canoe's body on the ground as he goes.

That scene seems to bring some joy to Lili as a faint smile appeared on her face as she saw the rolled back eyeballs and the wide open mount of a terrified man on his pale face.

As Bell dropped the corpse and walk toward Lili, crouches down and pick her up gently. Then, the suit's mouth began to open excessively wide, revealing Bell's ever caring and innocent face behind it.

The young man then asked "Are you ok Lili?"

Lili's lip began to tremble as she asked "Wh…Why? After everything Lili've done to you… Lili've lied to you… Lili've stole from you… Lili've left you there to die… Why… Why did you save LILI?"

Wade then said as he watches the two " **This should be good… sex and the forest"**

Aiz then push Wade far away from the two, giving them some space.

Back to Bell and Lili, the young just look at her for a moment before he smiled "Because you're a girl… and because I'm an idiot…".

Venom's voice then can be heard " _Gee, what a surprise…"_

Lili didn't even know what to say, she just stare at Bell for a whole minute before tears once again streams down her cheeks as she hugged him and cried out loud.

…

 _A couple of days later…_

Lili was walking among the ever busy streets of Orario,with her cloak pulled over her head and the oversized bag on her back, however, a smile is on her face instead of the gloomy,dark expression she've always had.

Suddenly, she frozes as she saw Bell stood in front of her, without his Venom suit this time. The young man then approaches her as he said "Hey uh… miss, I'm an adventurer who was looking for a supporter to work with… and you looked like a highly skilled one…"

Lili's eyes shines as brights as the stars as she saw Bell reaches his hand out to her with a warmth smile on his face and said to her "Would you… be so kind… and hire me…as your partner from now on?"

Lili's only reaction was a smile as she ran toward him.

…

At the same time, Hestia suddenly shot up from her bed, with big frown on her face and Jealousy on her back. The goddess then look around a bit before she said with a irritated voice "My Harem rival sense is tingling…"

Jealousy then spoke " _OO! OO! Can we eat her?"_

…

End of Chapter 11


	12. Not another boring interlude

_**Chapter 11: Not another boring interlude**_

 _ **Orario, at some random outdoor café…**_

"Sooo…. You stole MY dagger, OUR money… and you left MY Bell to be squash by a bunch of smelly Feral Orcs… and now you are telling me to trust you?" said Hestia with a big frown on her face as she stares at Lili, who was fidgeting on her chair the opposite direction.

Lili didn't say anything while Bell was focusing on Jealousy, who was perching over Hestia's shoulder as it extend its face toward Lili and sniffs her all over, making Lili yelped in fear.

The young man then asked "Uhhh your grace… where did … that symbiote comes from?"

Hestia then said "Well…"

…

 **(Deadpool: Presentation time!)**

The scene then once again being covered by a partially scrawned paper, then a childish like doodle of Venom began to draws itself, complete with color while Wade's voice can be heard " **Ok, see this is a Symbiote…purple,slimy and smelly… just like my decades old Kool-aid… the damn thing might aswell comes alive inside my glove compactment… broke out of my stolen Ford Pinto and went on to destroy half of New York right about now…but no worries, let those goody-goody Fantastic Four handle it, what can go wrong? AAAAnyway, despite its… weird leather fetish suit look and She-Hulk's temper, these slimy illegal aliens does have a rather… motherly… fatherly …famom…uh… damother side.."**

The Venom's doodle then starts to moves, with a cartoon like peppy walk as it whistle until it reaches a poorly drawn civillian.

Wade's voice then can be heard again " **Now, when a… certain peroid of time reaches… usually when the writers decided that they need another illegal slime to spice up their shitty story…like SOMEBODY who JUST Happening to be typing this poor fucking presentation!"**

The Venom doodle then pick up the civillian, then a speech bubbles can be seen appearing above it that reads " _Mmmmm, minimum wage worker"_ before devouring it.

The Venom doodle then repeatedly eat numerous civillian doodles while Wade's voice continues " **Any who, as you can see through this… highly detailed scientific simulator, a Symbiote just… for some god's mind blowing reasons, suddenly got PREGNANT… yes, you heard me, straight to pregnancy without sex or nuthin'…just like the Virgin Mary… my neighbor Rita Cuksooker… I think she's a art performer or some shit… that… scary old lady across the street to my hideout… well, it's either she's pregnant or just a big ol'… old people's tumor I don't know…I swear I saw it moved when she yells at me whenever I parked my car near her driveway… ANYWAY, the Symbiotes have to eat.. and I mean a LOT until…"**

The Venom doodle then puke out another symbiote in a blob-like form. A speech bubble then appears on the newborn's head that reads " _Fuck you dad!"_

Wade's voice then said " **Then, pretty much the baby is going to repeat the phases… seriously though…you aliens puberty can be pretty fucking nasty"**

 **(Deadpool: End of presentation!)**

The view then shown Bell, Lili who was staring at Hestia, who was drawing the last images as she said "Welp… that's what Venom told me anyway…"

In the background, Deadpool and Logan can be seen fighting a giant cockroach which seems to be loose from its cage, and it got Ellie in its grip.

Logan was trying to pry Ellie, who just a bit scared off of the monster's hold while Wade was aiming his RPG at the creature's stomach.

Back to Lili, Hestia and Bell. Lili suddenly stood up as she said to Hestia "Lili know she have done many bad and shameful things in the past… bu…but, she wants to redeem herself, and to repay mister Cranel, who was so kind to me despite Lili's wrong-doings…"

Lili then suddenly grab Bell's left arm and said with a form tone "Lili will put her life on the line for mister Cranel"

While Bell still confused about what's happening, Lili's statement was a clear love-battle declaration to Hestia, causing the goddess to shot up from her seat, quickly grab Bell's right arm as she glares right at Lili and said "Ohhhhohoho… Is that so… we'll see about THAT little thief… He's MINE!"

Lili responds with a slient and a determinated look in her eyes as they stares right back at Hestia's own.

Back to Wade, who have just pulled the trigger, launching the rocket right at the cockroachs stomach, right when Logan finally got Ellie to a safe distance after he slices off 4 of the creature's legs.

The rocket blown a large hole in its stomach, spilling guts and intestines everywhere. As the monster stumbling around before succumbs to its horrendous wounds, it crashes onto the wall of a nearby house, causing a large portion of the walls to fall down, exposing the interiors inside.

And within the house the monsters crashes into was a guy, around 40s or older, naked in his bathtub,with a confused look on his face as he saw his wall coming down, dragging the floor of his bathroom with it.

The man then yelped "Aw What the Hell?"

Then just as he said so, the bathtub began to slide toward the drop just ahead.

Knowing what's going to happen next, the man then said "No no no no no noooo!" before he and his tub crashed onto the street level.

The fall shatter the tub, fully exposed his body to everyone.

Only seconds after the random man's misfortune happen, the cockaroach finally fell limp on the streets, releasing a foul, nose killing stench around the premise, forcing the girls, Bell, Logan and Wade to flee the scene, leaving the whole neighborhood covered with the green-ish gas cloud and a dead monster lying around.

…

Once the gang out of the town's angry mob sight, Wade check Ellie's for injuries carefully before he said " **Now honey, what did we learned today?"**

Ellie think for a moment before she answered "That capturing colossal monsters from the Dungeon and put them in cages is a bad idea?"

Wade smiled **"No pumpkin, letting some idiot named Carter to look after the cages and keep those tree hugging hippies who kept trying to break in and release the monsters "back to their habitats"** **away is bad idea… they let some punk name Carter guard the cages and keep a look out in The Lost World and what happen? A bunch of angry Veggie Dinos run amok, squash and spears a bunch of poachers… and that guy who was only remembered for his 10 minutes role as Lucifer got his ass eaten by a bunch of tiny raptors that looked like a bunch of crazed Pokemon Go players after spending 5 days in the Central Park, looking for a freaking Pikachu…"**

Logan sniffs his arms before he growled at Wade "Oh thanks a lot Wade, now I smelled like YOU on a Sunday morning"

Wade shrugged " **Didn't you always?"**

Logan then look at Ellie before he took a deep exhale and calm himself down, since slicing Wade into bits and watches as he heals himself up right in front of a little girl will definitely leave her with some serious trauma dramas to deal with.

Hestia then look at Wade before she asked "So uh.. mister Wade, how's… eh… things?"

Wade shrugged " **Oh you know, same old same old, woke up, get dress, eat,kills monsters, then went back to sleep… things have been pretty stale lately… so Loki suggest that I find some… part time job to… hone in my social skills and tries earning some money without killing anything for a change… Anyway, I tried fisherman…ended up killing my boss by accident…"**

Wade then continues as he put his mask back on " **Next I tried Alchemist assistant… it's kinda cool until' I eh… kind of eh… dematerialized my instructor…by accident…"**

The others's stares become weired out as Wade continues " **Then, I tried to be a blacksmith… Hephaestus still pestering me about the fact that I… eh… purposely blew up one of her refinery and…kindddd of setting 5 whole neighborhood blocks on fire in the process… Hey I was doing her a favor, there was a big ass spider colony in her basement, you should have seen them, they were laying eggs and having an orgy like it's a fucking Woodstock concert… Someone gotta do something!"**

Luckily, Hestia was quick to cover Ellie's ears before she can hear the full content of Wade's rant.

Wade then said " **Finally, I've found a job that I haven't screwed up on after 2 hours of work… a hair sweeper at a local Barbershop, I tell ya, the old dudes who hangs around there is what makes everyday works worth while for me"**

The scene the shown a rather humble, but cozy barbershop lies in the working class folks neigborhood, and many voices inside can be heard.

Inside was 4 old men, a human, an elf,he a wooden leg and an eyepatch, a Werewolf with a massive set of pristine white beard, sitting by the window next to his walking cane, and a bear halfbreed,with a set of lincoln beard and a newspaper in his hands. The four was talking to each other while Wade was sweeping the hair on the floor into a plastic bag as he listen to their conversation.

The human, who was trimming the hair of a young hobbit as he says "So, that punk told me that Marcellus The Gutripper ain't shit agaisnt that… that new comer Krieg the Wall in the ring, can you believe this shit?"

The 3 other old men all grunted before the elf spoke,with a slight Jersey accent "Ughhh kids these days with their god damn flashy, fairy looking fighters… all look but no real punches… I mean, they spend more money in making their entrance looked like it's the Orario's National holiday parade while they fights like a bunch of lil' school girls slapping the living puberty out of each other…"

The old werewolf then said "Oh how I missed the good ol' days… Marcellus, Arthur Destructur, Todd Rango an…"

As he mentioned the name Todd Rango, the Bear halfbreed spoke "I though his name was Mug-fixer Kali"

The human then spoke "Todd Rango was his real name… he changed to Mug-fixer Kali, fits him just fine if you ask me, remember that one match when he broke Syke Fyson's jaw in just ONE punch to the face? Never have I seen a match ends in just 20 seconds flat… God damn he even gave Fyson lifetime lisp from that ONE fucking punch… I'm telling you, back in MY days, he's the definition of a bad motherfucker… "

The bear halfing then reply "Still, now that I heard his real name… I think he should have stick with it, I mean what the heck? Mug-fixer Kali? The fuck does that even mean?"

The werewolf then said "Now wait a minute, wait a minute, what happens to personal rights? This is a free city god dammit, and if a man decide to call himself Mug-fixer Kali, or Stinkbag Mcnugget, Brick Lester…or-or-or-or even Susan Popcornfield, Let him!"

The bear halfling shrugs "If his ma' calls him Todd, Imma call him Todd"

After while, the scene then shown Wade, who have just finished sweeping the shop and is listenting the old men having a what seems to be a heated argument about who's the best fighter in Orario's history while eating some sort of dried pickle.

The human spoke with a rather irritated and loud voice "Ya'll must be out of your Gad' damn mind if you don't think Zion Lou is the greatest fighter who ever lived"

Then there were two youngsters entered the shop, the human turns to them and said "I'll be with chu' boys in a minute"

The old human then turn back to his friends and said "He beat Mug-Fixer, Krieg, Kastle Steel by KNOCK OUT, KNOCK OUT, Kastle Steel is the only motherfucker who do the knocking out around the ring before Zion Lou entered the business"

The old elf then spoke "What about Stoney Marxiano?"

The human the spread both his hand for a split second before he hang them loose and said "Oh There they go, There THEY Go, everytime we talk about ring fighting, an ELF have to pull Stoney Marxiano out of their silky stinkin ass! Stoney Marxiano this, Stoney Marxiano that, Let me tell you somethin', Stoney Marxiano was truly impressive,no doubt, but compare to Zion Lou, Stoney Marxiano AIN'T SHIT!"

The elf then said "He did whoop Zion's ass"

The human seems shocked as he look to the werewolf, just to hear him says "Yea he did whoop Zion Lou's ass"

The human then snap back "Zion Lou was 275 years old when he fought Stoney, they have to drag him out of the retirement resort to fight this punk"

The werewolf then said "I don't know how old he was when he fought Stoney but he got his ass whooped, horribly!"

The human quickly replied "He lied about his age, he ALWAYS did, One time, Finny Sinestro walks in here, sat on THIS chair before I asked him "Ey Finny, how old did Zion Lou told chu' he was?" You know what he said? "525 years old, 525 YEARS OLD!"

The bear halfling wave his hand at the human before he said "Mannn you ain't never meet no Finny Sinestro…"

The human stares at his friends for a moment before he point his finger at the Bear halfling and shouted "FUCK YOU!"

Then he points at the Elf and shouted "FUCK YOU!"

Finally he points at the werewolf and shouted "AND FUCK YOU!"

Then, he turns toward the youngsters with a smile and asked "Who's next?"

…

The scene then switches back to present time when Wade and Ellie have just arrived back at the Twilight house after parting with Bell's group.

Once inside, Wade saw Loki, who was leaning agaisnt one of the stone collunms that leads toward the main lobby with her eyes slightly open and aims at him.

Wade then said to Ellie " **Pumpkin, could you eh… give us a moment?"**

Ellie nodded with a innocent smiles before she ran upstairs to her room. Leaving the two alone.

Wade then said with a playful tone " **Soooo, what's up… eh… doc?"**

Loki then slowly moves her eyes away and said "Look I… I've been thinking…"

Wade cuts her off " **About us go freaky on your bed?"**

The goddess quickly retort "NO! … It's been a very… boring weekend for me… the others have their own agenda, even my beloved Aizu… and It's very pointless to be drinking and getting fucked up alone on a Friday night… so…"

Wade then said " **Soooo you want to ask me on a drinking date?"**

The goddess slightly blushes as she slowly nodded "Yes…I want to ask you on a date… BUT NO FUNNY BUSINESS YOU HEAR? IF you so much of lay a finger on my body, so help me, I'll make sure not even that fancy regenerating power of yours can save you when I'm throught, GOT that?"

Wade then said " **Hey, no problem babe, I prefer us to take it slow too, save our strenght for when it's GO time… SO, which miserable pub is gonna have to put up with us tonight?"**

Loki then said "Mia's place…"

Before Wade can say anything, Loki quickly continues "… Just, be there at 7…" before she walks back to her room.

Wade stood there for a moment before he starts skipping like a kid as he said " **Awwww Yisssss, Sex with a Goddess tonight!"**

…

 _ **Later that night, at Mia's place…**_

Wade and Loki was sitting at the same table where her and her Familia met the merc himself for the first time. The goddess herself have just chug down a shot glass before she asked the man in the red suit and his mask removed in front of her "Tell me Wade… what kind of… job did you do in your world?"

Wade leaned agaisnt his chair and said " **I'm a merc… simply put, people pay me to fuck other people up…It's tough work but boy do I get the job done…with only smalll collateral damages percentage, two burnt down city block, a quarter of the Empire State building, that… 9/12 incident with a Helicarrier,SHIELD still got my ass under surveillance 'cause of that , … half of Detroit, The Statue of Liberty's nose, The President's Limosine, most of Chinatown andddd 5 childrens playgrounds…"**

Loki open one of her eyes before she said "Seems like you're pretty infamous wherever you are…"

Wade then pick up his shot glass and said " **Yep, it's comes with this package in front of ya… wait til' I get my hands on the prick who wrote my miserable life…"**

Loki seems confused "Writer?"

Wade quickly replied " **It's not important… But enough about me, How the fuck can a boyish beauty like you still single?"**

Loki frowned "Let's not make me kill you on a Friday night out… especially on Happy Hour…"

…

Half an hour later, Loki can be seen rambling on about her love life, judging by her gestures and the tone of her voice, she's slightly drunk.

Wade listen to the goddess intently with his chin rest on one of his hand as she said "…And THEN, once again… He noticed MY CHEST, MY DAMN FLAT AS A IVORY IN-LAY TABLE CHEST… next thing I know, we never have a second date… I'm telling you, meennnn are a bunch of pathetic… greedy, horny boobs loving pigs… I say "hi" to them with my eyes lock on to theirs while THEY have their eyes lock on to my chest… as if they're checking if I.. pass their Big-Jiggling-Juggs quota… it's disgusting!"

Meanwhile, in Wade's mind, he seems to be in one of his usual otherworldly fantasies mode as it projecting directly to his eyes. The rambling, half drunk Loki in reality look and act completely different in Wade's view, she was looking at him with a lusty smile, blushed cheeks and both hands cupping her own flat as a plasma TV chest while saying seductively " _You know Wade, my… chest have been feeling rather… strange since the moment I saw you… it kept getting… hot… oh so hot and itchy…the same as every other parts of my body…"_

Back in reality, Wade still going "Uh-huh, uh-huh,uh huh…" at her every rambles.

As Loki says "THEN, I though, you know, maybe this guy isn't like the rest… until…"

The view then switches to Wade's fantasy once more, with his version of Loki, now slowly climbs on the table and slowly crawls toward him seductively like a cat as she said " _You're so cruel Wade… I can't keep my composure whenever you're around… do you know how many nights I have to… pleasure myself to sleep…screaming your name into the night… Now, seeing you right here, right in front of me, just… mere feets away from my… aching,hungry body… I just couldn't take it anymore…"_

Then, Wade's version of Loki slowly goes for her top and pull it up, slowly revealing whats inside. When she fully took it off, what's in front of Wade's face is a shining ray of light, the merc look at the source of the light, which obviously her bare chest for a moment before he said " **Oh Sweet Strawberry dipped with chocp flakes sprinkled Jebus"**

Wade's version of Loki then gently grab both side of Wade's face before she smiled " _What are you waiting for Wade? Dig in"_

However, in reality, Loki was shaking Wade's face as she said angrily "EY! EY Wade! You listening to me? WADE! POOL!"

Her shouting eventually got the merc out of his trance. The guy just awkwardly look at the real Loki, who still look drunk and pissed before he spoke on instinct " **Uh… sorry, I eh… I was distract by your nake…I mean, beauty…"**

Loki the belches before she sat back down and said "But you know… you're the first…and probably the only man I've ever met that… eh... that… bleargagagegrjejahag….*snores* "

The goddess seems to have fell asleep before she can finish her sentence.

…

On the way back to the Twilight house, Wade was carrying Loki on his back while singing the infamous rickroll song quietly.

As Wade was busy singing, Loki slowly tighten her grip around Wade's neck as she nudges herself closer to his body with a faint smile on her lips as the two walks among the silent streets of Orario.

…

The scene then switches to New York City, where an intense battle agaisnt a colossal purple blob-like monster are in progress. The monster seems to have a Ford Pinto stuck to its body as it wreck havok around the cityscapes while The Fantastic Four, the Avengers and the X-men are doing their best to evacuate the citizens and neutraulize the monster.

…

End of Chapter 11


	13. Cranel Balboa I

_**Chapter 12: Cranel Balboa I**_

 _ **Streets of Orario… weeks after Lili's recruitment**_

" **Hi there, I'm Wade Winston Wilson, and THIS… Is Jackass"** said Wade, with a proud and excited voice as he raised an M60 machine gun with one hand and tighten his grip on what seems to be a lease of some sort with his other hand.

The scene quickly zoom out to shown Wade, sitting on top of Wolverine's back, who have a mouth gag and lease attached onto his face. There is definitely something wrong with Logan, as he does look angry, with foams coming out of his mouth, but he would never let Wade do something such as get down on four limbs and let the merc sat on and a steed out of him.

Wade the pointed his machine gun toward what seems to be a small army of thugs,armed to the teeth, whoever they are, they're obviously not here to talk. The merc then shouted " **ONWARD! My trusty STEEEDD"** before he kick Logan in his left thigh.

Not only did Logan didn't slice Wade into 5mm thick layers of steaks, he actually responded by growling just like a real life wolverine would before he charges toward the thugs, running on his arms and legs, with the talkative merc on his back spraying hot lead all around.

Logan himself was also in on the action as he pops his claws before he lunged on top of a nearby thug and rapidly slashes his torso until the bastard's inard like heart, ribcages and kidney can be seen clearly.

Wade on the other hand get off of his ride before taking the lease off and slapping Logan in his butt and said " **Seek 'em boy!"**

As Wolverine roared and charge toward the terrified adventurers on four limbs, Wade was whistling as he loots the bodies scathering all over the city streets.

As the chaos continues, the city's resident seems to have somewhat used to Wade's presence and reputations as they not only left their windows open, but they even carry on with their everyday activities nonchalantly as if there wasn't a small genocide happening right in front of their houses. One of the thugs servered arms can be seen flew right into a random house, followed by a bang, then a calm casual male voice can be heard "Honey get the broom… Wade's at it again"

One of the middle aged resident can be seen poke her head out from her window, wearing only a seductive black lace lingerie on her body and a irritated expression on her face as she yelled at the merc "HEY WOULD YOU KEEP IT DOWN WADE? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M CHEATING ON MY HUSBAND WITH THE MILKMAN HERE!"

Wade then look up as he said " **Oops, sorry Mrs Penelope! Say, I thought you were with that Chimney cleaner last week"**

The woman shrugged "Meh, his wife found out and killed him… Oh god, Oh god, right there baby right there, use that tongue, YES! … anyway, they come they go, what can you do?"

Wade then said " **Wouldn't your husband found out?"**

The woman shrugs once more "Eh, he's busy fucking my co-worker… MALE co-worker"

Wade stares at her for a bit, as he does so, a scream can be heard from the chaos behind him "OH GOD MY KIDNEY! I CAN SEE MY KIDNEY!" before he said awkwardly " **Okk… eh… I guess it's ok then?"**

The woman then asked "Say, do you have any woman- Yes Yes Yes! Faster faster! Use your WHOLE FIST Baby I can take it! … anyway Wade, you're still single?"

Wade then scratches the back of his mask as he replied " **Well… you could say I'm… heading somewhere HOT with a certain Goddess"**

The woman then purred "Oooooo who's the lucky holy being?"

Wade proudly replied " **Loki!"**

The woman seems surprised as she said "Loki? Gosh… I never thought that true love still exist… Welp, I wish you two the best… Oh I'm Coming, I'm Coming!" before she fell back inside. A brief moment later, her voice can be heard again "LOKI?Really? … WOAH, I ain't done with you yet hot stuff! Pull that pants BACK DOWN!"

…

 _ **Later that afternoon… Twilight House…**_

" **Gooddddd afternoon bitches!"** shouted Wade as he kick the door open and casually struts in, with a bag full of reward money on one hand and a gold plated bastard sword mounted on his back,seems to be his trophy from the gang leader's corpse. There was an arrow stuck where his left eye should be, a dagger still stuck in his crotch, his right hand is not where it suppose to be and his pants seems to be missing, save for his boxers,which still miraculously intact and pristine clean.

Following him was Wolverine, still under whatever the spell that was put on him. Wade quickly scratch Logan's head as he said playfully " **You did Guud today Wolvie! Yesh shu did Yesh shu did! Who's the guuud hairy stinking Wolverine? Who's the guud Wolverine? YOU ARE!"**

The feral transferred Logan actually seems to enjoyed the head scratch as he rapidly taps his left foot on the floor.

As the pets and owner bonding scene play on, Riveria, Tione and Tiona was also there to witness it, with Tione said "Mister Wilson, that is a very rude way to treat your friend"

Wade replied " **Oh c'mon, it's not like I'm the one who says "** _ **Hey Logan, see that suspicious glowing orbs flying around, with a menacing aura surrounding it? Touch it and see what happen"**_

Riveria then said "But you did shove him toward that Trickster Orb… And as a friend mister Wilson, I urge you to let me dispel the curse, it's for your own safety…"

Wade then begged " **Awwwww can I just pleasseee keep him for like… 2 more days? I think I can teach him how to fetch my slippers"**

Riveria then said "Mister Wilson, I don't believe misstress Loki would be very… pleased at Dinner tonight with mister Logan constantly humping her leg… That wouldn't be… Good for your… impression on her would it?"

Wade seems disappointed as he sighs **"Alright, alright change him back…party pooper~~~"**

Riveria then point her staff at Wolverine, close her eyes and mumbling the spellwords before a beam of light shot right out of her staff and hit Logan right between the eyes.

Logan seems to be a bit disoriented for a brief moment before he slowly stood up and look at Wade with his teeth grinding agaisnt each other. He was obviously furious.

Wade seems nervous as he asked Riveria " **Uhhh… You sure you used the right spell Gandalfina? He looked… more pissed off than usual…"**

Riveria then said "As a matter of fact I did mister Wilson…. But see the thing about those Trickster Orbs is that every transferent curses they put on their victims works like this:.."

The view then slowly shift to Wade, who was awkwardly looking at the angry Logan in front of him while the words that comes out of Riveria's mouth were interpreted by Wade's ears as _"Blah, blah blah blah bleh bluh bluh bleh blah blah blah blah bluh bluh woop woop woop blublublublubluh…"_

As Riveria went on with her explanation, Wade then though to himself as he look at Wolverine " _ **Gee… it's been like… 20…or 35 issues and like… 4 non-canon one shots since I seen his face this close…God it's uglier than I remembered it… Is that… is that a piece of brocolli stuck between his teeth?How long have it been in there? … And look at that chin, it's like a pair of hairy,swollen nuts…and Oh my fake American Express credit card registered with the name Senor Wade Homero Sanchez! Is that… is that his NOSE HAIRS? Looks like some shit that came right out of a Stephen King's novel… Heck I bet one look at this guys nose and King could came up with a new horror flick called "Beyond the haunted Nostrils" ... God this is worse than looking at Al in that V shaped bikini from Borat"**_

As Wade finishes with his inner thoughs, Riveria's word began to sounds normal again in his ears as she said "… In shorts mister Wilson, the victims of those curses are still fully aware of what happen around them, it's just that they cannot control their own body actions long as the curse still take effects"

Wade seems to be getting the picture as he swung his head toward Riveria and asked **"Wait… so you mean…"**

Riveria then nodded "Yes, I'm afraid he was fully conscious when you teach him to pee in the yard…"

Wade then asked " **What about…"**

The elven replied "When you told him to fetch that live hand grenade that costed him half of his face and 1 whole hour of regeneration? Yes…"

Wade paused for a moment before he asked sheepishly " **What about…"**

Riveria then said "Yes…he knew… even I think it's disgusting… truly disgusting…"

Then, Wade can feel the hot air slamming into the back of his neck, followed by a chilling angry growl before the scene quickly cuts to black.

…

 _ **Twilight House, dinner time…**_

"Okkk dad! Open wide, here comes the choo choo train~~~!" Said Ellie as she feed a large chunk of steak on a fork to Wade, who happily chews on it and said " **Meh… need more sauce"**

However, as the view zoom out, it shows Wade, most of him anyway were chewing on another chunk of steak being fed to him by his daughter. Seems like in his moment of pent up rage, Logan have dismembered all of Wade's limbs, leaving only his torso and head intact.

The others can't help but look at him with a grossed out look, while Aiz just casually eats her dish.

Wade seems to noticed the stares as he said " **Hey Riv, you got any spell that can help my arms grows back? I got an itch on my right ass cheek… and its KILLING ME!"**

As he said so, Ellie said "Here dad, another bite, with extra sauce~~~! Say ahhhhh" and fed him another chunk of steak.

Riveria then said "Unfortunately mister Wilson, that type of magic is… beyond my skill and knowledge… Beside… I can see your limbs are growing back…"

Wade seems disappointed as he said " **Oh C'mon, you can nuke an entire field of monsters for like…1 percent of your MP yet you can't even help a guy scratch his itchy spot?"**

Riveria smiled softly "Look on the bright side mister Wilson… you got such a wonderful, caring young lady for a daughter who doesn't care how many arms or legs you got on your body…and… some other… admirers…"

As the elf said so, she briefly dash her eyes toward Loki, who was smiling with a faint blush on her cheeks as she witness the, awkwardly cute father and daughter bonding moment in front of her.

Bate seems to notices it as he look at Loki, then at Wade, then back to Loki for a total 5 times before he grunted "Oh you have GOTTA be fucking kidding me! Her Grace? AND THAT PIECE OF…"

Bate's sentence was cut short when Riveria shot a beam of freeze spell at him, frozen him on impact.

Loki shows no sign that she know what's going on around her while Tiona said to Riveria "Nice call Riv"

Riveria casually said "swearing and openly insulting someone in front of young childrens are highly unacceptable… even for indivinduals like…Bate…"

Finn smiled as he look at Wade screaming " **Too Hot, Too Hot!"** while Ellie panickingly said "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" before he said "… I think I can… kinda see why… she likes him…"

Tiona then turns to Aiz and asked "Soooo, Aiz, where have you been today? You look… kinda different, you're… oh my Loki, you're smiling… are you ok?"

Aiz then look at Tiona for a bit before she shyly answered "Oh eh… I was… helping mister Wilson trains that… young boy…"

Everyone seems slightly surprised as they stared at her, while Aiz continued "You see I… I feel like… I own him an apology… and I… I feel like the best way for me to apologize is to help him improve his skills… I see much potential in him on the day he fought the Silverback, and I think it would a good thing if I give him a hand tapping into those potentials…"

The princess then look at Wade and said "Mister Wilson asked that I let him take part in Cranel's training… In fact, we've been training him for the last few weeks, mister Wilson's method can be a bit… unconventional and… quite risky but… they were… helpful and rather entertaining…"

 **(Deadpool: Training Montage! Hit that Rocky theme!)**

 _ **Cardio/ speed improvement trainning…**_

Bell, Aiz and Wade met at a rather secluded and spacious grassfield, with Bell wearing Wade's X-Force uniform and his armor over it.

Wade was busy checking what seems to be a live animal cage nearby,which concern the young man as he asked nervously "Uh… mister Wilson… what…what's that cage for? And…and what's this piece of meat I have to tape on my armor anyway?"

Wade casually dial the combination on the lock as he said " **Your motivation…aside from the song in the background…"**

Aiz bluntly replied "What…song mister Wilson?"

Wade shrugged " **Oh I forgot, you can't hear it…anyway, say hello… to Veronica, the cutest, fastest Dead Raptor…kidnapped straight from the 4** **th** **floor's secret Labyrint…"**

As Wade said so, he open the cage, and what walk out was a creature with the same height as an adult human and highly resemblence a Deinonychus dinosaur, but with an additional furry mohawk on its forehead and small spikes that runs among its spine.

The creature look around in confusion before it gave out a chilling shriek once it noticed the humans in front of it.

Wade then pat the dino's head and said " **Plain and simple kid, it chase you, you run…Now I know what you're thinking, "why is this horribly disfigured hunk making you run away from a viscious Dead Chicken as part of your trainning?" See you'll never really push yourself to the limit until you know for damn sure your life is depending on what you're doing… like running from a Raptor, disarming a timed detonation version of the Tsar Bomba warhead… thank god I pick the right wire or else I'll have to explain to Fury where did the entire Eastcoast disappeared to…, being chased by a mob of Jehovah witnesses, being chased by the IRS, being chased by your wife after you're home at 5 in the morning and decline anniversary sex with her… ANYWAY, let's get started!"**

As Bell and Aiz awkwardly look at him, Wade climbs onto Veronica's back before he pointed at the meat on Bell's armor then said " **Seek im!"**

The moment he said so, Veronica shrieked and charge right at the meat on Bell's armor, prompting the young to turns and run as fast as his legs allows him, while Aiz silently followed behind just in case the Wade lose control of his pet. Meanwhile, the main theme from the movie Rocky Balboa can be heard playing in the background.

Bell was yelling in panic as he began to run faster and faster, which Aiz quickly took noticed as she though to herself "Incredible… he've only been running for half an hour…and his speed have already signigficantly increased…"

However, Veronica was also determined to get the piece of meat on his armor, thus the dino began to put more work on its hinged legs, boosting its speed.

It wasn't long until Veronica catches up to Bell and lunged on top of him, pinning the young man on the ground and seize the piece of meat.

As Bell quickly get away from the beast, who was nomming on its trophy, Wade pat its side and said " **That's a good girl!"** before he took out another piece of meat and said to Bell " **That was some Forrest Gump quality running kid… Again!"**

Bell's face went pale as he said "Oh please no…"

 _ **Combat training…**_

The Rocky themes continues as Bell can be seen clashing wooden swords with Aiz, who decided to teach him the art of sword combat, with Wade being tied to a nearby tree while she grunted with a bored voice " **Oh geez, It's not like I'm just gonna let you fight those mini Golems to the death!"**

 _ **Willpower, focus training…**_

The song continues loudly as the scene shows Wade, with a thermal vision goggles on his head, releasing a rather funny looking monster, which resembled a gecko with a derpy looking face and a tounge just dangling outside its mouth and stood on 2 legs, it's posture was similar to a hunchback, not mention the scales on its skin constantly shifting colors tones with a slow pace.

Wade then said to Bell " **Ok kid, meet Kool-Aid… I could have swore its skin was purple when I found it but that's not important… this hippy looking lizard can turns invisible to humans eyes… remember that place where you fought those Orcs? Turns out these guys were a rare type of monsters that only spawn during midnight… Look don't ask what I was doing in the Dungeon at 12 AM, you have your own references, I got mine…"**

That statement only made Bell gave Wade another weired out look.

The merc then said " **Anyway, you'll be fighting this thing while it's cloak itself from you… Don't worry I got this goggle to help me keep track of it in case it decided to turns this WWE fight into a UFC fight… nowww… BEGIN!"** before he shot the chain on Kool-Aid's neck with a sawn off shotgun.

The creature quickly look at Bell for a brief moment before it quickly disappeared.

Bell took a deep breath before he hold up his wooden sword and watches his surrounding.

On Wade's side, he put on the thermal goggle before switching it on. However, all the merc saw through the lenses was Bell's heat signature, seems like Kool-Aid's species cloaking ability can also get pass thermal imaging dectetion methods.

It wasn't long before Bell felt a fist landed on his left cheek, it wasn't a devastating attack but no where near painless. The young man back away for a moment before he felt 3 punches landed on his stomach then a left hook, right hook and an uppercut that knocked him off of his feet.

Bell then swung his sword aimlessly around but fail to land any hit, not even a lucky one.

Wade on the other hand was sweating under his mask since he can't see a damn thing due to the creature's advance natural cloaking ability. The merc then slowly reaches for the Mossberg 500 on his back before he stopped when Aiz asked him "You can't see it either can you?" with a disappointed tone.

Wade slowly nodded his head, very slowly. That was all the infos Aiz needed as she draw her sword and dash forward.

With a swift dashing slash that seemingly only cuts through air, the trio can hear a clear growl before Kool-Aid reappared, with its body being cut in half, both parts were lying on the ground, still wiggling with life.

Aiz then help Bell up and said to Wade "Mister Wilson…perharps next time, you let me take care of all combat trainning…including this one, please?"

Wade took off his goggle and shrugged nonchalantly " **Sounds good to me"**

The scene then shows many montage of Bell trainings, still with the Rocky Theme playing in the background. It shows how he get better and better day after day, until it shows Bell actually managed to outrun Veronica, making the dino gave up once its stamina runs out. He even managed to withstand and counter more of Aiz's lighting fast attacks before she knocks him down.

The scene then shows Bell,who was running around Orario, wearing only the X-Force uniform with the kind of speed that was impossible for a Lv 1 adventurer, not to mention that the young man shows no signs of tiring as a smile of confident bloom on his face. He then raised both of his hands triumphantly as he runs.

…

 _ **Meanwhile …**_

On the very top of the Orario tower, Freya was observing Bell's morning jog with a smile on her face as she said "My oh my… he just kept melting my heart every single passing day…"

Then, her personal guard, the scary hybrid appears from the room's dark corner as he said "Forgive me for asking but… why are you paying attention to that… little nobody?"

Freya who still have her eyes on Bell replied "Why? Because nobody… and I mean nobody have ever made me turns my head before… I have always been the one who made heads turns wherever I go… He's such a beautiful little human…with soo..oh soo much powers hidden underneath that silk-like beauty…"

The guard then slightly gritted his teeth with irritation. Freya however seems to sense it as she turns around and chuckled "…Oh dear me, Ottar… are you jealous?"

The man,whose name was Ottar replied "Your grace, why would I be jealous of that little farmboy?"

Freya smiled "Oh… I don't know… maybe because that farmboy stole your goddess's attention away from you perharps?" as she slowly struts toward him.

Ottar just look at her for a moment before he said "Your Grace I would be grateful if you stop this childish tirade…"

Freya's devious smile widened as she said "Aww I have been neglecting you aren't I? Tell you what, you help me with this one task…and I'll have a pinic with you…how's that sound?"

Ottar briefly look away before he said "What's the task…your grace?"

Freya then pinches his cheek as she purred playfully "Dawww You're soo cute when you're jealous, you big ol' grumpy hybrid you... anywho, there's a certain… monster that I needed you to… relocate… can you do that for me?"

…

 **End of chapter 12**


	14. Cranel Balboa II

_**Chapter 13: Cranel Balboa II : Director's cut**_

 **(Deadpool: Seriously? Director's cut? What 'chu cut off? Some boring corny convos between the boy and his thousands of years old natural-king-size-milk-sacks packing divine girlfriend? A full minute of him staring at the setting sun, having a bunch of flashback that ain't nobody got time for? … Anyway, the last chapter was far more horrible than when I hear Stephanie Meyer announced ANOTHER Twilight series… Jesus, does the director who does those films have any self-respect? Well beside the fact that they made trillions just for filming a bunch of sissy looking "werewolves" that looked like an Indian version of Magic Mike, some chick whose face are stiffer than my Puss Wrecker 2000 on my anniversary night with Shiklah, and a bunch of walking disco balls who call themselves.. "vampires", really… Shiklah insist that we watch the final chapter, HIGHLY agaisnt my will…she ended up burning down the whole theater when that whole fucking fight scene was just a god damn vision, I've never thought I could lover her more than I do now… ANYWHO, back to the main subject, YOU SIR, are losing your touch, and I mean FAST… I mean, that training montage could've been written by Bizzaro, …what happen THIS TIME? Lazy? Retardus-infinus syndrome finally kicks in?"**

 _ **Orario, Dungeon…**_

"See, I told you you look much better with the hood off" said Bell as he removed the hood that have always been covering Lili's head, revealing a new long hairstyle that she've been growing out.

The young man also notices that as he said "And hey, you look beautiful with long hair" with a warm smile.

Lili just blushes as she shyly said "Oh uh…Yo…you really think so mister Cranel?"

However, as the scene zoom closer to her forehead, her inner though can be heard shouting excitedly " _YISSSSSS! Lili KNEW he'll like it… now all she needs is to find a way to enlarge her chest…that way… she'll be able to win mister Cranel from that.. that cranky Goddess… Hmmm… now which undies should Lili wear tomorrow? Pink? Nah… it's too girly even for Lili… maybeee… meh, she'll decide later…Oh that reminds Lili, she got to returns those Squirrel Girl comics to mister Pool…"_

As her inner thoughs reaches that part, the view quickly zoom out, showing her and Bell, already inside the Dungeon, battling their way through the incoming hordes of monsters, seems like her body and instinct was doing all the fighting while her brain focusing on her inner thoughts.

Lili seems surprised as she though to herself while she raised her wrist crossbow and fired an arrow right into the left eye of a Goblin " _gee… Lili is better than she thought… hmmm… did Lili left her stove on when she go out this morning?"_

As she though so, Lili dodged a club attack from a Goblin,she then quickly kick it in its nuts and shot an arrow right between its eye, killing it.

Meanwhile, Bell was decimating a small group of Goblins by shooting a barrage of Fire Bolt from his hand toward them. The bolts made short work of the low level monsters by turning them into ashes upon impact. As their ashes fell to the ground, a bunch of loots including gold rings, bracelets and other jewelries pops out from the ash piles and hit the floor.

Lili wasted no times as she dashes toward the loot and snatches them while Bell was covering for her from afar with his Fire Bolt spell.

…

After an hour, Lili and Bell finally reaches the floor where he never got killed by the pack of Orcs. As the pair walks in, they quickly notices something was wrong. The floor was filled with dead bodies, both humans and monsters alike, body parts and weapons, big to small, high to low qualities were all over the place.

Lili quickly backup a couple of steps behind Bell as she asked "Wha…what happened here?"

Bell quickly draws his Hestia Dagger and said "I don't know but it does NOT look good in any way…"

The young man then slowly advances forward while Lili cautiously follows behind.

As the passes a couple of tree lines, Ottar, Freya's personal guard quietly passes them from behind the curtain of mist. The man gave the pair a brief glance before he proceed toward the exit.

As he walks, Ottar reaches for his satchel bag and took out what looked like a small crystal orb and raises it in the air. Once he done so, the orb began to glow faintly and levitate upward.

It then began flying high above Bell and Lili's head, far out of their sight of detection as it follows them.

The Hybrid then said "Looks like my work here is done… If you know what's good for you,boy… run…" quietly before he exited the floor.

Back on the ground, a low,spine chilling growl made both Lili and Bell stopped in their tracks.

Both seems to recognize the sound as Lili said with fear "Wha…but…but.. that's…"

Bell can't even move as the mist in front of him was swept away by a powerful swing, revealing what's behind it, a minotaur, and it looked as angry as ever.

The young man gulped as he said "How did…how did a Minotaur get here?"

The monster on the other hand looked at its two prey and roared as it proceed toward them,carrying a gigantic War Hammer in its arm.

Before the two can do anything, the beast suddenly leap right toward them with its axe raised above its head, ready to strike.

Lili and Bell quickly dodge out of the way. However, as the beast's body and hammer smashes onto the ground, the impact created a shockwave that send both flying toward a nearby series of boulders.

Bell quickly got up and ran toward Lili, who doesn't seems to be moving.

As the young man help her up, his eyes widened when he saw blood coming out of her forehead, she must have hit her head when she fell down. He then asked "Lili! You ok?"

The girl nodded "Yes… Lili's ok… she can still fight…"

Lili then pointed her crossbow at the beast who was standing in the small crater its attack have just created,attempting to shoot it, but was stopped by Bell.

The young man then carry her on his back and run toward the exit,with the angry Minotaur hot on their tail.

Once they reached the exit, Bell put Lili down,look back at the incoming beast behind them for a moment before he look back at Lili and said "Lili… get out of the Dungeon…" as he took out some sorts of potion and gave them to her.

Lili still look confused as she asked worryingly "Wha..wa…what do you mean… Lili… Lili don't understand"

Bell then said "These are stats buff potions… the monster above this floor are far weaker than the ones in this floor… just drink these and they'll boost your general personal stats, you'll make it out of the Dungeon in no time…"

Lili seems to slowly understand what's going on, but the girl still seems to be in denial as she replied "Bu…But… why aren't you coming mister Cranel?"

Bell then look back at the monster, who was only meters from them before he answered "I've been running away for far too long… This ends here…"

Lili's eyes began to water as she said "Mister Cranel what are you…"

Bell suddenly shouted at her "JUST GET OUT OF HERE DAMMIT!"

Lili back away from being startled, prompting him to lower his voice "I'll be fine… just… go… I've promised to protect you… just… just let me do my job…"

 **(Deadpool: Coorrrrrrrnyyyyyyyy~~~~~~~~~~~~!)**

The moment he finished his sentence, Bell felt an indescribable pain on his left arm before he was sent flying into a nearby wall, right in front of Lili's eyes.

The minotaur have hit him with its hammer, the immense strength of the attack shatter Bell's right pauldron upon impact.

The beast then look at Lili, who was frozen with fear before raising its hammer, attempting to smash her.

Lili can only closes her eyes and wait for her demise. However, as the monster was about to drop the hammer on her, a big fire bolt rammed right into its face and exploded, causing the beast to took a couple of steps back as it place on hand on its face and growled.

Lili then look at the direction the bolt comes from to find Bell, who was gasping heavily as he yells at her "GET OUT LILI! NOW!"

Lili look at him for a moment before she dashes to the exit while she shouted back "LILI WILL LOOK FOR HELP!KEEP YOURSELF AWAY FROM IT MISTER CRANEL!"

Bell then turns around, facing the monster with his Hestia dagger readied. He then gave out a loud battlecry before he lunge toward it.

…

Meanwhile, at the floor just above it, a bunch of monsters was running away and getting torn to bits from the barrge of leads projectiles, coming from the handheld variant of a Browning 30 Caliber Machine gun on Wade's hand.

As the merc, followed by Finn,Aiz, Riveria, the Tione twins, Bate, Lefiya and Raul advances forward, passing a field of dead monsters, Riveria asked him as she looked at his left hand, holding on to the barrel of the machingun while wearing an oven mitt as a heat protection "Mister Wilson… What's the point of bringing your swords if you're not gonna use them?"

Wade shrugged as he fire another burst " **Gee you remind me of my math teacher you know that? Fine… one melee onslaught coming up… make it a good one yer stinkin' virgin"**

 **(Deadpool: Jesus really? Is that suppose to be funny?)**

The merc then drop the machine gun and the over mitt before he draws his katanas and charge toward the monsters ahead.

Once he reached the closest monster, which was a humanoid giant rat, Wade stab it in the stomach before he pull the sword downward until the sword exited the creature's body, created a horrific C section cut, causing the beast's instestines to drop to the floor.

As the beast fell limp on the floor, Wade quickly dodge an attack from another giant rat before he slice off its upper torso, followed by a downward slash that cut the upper torso in half.

The merc then spotted a charging swarm of skeletal ghoul. He then sheath both of his swords then proceed to punch the first ghoul in its face, broken its neck as a result.

Wade then swung his elbow backward, knocking a ghoul's head off of its neck upon impact.

Just then, a ghould managed to bit Wade in the arm, causing him to yelled " **YoW-how-hoooow"** before Wade punches it, rip its head off and starts beating the other ghouls with itbefore they finally overwhelmed the guy and pin him on the ground and starts eating him.

The team can clearly hear Wade's voice yelling " **EY! I need that finger! OWWW! Hey hey hey Hey HEY! DON'T YOU DARE EAT THAT! OWWW-HO-HOW! Why did I even think it was a good idea to fight these things with my hands? Are you happy now you incompetent sicko? YOUR Horrible writing have reduced me into a retard worst than the teenagers in those C rank Horror flicks! Hell I bet YOU'RE the one who wrote the script for that shitty ass Zoombies… I mean, a ZOMBIE SLOTH? What's it gonna do? Oh yea, NOTHING! It's gonna take like what? 2 fucking hours for it to chew through your clothes? You know why don't you write a script for a sloth zombies apocalypse? It'll be over after 2 mins, opening credits, zookeeper be yelling "HOLY SHIT! A horde of Zombie sloths" and the crowd be like "Meh" THE END, Rollll the credit!"** as he being eaten.

The team was awkwardly looking at the scene with Finn saying "Sho..should we help him?"

Tiona then said "Who is he..talking to anyway?"

Her twin sister shrugged "Probably this… "virgin fatass writer" again… I swear the guy do this at least a couple of times a week… kinda creeps me out…"

Riveria didn't say anything as she gave her staff to Tiona then pick up the 30 caliber. The elven then put on the oven mitt and hold the gun the same way Wade held it earlier as she aims at the swarm of ghoul and held down the trigger.

The hailstorm of leads from the machine gun made short work of the monsters, tearing them apart, leaving a horrendously eaten, and mostly naked Wade, still alive and well on the floor saying " **Awww yuck, I think one of their nutsacks is in my mouth"**

Riveria then look at the smoking barrel of the machine gun as she said "I gotta admit mister Wilson, the people from your world sure knows how to make weapons…"

As she said so, the team saw Lili, who was running toward them while shooting her crossbow at a bunch of monsters that was chasing her.

Wade instantly recognized Lili as he said " **Heyyyy, you're that furry yiffOOMF"**

The merc's sentence was cut short when Lili steps on his face and ran right toward Aiz, screaming for help.

Aiz notices the wound on her head and quickly held Lili before helping her down on her knee.

Riveria kneel down beside Lili, placed one hand on her wound then starts chanting a spell. A split second later, Riveria's hand glow and completely healed Lili's wound.

The elven then asked "What happened?"

Lili, still sobbing as she said "Please, you got to save him… There's a Minotaur in the floor just below… Lili..Lili don't know how it got there but.. but HE'S Fighting it! Lili beg of you, Please save him… That thing is gonna kill him!"

Aiz's eye widened as she silently gently let go of Lili and dashes toward the next floor entrance without saying a word.

Riveria, who seems to know what's going on, says "It must be the young man Aiz saved…on that day…"

Bate suddenly scorned "Hmp, Can't believe Wallenstein still stick up for that piece of trash…"

Lefiya frowned "Seriously Bate… what's your problem? Ever since I joined this Familia, I've hear YOU speaking so hateful and hurting others…especially those who are weaker than us…"

Tione nodded "She's right… we never looked down on anyone just because they have low stats… mind you, we've ALL started at THEIR places…"

The werewolf shrugged "So? What's wrong with saying the truth? Trashs will always be tras…"

His sentence was cut shorts when a gun shot echoed through the cave system, the team then saw a bleeding hole on Bate's arm before they looked at the source of the shot. It was from Wade, who was holding a Chiappa Rhino 60DS Revolver with the barrel still smoking.

Bate began to feel the pain as he grabbed his wound and screamed at the merc "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING YOU TRAS…"

His sentence was once again cut short when another shot from the revolver pierce into his kneecap, forcing him on one knee.

Wade, who only have only his boxers and the upper half of his mask on, with the addition of having to skip toward the group since one of his leg was eaten by the ghoul, said with a low, serious voice " **Your truth? Or… the truth?"**

Bate attempt to stand up and lunge at Wade, but only for him to be shot in the shoulder.

The merc then look at Riveria and asked " **You can heal those wounds right?"**

Riveria look at Wade for a moment before she closed her eyes and sighs "It's childplay for me…"

Wade then continues " **You know… beside the fact that you've been on my fucking nerve the moment I met you… that… PC master race attitute… running around calling consoles users peasants… saying "It's not arrogant to speak tne truth"… That's not the truth.. that's their truth, the truth they believed to be… the truth they created and enforced into others who have different preferences to believe themselves to be…lesser beings for having likings of their own… and believe themselves to be gods for owning a 2000 dollars gaming rig…"**

Tiona leans toward Riveria as Wade speaks and asked "Uhhhh… what the heck is he talking about?"

Riveria "Probably some sorts of… social structure in his world…I don't see how it is… remotely related to this…"

Wade then continues " **…See, then when somebody stands up to them and say "Ya know what ya elitist? I'm a peasant and I'm proud!" you best believe that brave peasant is going to be lynched…metaphortically speaking… but when the same "peasant" said something like "Ya know what? I acknowledge that PC are better, but I like Consoles and dammit I will play consoles for the rest of my "peasant" life"… those PC gods-wannabe be all warm and welcoming… yea, welcoming their new lap dog…"**

Wade then shot Bate in his other shoulder before he continues " **Now I know what I've just say make zero sense to you… just like that Ice Bucket challenge in my world but the POINT IS… I gotta make this quick since we're 5 minutes late for the next scene… See the attitute of the PC master race snobs and how they think of the peasants are not THAT far from how you and… possibly your kind thinks when you look at the… low level adventurers… trample on them like trashs because it's… The "Truth"…."**

The merc then raise his revolver and said " **You see this gun? This thing only costed around 1000 dollars in my world… pratically worth a flimsy dagger in this world… so basically, this thing, by the standard of your world, is nothing but a piece of junk metal that can fire projectiles at high speed… yet THIS hunk of trash just dug 4 holes in your body like it was nothing… and it can dig more holes if I feel like it"**

Bate haven't given up yet, as he snarled "YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS YOU TR.."

Wade quickly fire 4 more shots into Bate's body, knocking him down and said " **… How does it feel? Frustrated? Angry? Powerless? Humiliated by a piece of trash? THAT'S EXACTLY HOW EVERY SINGLE PERSONS FEELS about YOU when YOU steps on them, being humiliated by an elitist, superior complex self-inflated chihuahua piece of trash… yea, where I come from, pieces of trash that sits at the very top of the food chain are seemingly infinite… YOU and YOUR KIND are no exception…"**

Wade then look at the team and said " **…Not you guys…"**

Finn shrugged "We know, it's ok"

Wade then look back at Bate and said " **far as I see… the worst type of trash…are those that shit on other "trashs" and acts as if it's a virtual and need acceptance…"**

Wade then shot one more round into Bate's left foot before skipping toward the next floor entrance saying " **I'm gonna rescue some my trashy friend…coming with me or not…it's on you guys…"**

Lefiya seems a bit impressed as she said "Gee…never knew he could be…serious"

Finn smiled before he follows Wade while saying "But… he makes a good point…"

Tiona, Tione and Raul then quickly follows with Tiona saying "I'm feeling like helping a "piece of trash" out, how bout you sis?"

Tione nodded "the feeling is mutual,dear sister"

Raul then said "Yea, I love trashs"

Riveria look at her teammates with a smile while holding Lili's hand before looking back Bate, who was still bleeding on the floor.

The elven then walks toward the werwolf, then uses her staff to create a healing sigil around him by chanting the spell before she slam the staff downward.

As the sigil began to do its magic on Bate's wounds, Riveria said to him "… you know… I was agaisnt the fact that he shot you like that… it's kinda extreme but… honestly, maybe that's the only way you'll learn…"

Riveria then said to Lili "I'll accompany you out of the Dungeon once I'm done here miss… It's dangerous for a supporter to be here alone…"

Lili shook her head as she protest "No,No… Lili must get back to mister Cranel, please… mister Cranel protected Lili with his very life despite her lowly status as a supporter… she… she must do what she can to repay her gratitute…please!"

Riveria look at Lili for a bit before she giggled lightly "That boy…"

The elven then look at Bate and said "You know that boy might be trash… but I would be quite honor to have him in my trash can…over you…"

Bate's only respond was a grunt as he look away from her.

…

It took a whole 30 minutes for Bate's wounds to heal completely, as the trio catches up to their other teammates, Lili and Riveria couldn't believe their eyes as they saw Wallenstein, stood there, looking astounded, same as Finn,Raul and the twins.

What's in front of them was Bell, with his upper armor completely shattered and his shirt ripped to shred, revealing his Familia stats seal.

The young man's left arm was broken, his head was bleeding and some of his ribs seems to be broken. Yet, he still standing, gasping for air. But what's more is that the minotaur is dead.

Riveria asked Wallenstein "Di..did yo.."

Aiz shook her head and said, with a proud voice "No… I didn't… he told me to stay back…so I did… he killed it… all by himself…"

Finn slowly clap his hand as he said "Truly impressive young man, truly impressive"

Bell then turn around, slowly due to the pain, he seems to be disoriented and highly exhausted from the blood loss and the fight yet for some reasons, he stills standing.

Wade then skip toward and slap Bell on his back and said " **DAMN KID! That's far better than that Pac-man and Mayweather's fight on soooo many levels and blah,blah blah blah, blah blauh…"**

At that point, Wade's voice doesn't seems to mean anything to the young man's ears anymore, he just slowly look around,seemingly confused, as if he was looking for something. Then out of nowhere, he screamed "HESTIA!"

Everyone was silent as his scream echoes through the cave.

Bell then screamed again "HESTIAAAAA!"

And again "HESTIA!"

And yet once again "HESTIA!"

…

The view then zoom right out of the Dungeon, then to a bird eye view of Orario before focusing on the store where Hestia's working in, showing the goddess organizing the goods enthusiastically before she suddenly stopped and look toward the direction that lead to the Dungeon for a brief moment as if she felt something.

Then, a faint, but clear enough to make out name slips into her ears. It was her name, and the voice that was calling it was Bell.

Not a word, Hestia drop the box of goods and zoom right out of the store, running in the same manner of a T-1000 at top speed, with her bare feet, leaving a trail of smoke as she does.

The goddess ram through countless food stands on the way, brusies one of her eyes and leave some food stains on her dress, but that didn't slow her down as she proceed toward the Dungeon, passing a crowd of astounded citizens and adventurers alike.

…

It only took her a full minute to run pass the horde of monsters, confused monsters to be precise at her display of speed to reach the floor where Bell was.

Once there, Hestia lunge toward Bell,who was hugged by Lili and tackled him to the ground, while pushing Lili out of the way in the process.

Once that's done, Hestia quickly asked him loudly "Bell! Wha… What happened to you? Oh my god who did this to you?"

Her voice then become dark and demonic "YOU POINT THEM OUT! NOW! I'LL END THEM! WHOOO?"

Bell then pointed at the dead minotaur and said "I…I did it your grace.. I finally did it…"

Hestia look at the dead minotaur before her, then at Finn, Wade and the others with Riveria saying "It's true your grace, all by himself"

Hestia's eyes began to form tears, it didn't take long for her to broke down and hug her mortal boyfriend as tight as she can and sob out loud, in a rather obnoxious cute way with everyone witnessing it.

…

End of Chapter 13


	15. Here comes the wife

_**Chapter 14: Here comes the wife**_

 **(Deadpool: Ok that last chapter… was a fucking corn-fest disaster, Where're the jokes? Where's MINE spotlight? All I see was a bunch of Twilight level cheesy lines… Is this revenge on me for calling you a Fatass Virgin? OH and for you readers out there… if there're anyone bored enough to read this crud… there's gon' be a… what's the term? Orange? Apple? ..uh… Banana Cabana?... OH, Lemon scene, BUT, not in the way you… expect it to be… so any of you squeemish readers ou there… just assuming once again, who still reading this, you have been warned)**

 _ **New York City, City's Outskirt, AIM's test site…**_

"C'mon You maggots! How hard can it be to built a portal using that purple crystal?" asked Shiklah, with an angry voice as she sat on a throne made from dead AIM personnels with her legs crossed.

In front of her was a busy scene, AIM technichians and scientists, inlcuding MODOK himself was connecting a bunch of wires and setting up numerous computers that connected to a complex generator.

One of the workers reluctantly replied "Well your great one, hard is not exactly the right…word.. you see it's.."

Shiklah rolled her eyes and said "Does Rhetorical questions mean anything to you nerds? GET BACK To WORK!"

The man jumped before he said "Ri…Right away Ol' Great One!"

MODOK was using his power to connects the final components into the machine and place a purple crystal into its center before adjusting the machine one more time. The man grunted " This is by far the most humiliating moment of my life… enslaved… by a mere lesser succubus… just so she could fullfil her… childish wish… "Oooooo I want to see my husbanddd so I can kick him square in ze nutzz!" … "

Shiklah seems to heard that as she replied out loud "For YOUR information flying prune face… I am anything BUT a mere succubus… and if you don't pick up the pace, I am going be your DEATH…"

MODOK grunted as he asked one of the scientists "Is the system ready?"

The AIM personnel was checking the monitors before he said "All good sir!"

MODOK then said "Then let's get this over with…" before he float toward the computers and enter the command lines and hits enter.

As he does so, the machine began to vibrate, then, the crystal began to float into the air.

As cracks began to form on the crystal's surface. MODOK and the AIM quickly back away from the machine as far as they can.

Shiklah seems overly calm as she said "Hmph… took you long enough, I got cobwebs on my hair" before she stood up and walks toward the cracking crystal.

Then, once Shiklah was just feets from it, the crystal shatters, creating yet another portal and began to suck everything in its radius inside, save for her.

The queen of the underworld then crack her knuckles and jumps inside.

As usual, the moment a living organism jumps inside, the portal suddenly become unstable and disappear. However, as this one does so, it release a EMP shockwave that sweep throught New York, causing a full scale blackout.

Back at MODOK and his employees, they awkwardly look at the rubbles remains of their machine for a full minute before one of the agent said "Well… guess no My Little Pony for me tonight…"

As he said so, a couple of other personnel looks at him weird, causing the guy to replied "What, It's a good show,sure it can be corny as fuck but at least it doesn't teach you to be an asshole… like Jefferey here… That's right Jeff, you're the biggest asshole sunnova bitch I have ever met, you mess up my desk, you piss in my trash bin, you put plutonium in my drink, you gave me vaseline for my birthday, you spoiled The Force Awakens, and most of all… YOU S…"

As he reaches that part, the screen suddenly black out.

…

 _ **Orario, the next day…**_

The scene then shows Hestia, sitting next to Bell, who was sleeping like a little kid on his stomach with bandages all over his body. The goddess slowly run her hand on the young man's back, across the stats tattoos as she said gently "Oh I can look at him like this forever… he's sooo cute when he snores like that"

Jealousy then slowly drip down from the ceiling as it whispers into her ears " _You knowww, the hairy one and the… short one are still asleep… who knows when will you get another chance like this…"_

Hestia shrugs as she said "Oh that's ok… I can wait… to see my Bell grown so much in such a short time if more than enough happiness for me for the time being… beside… no harm showing him the wonderous… ritual that connects a man and a woman when he's all full and ripe…"

Jealousy awkardly asked " _What?"_

Hestia turns to it and shouted "SEX! I mean SEX, jeez… you just have to make me say it…"

…

 _ **At the same time, inside the Dungeon…**_

"Ughh… smells like my first husband's house…" said Shiklah as she wipe the dust off of her dress while taking a look around.

Once that's done, the underworld's queen said with both hand on her hip "Now… where the heck is this cesspool anyway?"

As she said so, she can feel numerous foot steps that shook the very ground below her feet, and many spine chilling growls that eachoes around the large cave she's standing in.

Then, about a dozen of Minotaurs walks out from the dark, each with their own weapons and only one purpose, destroy what's in their path.

The ginormous beasts didn't waste anytime before they roared and charge toward her all at once.

The Queen of the Underworld rolls her eyes as she raised both of her hands and unlease two purple energy beam and swept them around the room, decapitating the Minotaurs in mere seconds.

As their corpses fell to the ground, a minotaur jumps out from the dark and swung its axe right at her. However, Shiklah raises one of her hand and block the attack then points her palm at the beast's face before she unlease another energy beam that completely vaporize the creature's head down to its shoulders.

At this point, the lesser monsters lurking around the area was scared shitless as they all panickingly runs away as far away from her as they can.

Shiklah blow off the smoke coming from her palm before she check her other hand, the one that she uses to block the attack to find a broken nail.

The queen seems a bit irritated as she said "Ooo for your sake,dear husband… you better be here…" before she began looking for the exit.

…

The scene then show Shiklah, walking among the street of Orario, with all ten of her fingers being decorated with jeweled gold rings and numerous expensive jewelry on her body, under the stares of many citizens, female and male all alike.

The queen doesn't seems to notices as she was marvelling at her new accessories as she said "I don't know what kind of weirdo's fantasy realm is this but… the first impression was… enjoyable so far…"

Then she look around a bit before thinking to herself "Okk… now where could that idiot husband of mine be in a place like this?"

As the queen look around for a moment, she saw Mia's bar's sign.

Then, as she saw numerous beautiful barmaids with well-endowed bodies walks in and out of the establishment, the queen said "That looked potential…" as she casually walks in.

As the door slam open, gathering the attention of everyone inside, Shiklah walks in and said "I demand to know if any of you mortals seen an idiot with a…"

One of the maid, who turns out to be Seal quickly budge in "a red suit?"

Shiklah then said "That's the one… point me to him"

Mia, who have just step out from the back asked "But… who are you to him,lady?"

Shiklah then suddenly turns a human size version of her demonic form and replied "His wife!" before turning back into her human form.

The whole bar was filled with silence for a a couple of second before Mia shrugs and said "Well, if you put it that way…"

…

 _ **A while later, near Hestia's familia headquarter…**_

"Heyy babe, you've ever been in bed with a human before?" asked an adventurer with a dirty look on his face as he saw Shiklah walks toward his direction, with a badly drawn map in her hand.

The underworld queen stopped and take a look at the man in front of her for a moment before she smirked "Why yes I did… and from the looks of you… he's still farrrrr better than you'll ever be…"

As she said so, Shiklah grab his face with her palm and slam the back of his head into the ground before she move on.

Once in front of the Hestia's headquarter, which seems to have undergo a few changes, positive changes to be precise. Thanks to the money Bell and Wade raked in, Hestia was able to expand the front yard, plant a cute little garden and a small pond.

Shiklah said as she walks pass the small yard "Cute place"

Once at the door, the underworld queen casually knocks on it and examine her nails as she waits.

It wasn't long before the door opens, revealing Hestia behind it.

Of course the goddess doesn't recognize Shiklah as she look at the tall, light-purple skinned, well endowed woman in front of her as she asked "Uhhh… Can I eh… help you with something?"

Shiklah then asked "Where's my husband?"

Hestia just awkwardly stares at her before she slowly lift her index finger and move it toward Logan, who was sleeping next to Lili.

Shiklah seems to understand what the goddess means as she shook her head "Nope"

Hestia, still retain her blank, awkward expression slowly move her index finger until it points at Lili.

Shiklah then look at the goddess with one of her eye brow raised as she said "Really?"

Hestia, still with her blank expression replied "Just… making sure…" before she move her finger toward Bell, who was still snoring in his bed, which can be seen from the front door.

Shiklah then smiles "Cute guy… Buut… No"

Hestia blankly replied "Oh good, so I won't have to kill you…"

Before Shiklah can say anything in return, Hestia asked "I think I know where your husband is… miss eh…"

Shiklah flick her hair as she replied "Shiklah, Shiklah Wilson, Queen of the Underworld…"

Hestia seems a bit confused as she said "Oh…I see, anyway uh, I can draw you a map…"

…

 _ **The Twilight house…**_

"Wade! I need to talk to you about something…" said Loki as she stares right at Wade's masked face.

The merc only stares back at her as a reply.

Loki then continues "… In my room"

Right then a big grin appears under his mask as he said " **Damn gurl' , getting hot n bother THIS early in the afternoon?"**

Loki replied with a punch right in his face, thanks to her peak human strenght due to the fact that she's a goddess, the punch sent Wade flying and slam right into the wall right at the end of the hall.

While still stuck on a wall, Wade replied " **Ok, Ok, we'll cuddle first"**

…

Loki was sitting on her bed as she said "Wade… I want to know if you have anything to do with uh… our… recently, shortage of loot…"

Wade raised his finger while he was examine an big broadsword display on her wall, however before he can answer, Loki cuts him off "Don't bother, It was a rhetorical question… I already know you've been using it to help funding Hestia's Familia behind our back…well.. actually we all knew… I.. Just wanna see what kind of story you'll come up with this time… I really enjoyed the one about the Orphange for babies elves being burn to the ground and you want to help them rebuild it…"

Wade then said " **Actually, it's half-true… I burned it down by accident so I wanted to make it up to them…well, thankfully no babies was harm…couldn't really say the same for the caretakers there… two're still in a coma… and the rest are still in the Intensive care… Least I killed the real culprit…"**

Loki then said "… well that would explain those babies elves on our doorstep last week… Tiona and Tione really sad to see them having to go back to the orphange… I.. I kinda miss them too… they're loud, snots and poops constantly… but… they made the place a bit cozier…on…one of them even called me dad…"

Wade then pops his eye brows as he said " **Well… you…could adopt one of them"**

Loki chuckles as she replied "And here I though you were gonna suggest that we…"

Wade then cuts her off " **OR we could make 'em ourselves"**

Right as he said so, Loki punches him in the face again as she shouted "YOU PERVERT!", sending the guy right out of her room and into a wall.

However, her cheeks was as red as Wade's suit. The goddess look at the man on the wall in front of her for a bit before she said, reluctantly "Bu…But… it doesn't… sounds like a bad idea… either…"

Wade, still stuck on the wall awkwardly ask " **Sooooooooo… is that a yes?"  
**

Loki look away with her cheeks still red as she said "Jus…Just get in here and lock the door behind ya…"

…

"Hey… the hell are you three doing?" asked Raul as he saw Tione, Tiona and Lefiya pressing their ears against's Loki's chamber's door.

Lefiya just gesture her finger at the door without saying anything. It doesn't take long for Raul to give in to his curiosity and went over to join the three on the eavesdropping aswell.

The moment Raul's ears was against the door's surface, he can hear Loki's voice saying "Uhhhh… you should keep the mask on…"

Then, a brief pause before Wade's voice can be heard " **Heyy nice thighs, you do crossfit?"**

Then, another brief pause follows before Loki's voice can be heard exclaiming "Holy shit…"

Wade's voice then can be heard " **My wife said that too, evertime like it's our first time…well, to me it's my first with her anyway…"**

Then, Loki's voice can be heard "Uhh…lemme just… wai…wait, could you move… Oh ok… erhh.. perpo irn yor wor actu ler dor dit at parg og harvin' serx?"

 **(Deadpool: Okk, before you asked me about why did just typed like a retard back there… just try reading that part with your mouth open like you're sucking on an ice cream and you'll know why… You gotta understand that our widdle loser of a writer is a big pussy, he's afraid that the word "BJ" will offend people, Oh you know how easily piss off people can be nowadays, One time I went to a Star Bucks joint… I just walks in, shouting "One Cappuchino and LOTS of Glutton, please?" and BAM everyone was offended so they kicked me out)**

Wade's voice then follows " **Pretty much yea… woah woah woah, slow down~~~ you'll yank it right off… seriously though, you're as strong as Logan… he yanked my arm off once and beat me with it"**

Loki's voice then can be heard "Oh c'mon, it'll grow back…wouldn't it?"

Then, another long pause follows, giving Lefiya some times to say "Uhhh… I know it's good to see her grace finally find someone special.. but eh… are you sure they're… having sex in there? Sounds more like an episode from that episodic theater play "Wedded with babies elves"…"

Then, Loki's voice can be heard "Don't rush ok? I need to find a comfortable position… maybe this.. Nah, or..oompf… nope, maybe… ughhh too indecent… maybe this… Heyy this is perfect… Ok, I'm ready"

Wade's voice then can be heard " **Seriously? And I though S***** Gr**** was the kinky nasty one…wait… ok, who's the wise guy that bleep me off just now?"**

Back outside the door, Raul asked "Uhh… what's this… bleeping he's talkin' about?"

Lefiya shrugs "Dunno, I didn't hear any bleeps… who's this… S****** Gr*** anyway?"

Then, Loki's voice can be heard "Hey hey hey HEY! Slow down yer yucko, It's my first time… Ughh… ohhhh…Oh… Ohhhhh me that hurts like hell… EY I didn't say stop!"

Lefiya's face began to show a weird expression as she asked with her ears still pressing against the door "What…in her grace's name are they doing in there? Wrestling?"

Raul replied "Well whatever it is… it doesn't really sound like sex…"

Then Loki's voice can be heard "Hey pick up the pace back there, It's like having sex with Kronos… Oh..Ohhh yes YES! YES! Faster, faster! FASTER! YIISSSSSS!"

Tione and Tiona can only put one hand on their faces as they both shook their heads and blushes.

Then Wade's voice can be heard " **YABAA DABBA DOOOOOO"**

All four of the eavesdroppers drops their jaws as they heard that.

Then Loki's voice can be heard "AW Dammit I said INSIDE! That's my favorite bedsheet ya numb nuts!"

Lefiya then awkwardly "Well eh… at least, somebody finds her… attractive, psyhologically and sexually…"

The moment she said so, the whole Twilight House was shook by a loud bang down at the main lobby hall.

The scene quickly shows Shiklah, standing just outside the doorway, with one of her feet just been lowered after she kicked the big, expensive wooden doors right off their hinges and sent them right into a wall.

As Shiklah took a couple of steps inside and take a look around, Aiz, Finn and Riveria's head can be seen poking out from one of the collumn, looking curisously at the intruder.

Then, the Queen of the Underworld shouted "WADE WINSTON WILSONNN!"

After her earth shattering scream eachoes through the entire castle for a whole 2 seconds, Riveria, Finn and Aiz turns their head when they heard Wade's voice saying " **MA?** ", Then, the merc, only wearing his boxers and mask awkardly walk out on the second floor balcony, along with Loki, who only wear a towel on her body.

Wade instantly recognize his wife as he said " **Eyyyheyhey! Honeycake! What's sha…"**

Before he can speak further more, Shiklah leaps right up to the second floor, push him right into a wall with one of her hand gripping his manhood, causing the guy to yelped in high-pitch and said "EXPLAIN!"

Wade then said, still in high pitch " **See, remember that Allow-to-date-n-wed people list, honey? I'd like you to meet Loki, your future sister"**

Shiklah then turns her head to look at the goddess who awkwardly wave at her and said to her husband "Wade, there's a difference between a woman and a BOY who LOOKS like a woman"

Loki obviously offended by her comment, so the goddess snaps back "HEY! You want a woman? HOW'S THIS FOR A WOMAN?" before she grab both the edges of her towel and open them up, revealing her flat, but luscious body to Shiklah, but more importantly, her "bussiness region".

Shiklah seems impressed a she look at the goddess in front of her for a bit before she said "Well then… on to the next matter" before turning back to her husband, with her hand still on his manhood.

Wade then awkwardly said in high-pitch " **Listen honey, If it's that beautiful… flat-chested Mermaid coming to ask about me I can explain…"**

Shiklah rolls her eyes before she said "Oh Not THAT you idiot, that mermaid was a guy!"

Wade's eyes shot wide open as he heard that.

His wife then continues "… Now just shut up and lead me to your room"

Shiklah then turns to Loki and said "You're coming too, future sister-in law" before she grab her hand and drag both along with her, Shiklah then said "Oh, hello dear step-daughter" as she walk pass a confused Ellie who was just walking by.

The little girl asked **"** Uhh dad?"

Just as she said so, Lefiya pick her up and said "Uhhh your dad have important issues to eh… disscuss with your step-mom and lady Loki hun, C'mon, we'll take you out for some ice cream ok?"

Ellie innocently nodded excitingly.

…

Half an hour later, the scene shows Loki, Shiklah and Wade in Loki's bed, with Shiklah buck naked as she wraps her arms around both Loki and Wade with a sastisfied grin on her lips while saying "Ahhhh yes, it sure feel estactic to relief all those tension've been building up after 4 months…"

Loki awkardly said "That was the best…yet the most awkward experience I have ever been throught"

Shiklah smirks "Oh you'll get used to it eventually… say, what do you… do for fun around this dump?" as she looks at Wade, who was snoring loudly.

End of Chapter 14


	16. A Non-Deadpool Episode

_**Chapter 15: A Non-Deadpool Episode**_

 _ **(Deadpool: AHHH yes, It's good to be BACK in the spotlight once more, after that seemingly long hiatus from Fatty McButterface here,BUT today I wanted to do something different, See I though to myself, I've got more than enough spot light, why not giving it to someone else just for one episode? Well, geeks and… geekettes? This episode is going to be about Bell and that "yandere" goddess girfriend of his, hey after that victory against the Minotaur, that's the least I can do for the lad, Now if you'll excuse me, Imma need some Quality time with my wife ANNNDD my soon-to-be-wife)**_

 _ **Orario's Tower of the Gods, top floor…**_

"Alright, Gods and Goddesses, here we are at the…eh… 1 hundred and… oh what the heck, I'm tired of keeping track of all the times I have to see your mugs here anyway… so let's get on with it" said Loki as she put both hands on a large,round table, with each chair being seated by a god and goddesses from various religions.

One of the gods spoke "Haven't seen you in a good mood for a while Loki, what's up?"

Loki smirks "Well, since you insisted, I just happen to get my hand on one of the BEST Adventurers out there…BUT, that's something we'll discuss later on…Now, first matter of business…"

As Loki began speaking, Hestia, with a bored look on her face can be see sitting next to Hephaestus, who was reading another Punisher comic issue intently.

The barefooted Goddess huffed as she said "Man…how I hated having to come here now and then… seeing all these… smug, arrogant, perverted faces looking at me…and my boobs…"

Hephaestus didn't even look away from the comic as she replied "To be fair Hestia, I'm sure most of them think the same way about each others…"

Right then, Jealousy suddenly craw its way out from Hestia's back and open its nightmarish jaw before it spoke " _We LOVE it here… we can smell jealousy,fear,resentment and hatred everywhere, all around this disgusting room… is this some sort of "buffet"?"_

It's entrance startled all the gods and goddesses alike, save for Loki who spoke with a irritated tone "Geez, Don't they have a sign that say "No pet allowed" at the front entrance?"

Hestia shrugs before she said "For your information, Miss Ol' Flatty McBoobies, THIS happen to be part of my outfit"

Jealousy then wraps itself around her body and morphed into a skin-tight bodysuit, covered her face and replace it with the Symbiotes signature elastic, sharps fang filled jaw while morphing her twin tails into a pair of wiggling tentacles.

Then, to the gods's horror,except for Loki, the suit's "mouth" open widely, reveal Hestia's face behind it.

She seems to be taking pleasure seeing fears on her colleagues's faces as she smiles and said "See anything you like?"

The only reply she got was silence.

Loki then cleared her throat and said "ANYWAY, on to business.."

As she said so, Hephaestus lean next to Hestia and whispered "What kind of people did you hang out with lately anyway?"

Hestia just smiles in return.

The screen then turn back to Loki who continues "… And by that I mean… the naming ceremony"

The moment she said that, devious grins and nervous gulps can be seen and heard all around the meeting attendants.

Loki then picks up a piece of paper and said "Now then, first up, is from the House of Set, Seti's adventurers"

The god Set jumped as he heard his Familia's name being called while the other gods turns to him with devious looks on their faces.

Loki then reads the paper for a moment before she said "It is decided that the adventurer Seti Selti…rhymic name by the way… will hence forth be known with the title "Burning Fighting Fighter"

Upon hearing that title, Set can only slam his face on the table in shame as the gods started making jokes or just laughed it out, with one god can be hear saying "Look on the bright side Set, the boy could still be famous amongs the toddlers of Orario with a title like that"

Hestia seems a bit shocked, yet disgusted as she said "Look at them… always preying on each other, humiliate, steals and stomp on one another with every chance they get… how are they,or any of us better than mortals?"

Hephaestus didn't reply as she continue reading the comic.

Loki then pick up another paper and spoke the moment she saw it "Heyy, that's a cute girl you got Takemikazuchi…"

The screen then shows the paper Loki was holding,which was a drawing of a young Japanese-looking girl with a stern expression and her black hair tied up into a long ponytail.

Loki then continues "Hmm… high-level equipments…if you know what I means…and her name is Yamato Mikoto, cute name too…"

The flat-chested goddess then look at Takemikazuchi, who was sweating nervously and said "Gee… to subject such a pure, beautiful maiden to such a cruel,cruel ceremony… I've misjudged you Takemikazuchi… you're in love with a mortal?what, aren't those divine goddesses good enough for ya?"

Takemikazuchi shot up from his seat and said loudly "Hey, I raised her personally from the moment I found her up until this VERY. DAY! The LEAST you jerks can do is be GENTLE for once in your immortal life"

Loki then said "Wellll…. But then again… who am I to judge?"

The moment she said so, the entire room turns their gaze upon her, with one god bold enough to ask "Wait… YOU?"

Loki glares at him and said "It's none of your business, SO, have we decided?"

One of the god stood up and said "I vote the title of "Angel"

Another one stood up and said "I say "Last Heroine"

Yet another one said "Fortune Galaxy"

Loki then said loudly, silencing the loud attendants "Alright settle down, He's right, we should be gentle once in a while, SO, how's "Absolute Shadow?" sounds? Yay or nay?"

Everyone in the room, except for Hephaestus and Hestia all replied loudly "Yay!"

Takemikazuchi's scream can be heard in the background as he went "DAMN IT!" as Loki said "Trust me, Take… that's the most gentle we can go on you"

Loki then pick up another paper and said "Next, is my beloved Aiz… but since none of you knuckleheads deserve to or even capapble of coming up with a title better than "Sword Princess", let's leave it as it is"

Not a single word was heard from the other deities as a reply.

Loki then pick up another paper, and on it was a drawing of Wade, which looked like a highschool yearbook photo, in the picture, Wade have on a ivory and tacky red patterns turtleneck sweater and his mask on.

Loki look at the picture for a bit before she whispered "He's so cute when he does that"

The flat chested goddess quickly clears her throat before she continues "Anyway, I have a personal request…for my newest member of the Loki's Familia, Wade Winston Wilson, aka Deadpool as he called himself, he's not from Orario but his progress within my Familia is nonetheless more than worth mentioning, I…"

One of the deities raises his hand and said "Wade Winston Wilson? You mean that…"

Loki nodded "Yes, that babbling moron in the red suit who looked like a domesticated undead and healing powers that even I'm envious of,whose mouth is as "deadly" as his swordsmanship…or gunsmanship… that's what he called those projectile weapons of his…guns…"

One of the gods asked "Say eh, where can my childrens get one of these "Guns"?"

Loki shrugs "Wade's the only who have access to them, but that's not the point here…we're talking about his title here, any suggestions?"

Every single deities in the room,including Hephaestus and Hestia spoke up "The Red Blabbermouth"

Without a second of hesistation, Loki said "Motion carried"

She then pick up a drawing of Bell and look at it with a tense set of eyes before she said "Now, the last one for today…a Lv 2, newly appointed I might add, Adventurer from Hestia's Familia, Bell Cranel…"

Once she said, Loki slam the paper onto the table and said "But, first thing first…" as she look straight at Hestia, who still have both her legs, with both of her feet been modified by Jealousy's suit and turned them into a pair of high heels with a pointy sharp front lounged on the table,which was not something she normally, or ever done before.

Loki then said "Tell me Hestia… have you… been using your divine power to…how do I put it? Remodelled him?"

That question got the room began to stirred up, Hestia can feel a sweat running down her cheek as she replied with a much deeper voice due to her wearing Jealousy "Now why the heck would I wanna do that?"

Loki frowned "I suppose so…but at least explain to me how in the name of Ares…"

Ares,who was sitting at the table said "Word"

Loki blankly look at him for a moment before she continue "..how in MY name can this boy get to level 2 in just ONE month? It took a whole year for my Aiz to reach level 2, that kind of speed is impossible for a mere mortal…"

Hestia bit her lips as the Symbiote closes its jaw, covering her face as she though to herself "I can't afford to spill the fact that he have that rare Realize skill… the moment I do so, my Bell is going to become these hyenas's toy, they'll all went down upon him…unless I can make sure they're not alive to…"

Her train of thoughts was interrupted when Loki's voice shot into her ears "Hestia! Please, I insist that you give us an explaination"

Hestia had Jealously open up its jaw once more as she nervously look around, at all the deities with their eyes set on her, and her breasts.

Right then, a familia, soft, lustful voice emmited from one of the deities "Loki darling, may I have a question?"

Everyone turned to see Freya, smiling at Loki.

Loki glare at Freya and said "Since when did you're interested in things like this… you slut?"

Freya calmly replied "I just think that there's nothing wrong with that, I mean, what bothers me is Your attitute toward Hestia's familia about this metter, I believe you of all deities should've known better than to interfere with other Familia's affair, considering your current social status, both with the mortals realms and the realms of the gods…"

Loki's frown became more visible as Freya continues with her speech "… It make me think, is this some sort of… personal dispute? Grudge? Or…perharps you're… Jealous?"

Loki's gritted her teeth as she heard Freya said so.

Freya can sense anger in Loki's attitute as she smiles "But back on the topic, didn't the boy rightfully defeated the Minotaur, which I might add that was far more powerful than his current level? Now if he uses cheap, pagan tricks, the Excellia system wouldn't have rewarded him with EXP would it? Personally I think it's fate that this boy was to encountered this Minotaur and if fate was to decided that HE should defeat it, who are we to questions it?"

As she said so, the gods began chattering, mostly agreeing with Freya's statement.

Freya seems to have finished what she came for as she stood up and said "Now, if you all will excuse me, I have some personal matter to attend to, oh and I do believe that boy deserve a title just as much as any skilled adventurers out there"

One of the gods seems disappointed as he said "Aw c'mon, you rarely shows up for these meetings, could you at least participate in the naming ceremony before you go?"

Freya shrugs as she smiles "Oh well, I guess I can stick around for a bit…won't you…give him a cute little title? Defeating a Minotaur at his level is no mean feat"

As the gods blushes,obviously from Freya's beauty and power, they all replied "ye…Yes, we'll do our best!"

Then, as the other deities gathered around to debate on a title for Bell, Hestia was sitting with her arms folded and her legs criss-crossed on the table while she leaned against her chair, with her face being covered by Jealousy's "mask".

Suddenly one of her tentacles moves on its own and point its sharp,spiky end at Loki, who was approaching Hestia from behind.

Hestia didn't even look at Loki as she asked "What is it?"

Loki said "Well, for one thing could you tell that…pet of yours to cool off?"

Hestia didn't say anything in return, however her twin tails tentacles moved away from Loki and lowered itself.

The flat chested goddess then said "Listen…Midget, I need to talk to you about something"

Hestia didn't even move a muscle on her body but only turning her head slightly toward Loki, who seems a bit grossed out as she said "Dammit could you open that… "mask" when you talk to people? I like to look those who I talked to in the eyes…"

Hestia then had Jealousy open it jaws again, showing her face, which was connected to a series of small vein-like dark purple substance which connect to her suit yet again, Loki was a bit dumbstruck as she felt something very different from Hestia's eyes, they've gotten darker, along with her attitutes and manners as of late.

Hestia slowly raised one of her eye brow at Loki, who was still staring at her.

Loki seems to forgot what she was about to say to Hestia for a brief moment as she thought to herself "Hestia's… different somehow…that midget have never sit like that before…and those eyes… What's gotten into her? She always starts yelling the moment I stood right in front of her yet now…"

Hestia's voice suddenly knock Loki out of her trance "Earth to Loki Cuttingboard? You were sayinnggg?"

Loki quickly pick herself up and said "It doesn't bring me pleasure telling you this but… you best keep your guard up…"

Hestia then smirks, revealing a set of short but sharp teeth under her lips as she said "From you? Like I need a heads-up for such a thing"

Loki once again shocked when she saw those set of sharp teeth but quickly shrugs it off and said "NO you idiot, I mean from Freya"

Hestia shrugs "What, she's gonna try and bed me? Puh-leaze, she'll fuck anything that moves for all I know"

Loki then snarled quietly "It's about YOUR . BOY!"

That one sentence got Hestia's full attention as she put both her legs down from the table, stood up and look Loki in the eye before she said, once again with a deeper, more sinister voice "Talk"

Loki then said "That slut, she's defending your boy…when was the last time you see her doing something like that..unless she wants something?"

Hestia's eyes become tense as she said "So, You're telling me that…"

Loki nodded as she lean closer "Yes, she got her eyes on your boy Hestia…"

The moment she said so, the two goddesses was startled when the other gods declared in unison, loudly "IT's DECIDED!"

…

As the others deities was leaving, Hestia was looking down at the city way down below from the Olympus-esque meeting room, next to Loki who still staring at Hestia's eyes.

Loki then said "It's… a passable title in my opinion"

Hestia didn't answers.

Loki then asked "Are you…ok? Really…"

Hestia huffed as she turn around and said "I'm perfectly fine…" as she walks to the exit, leaving Loki who looked on with a slight concerned expression on her face.

…

 _ **Hestia's Familia HQ…**_

Bell was lying on Hestia's bed, on his stomach with his shirt off while Hestia, with Jealousy suit removed sitting on top of him as she examine his stats.

Bell decided to break the silence as he said "You know I think "Little Rookie" is a nice title…could have been nicer but you know…"

Bell's sentences was cut short when he felt Hestia's palm running up and down his back, this is not how she normally reads his stats, which caused the young man to jumps and blushes as he said "Uhh… yo…your grace?"

Hestia didn't answer as she suddenly lower her body, paticularly her chests,fully clothed down on his back.

Bell jumps once again as he can clearly feel both side of Hestia's breast touching the skin on his back, followed by her arms slowly wraps around his body.

The young was sweating and blushing intensely as he stuttered "Uhh… Wha..what are you doing your grace?"

Hestia softly replied "You know Bell…since…we're a couple and everything I just.. think that, it's time…"

Bell quickly turn around and slightly move away from Hestia as he asked nervously "Uhhh… time…for eh…what?"

Hestia pops her brows as she said "You know…"

Bell can only stared back awkwardly.

Hestia rolls her eyes and grabb the bottom of her dress before she pull it upward and completely remove it from her body.

The scene now stay behind her buck naked back, with her massive torpedos pointed right at a dumbstrucked Bell with his face completedly tinted red.

Hestia then said "For this…"

Bell's eyes stay wide open as he glued his eyes at her body, but mostly her breasts for a moment before he said "Sweet Aphrodite…"

As he said so, Hestia suddenly put one finger on his lips and said "The only name I wanted to hear within this room for the next 2 hours is gonna be my name, you got that?"

Bell gulped as he nodded sheepishly.

Hestia then slowly push him down on the bed and sat on top of him before she slowly reaches for his pants while saying "And don't worry…I'll make sure you'll call out my name…"

However, just before she could unzip his pants, Lili suddenly burst out from behind Hestia's wardrobe screaming " LILI WON'T LET YOU TAKE BELL's FIRST TIME! YOU HAG!" before she landed a drop kick on Hestia's face, launches her away from Bell and her own bed.

Then, the screen zooms out as rumbling and cat hissing can be heard from Hestia's HQ throughout the night.

…

 _ **End of Chapter 15**_


	17. Is it wrong to pick up a blacksmith

_**Chapter 16: Is it wrong to pick up a Blacksmith in a Shopping District?**_

 _ **Orario's shopping district…**_

Bell and Wade was walking toward a local Armor and Weapon shop not far from the young man's HQ, Bell was still wearing the X-force uniform Wade gave him while Wade switches to the Weapon X outfit with the short sleeves top for some reason.

Bell was counting the money he had inside a coin bag as he asked Wade "So eh…mister Wilson, how's Ellie?"

Wade shrugs " **She's doing great, the girls over at Loki's crib really likes her, which is a good thing since it won't be long until her puberty hits, and she needs someone who can help her through those times…'Cause the last time I tries to explain how puberty works to the girls from Ellie's class for the Father's day show and tell, they placed a restraining order on my ass, Ellie just laughed through my whole lecture thought…"**

Bell stares at him for a bit before he awkwardly said "Okkkk? That's… good to hear…ehh..so, how are you doing?"

Wade grinned under his mask as he said " **Jusssstt dandy kid, say, did you met my wife?"**

Bell rubs the back of his head before he said "Oh, lady Shiklah? Yes..I eh.. I did met her…"

 _Flashback_

Bell was seen walking with Hestia along the shopping district a couple of days ago, hands in hands with Bell said "Does it still hurt your grace?"

Hestia, now with two boot marks imprinted on her face from Lili's rocket drop kick shrugs "Meh"

Bell then said "Oh, did you see Lili today? I was look forward for us three to went out together, where did she disappeared to?"

Hestia then smiles "Oh…I… sent her on a teeny eeny errand…"

 _Flashback within a Flashback~~~_

The scene then show Hestia,with Jealously on her back putting a key into her cleavage before she dust her palms off while looking at her wardrobe, with chains and locks all over, sealing it shut. Lili's voice can be hear from inside shouting "LILI WILL MAKE YOU SUFFER FOR THIS! SHE'S SWEARRR! SHE'LL MAKES YOU SUFFERR!" before a couple of banging sounds can be heard when Lili attempt to break the warbrobe open.

 _Back to the first Flashback~~~_

Hestia smiles gotten darker as she said softly "It might… took her a while to get it done thought…"

As she said so, an purple energy beam burst through a wall of a nearby restaurant, startled everyone.

Then Shiklah steps out from behind the large hole in the wall, holding a man by the throat as she does so.

The queen of the underworld then look at the man, who was wetting his pants in front of the bystanders dead in the eyes and said "You know, there's a lot of things in this sad,sad universe that I detest… such as decaf coffee,the Star Wars prequels, the Twilight saga, that skank on those "magazines" whose butt are thrice the size of her brain, Glee… ANDDD, men who constantly thinks its OK to grab my chest just because they got a six-pack and a slickback hairdo…"

Hestia then leaned toward Bell and whispered "That's Wade's wife"

Bell just gulped nervously in returns.

Back to Shiklah, who seems to have spotted Hestia and Bell. She flash a smile at them then threw her molester with all her strenght, sending him flying right throught 5 buildings before he ended up as a human sticker on the city's Wall.

Bell's eyes wide open as he couldn't help but stare at the purple skinned lady that was walking toward them.

Once only a feet away from the couple, Shiklah reaches out her hand,still glowing with a purple aura and said "Hestia, fancy meeting you again"

The Underworld queen then pointed at Bell and said "And You, must be the husband"

This made both Bell and Hestia blushes as they replied in perfect synchronization "Oh no no no no…it's…it's nothing like that…yet…"

Back to the present, Bell blankly look at Wade and said "She's a very…nice lady"

Wade seems to understand that Bell was lying as he slaps the young man's shoulder and said " **Did the poor bastard who touches her survive?"** as he cackles.

Bell was a bit surprised that Wade knew but decides to answer anyway "Uhh…yes, but I… I don't think he'll be able to move any part of his body ever again…"

With that, Bell turns the knob on the Armor shop's entrance before the duo walks in.

The first thing they saw was a young man, with short red hair, with a scarf wrap around his neck. He was wearing a black traditional Japanese samurai-esque outfit.

The redhead was holding a box containing a set of armor and he seems to be bargaining with the shop owner as he can be hear saying "Oh C'mon,gimme a chance here… you didn't even know if these things I made are ever gonna sell or not…Look, I know my own social status aight? But I'm telling that these are…"

He was interrupted by Bell,who walk straight in and asked the owner "hey uh…do you still have any Welf Crozzo's brand body armor?"

The moment he asked that, both the owner and the redhead just silently stared at the young customer, and Wade, who was playing it a battleaxe in the background for a whole minute.

Then, the redhead suddenly points both of his index fingers at the owner and shouted excitingly "AWWWW YISSSSSS! IN YO FACE, TOLD CHA' People do like the stuffs I made"

While Bell still don't quite understand what's going on, the redhead then began do some silly dance and even poke his butt in front of the owner's irritated face and slaps it a couple of times as he teases "Ugh Ugh Ugh, I got a customer, who DID? I DID! That's who? And who didn't? YOUUUUUUUU! WOhahahahaha" as the redhead doing his victory dance, a loud cartoonish bang followed by a thud can be heard in the background, along with Wade's voice saying " **Uh-oh"**

Once he was done, the redhead opens the box he was holding earlier, revealing a set of armor which bare lots of resemblance to Bell's old armor,saves for some patterns and wider pauldrons before he said "There ya go mate, still freshly hot from the forge, my latest creation"

As Wade was seen trying to resusitate an unconcious man on the floor by baging his chest with a small morningstar mace in the background, Bell look at the armor set in the box, then at the redhead, then back at the box, then at the redhead for a full minute before he said "Wait…you're…you're… Crozz…"

As the redhead, who seems to be Welf Crozzo himself stops Bell in mid sentence before he said "Woah, Yes, It's me, but eh…I'd would really appreciated it if you'd don't call me by my Family name"

Bell was a bit curious but he quickly nodded "Oh,ok, mister Welf"

As he said so, Wade can be seen in the background, along with the store owner, trying to get the unconcious man to woke up, with Wade continue smashing the morningstar mace on the man's chest while the store owner do a couple of CPR on the poor man.

Crozzo then said "Ah-pahpahpah… just Welf… Anyway, Thanks a bunch mate, and since it's my lucky day, I'll give this one out for free"

Bell panickingly protest "Oh no no no, I couldn't just…"

Crozzo chuckles as he said "I know you'll say that…that's why in exchange, I want to talk to ya about something…you have a minute?"

Bell quickly nodded with a smile.

Meanwhile, in the background, Wade and the shop owner can be seen wrapping the seemingly dead man on the floor with a carpet and carry his body to the back of the shop in a sneaky manner.

While all those things happens behind Bell's back, Crozzo seems a bit surprised as he lean closer to Bell's face and said "Say…Ain't you that "Little Rookie" kid?"

…

 _ **A while later, at the fountain of the Shopping District,near Central Park…**_

"I tell ya, I can actually feel Loki's anger aura from here when I heard people chatting about you at The Tower… A newbie actually surpass her Sword Princess's record in leveling, never though I live to see this day" said Crozzo as he sat next to Bell on at the fountain, each with a sandwich in their hands.

Bell blushes from being flattered as he said "Oh thank…thank you, so eh, what did you wanted to talk to me about?"

Crozzo then said "Oh yea, so eh… I forgot to mention, that I'm from the Hephaestus's Familia, and as you all known, we speciallized in Blacksmithing of all type, armor,weapons and magic weapons… But eh, I'm just a underling at the moment…"

As Crozzo said so, Wade can be seen in the background chasing what seems to be a thief wearing a black cloak with the hood being pulled up. Wade was shooting at the runaway with both of his Deagles but the thief managed to dodge all of the bullets.

Back to Crozzo, who doesn't seems to notice the comotion behind him continues "…To be honest, you're my very first customer mate… Of course the other Blacksmiths within the Familia could have lend me a hand you know? Like introducing me to some new adventurers, helping me getting a start… but eh, they're not very social…actually I don't think they like me…"

As he said so,In the background, the chase between Wade and the thief have made its way into a café. The thief was seen jumping through the window on the street level, causing some of the female customers and waitress screams. Wade on the other hand just casually knocks on the door, which was right next to the shattered window the thief made and tap his foot as he wait.

Once one of the scared waitress open the door, the merc casually walks inside,drawing both his Katanas. As he does so, everyone didn't waste a moment as they ran out of the building in panic.

Back to Crozzo, who continues "…Well,I'll…I'll cut to the chase here,I have my own workshop, thanks to my family's long Blacksmithing involved history, passing through generations… I.. Can't be with a Familia who doesn't give a shit about me anymore, no offense to Hephaestus, I'm grateful that she took me in but it's the other members that I don't wanna be with…"

As he said so, numerous loud thuds, banging and gunshots can be heard inside the café, then, a warbrobe can be seen flying out of the window upstair and smashes into the street below,right on top of a random bystander. The man under the wadrobe can be heard saying, in a weak voice "I'm Okkk!... It's a good thing if your lungs starts spraying out some sort of fluid right…right?"

As the poor man said so, Wade's voice can be heard inside " **Hey hey hey hey HEY! I needed that!"** before a couple of gunshots were heard, followed by a couple of thuds, the comes a rather feminine voice screamed into the heaven.

Then Wade's voice can be heard " **Oh mah god, I am sooo sorry…I didn't know you're a girl…nice v…"**

Before he can finish his sentence, a loud thud can be heard before his voice was heard again, but with a rather high-pitched tone, like someone being punched in the crotch " **…v-neck sweater you got by the way…"**

Then, as the fight between Wade and the female thief rage on inside the café's secone floor, the view slowly turn to Crozzo,who continues "…Bell, I want to be a part of Hestia's Familia, I'll resign from the Hephaestus Familia beforehand of course"

Crozzo then said "Now before you consider my request, here's my reasons… no matter how skillful a Blacksmith is, as long as he has no reputations or customers…nobody would bother checking out his creations…let alone buying them… So eh, I need someone to… sorry for saying this but…someone to… advertise my creations to this city…"

As he said so,A female's scream, seemingly from the thief, followed by Wade's voice can be heard in the background,from within the café as the fight proceeds " **Yea, most women does that whenever I took off my…"**

Before his sentence was completed, another loud thud and a male grunt can be heard, followed by Wade's voice once more "… **mask…"**

Then, another series of fighting sounds effects can be heard inside the establishment before Wade's voice can be heard saying " **Wait wait wait that's a Grenad…"**

Before Wade can finish, an explosion shook the café's second floor, startling everyone outside, except for Crozzo and Bell. Following the explosion, Wade can be seen jumping out of the window, holding the thief in his arms, using his body as a shield from the blast.

Once the two landed on the ground, for the first time, Wade's body didn't suffer much injuries except for a couple of bruises and cuts, however his outfit was mostly destroyed, save for his mask, his boots and his boxers.

Back to Crozzo, who continues "BUT that's not all, I have you know I'm no stranger to combat and Dungeon grinding, you'll get a personal Blacksmith and a teammate, and I get my own regular customer, so… what's your answers?"

As he said so, Wade can be seen in the background, lying on his back, with the female thief lying on top of him, with her hood down, she was sporting a half shaved red hairstyle and a piercing on her nose, along with some tattoo on her cheeks.

As the thief slowly come to, she said to Wade "Yo…you… You saved me…"

Wade raise one of his finger and said " **Well, no thief should die stealing a piece of bread, a couple of hours in prison? Yes, but dead? Heck no"**

The moment he said so, the thief suddenly pull half of his mask up and slam her lips onto him, right in front of a chattering crowd, with mothers covering their childrens's eyes and men blushes as they witnessing the scene.

Back to Bell, who was looking at Crozzo with stars in his eyes before he nodded strongly "Yes! Of course you can join us…we eh…we're kinda short on members aswell"

Crozzo grinned brightly as he shook Bell's hand and said "You WON'T regret it, I'll do my best to help your and my new Familia grow"

Then, as Crozzo stand up, Wade was still being kissed by the thief in the background.

The redhead blacksmith then points his finger at a couple of Equipments shop owners across the streets who was staring at the two throughout the whole conversation and teases "SUCK ON THAT YA JERKS! THROW MY STUFFS INTO THE TRASH WILL YA? THAT'S WHAT YOU'LL GETT!"

Then, as he doing a couple of pelvis thrust at the irritated shop owners, a travelling merchant can be seen in the background pushing his cart, packed with merchandise and stopped right in front of Wade and the thief, then put the sign "Bussiness in progress" which is a rather silly and confusing way to say "Open for business".

The merchant doesn't seems to bother, nor seems to notice that Wade and the thief was having sex behind his cart as moans can be heard, while the men in the background was drooling, and the mothers can be seen covering their childrens eyes and ears at the same times as they quickly leave the scene with their faces tinted red.

After a couple of seconds, the thief can be seen leaping off onto the building's rooftop, while Wade steps out from behind the cart, with kiss marks all over his torso while he stretches. However as he does, he seems to be noticed something he frisk his own body for a moment before he grunted " **Aw Hell naw! She stole my Katanas…and my Pistols… meh, it was worth it…"**

Meanwhile, Logan can be seen sitting at a nearby bench,wearing a tank top,a pair of worn-out jeans and boots, with a cigar in his mouth. The man seems to have watches the whole thing as he shook his head and said "Ughhh… it's like fate forced this idiot on me or somethin' "

…

End of Chapter 16


	18. Pool Detective: Pilot

_**Chapter 17: Pool Detective: the pilot episode**_

 _ **Orario, Twilight's house…**_

As a rather soothing and slow Jazz melody plays in the background while Wade's masked face was shown up close, Wade's voice can be heard, speaking in a rather deep and serious tone as the view slowly zoom out " **It was just another dry, breezy and cloudy day in this city, nothing to do, nothing to look forward to, no possible new characters introduction… and…"**

Then, before he could finish his sentence, his monologue was interrupted when a palm collide with his cheek.

The background Jazz music suddenly stopped as Wade look down at Loki, who was only wearing a navy blue sport bra and a skimpy shorts, lying under him on the bed with a irritated expression on her face.

The goddess then said "Wade, what the heck did I tell you about OUR private times?"

Wade, who was only wearing a boxers and his Weapon X era mask replied " **Uhh, no monolouging?"**

Loki nodded as she continues "Yes, anddddd?"

Wade scratches his head before awkwardly replied " **Nothing slower than 5 thrusts per second?"**

Loki nodded once more as she said "No…but ehhh…now that you mention it, I can feel spiders building cobwebs down there ya motten head! What, you spend some extra times with the wife?"

Wade then began moving faster as he replied " **Nooo, I just.. been thinking…"**

Loki then cuts him off "Ahpahpahpah… no "open your heart" talk during sex,remember?"

…

 _ **20 minutes later…**_

The scene then shows Loki, snoring on her bed, looking very sastisfied while Wade, were putting his Weapon X era outfit back on as the soothing Jazz background music began to play once more.

As he does so, Wade look at his first lady-approved girlfriend scratching her tummy as he began monolouging " **What. A. Woman… just like my wife, but I need something more exciting, something that involve drama,a little bit action,black and white settings, and some plot twists…something more…Me"**

Wade then walks back to his room and sat on his couch and sighs with boredom.

However, he quickly went for his Rhino Revolver when he heard a click on the window.

As Wade points the sidearm at the intruder, his eyes slightly widened. It was the thief he encountered a couple of days ago, who was holding his Desert Eagle and was pointing it back at him.

Wade's eyes scan the woman in front of him,who was wearing a hooded robe, a sweater with patchework here than there, a canvas shorts shorts, accompanied by a pair of knee-high boots with spiked toe. A garterbelt can be seen on her thighs, with a holster containing a dagger attached to it.

The merc's thoughs can be heard once more " **That's…when she walks in…like an fallen angel from heaven's sleaziest bar, her red hairdo feels like it's burning my eyeballs off the moment I look at it, her eyes was cold, yet…filled with sorrow, she walks towards me, with my stolen pistol in her hand with elegance and confident…like that pizza girl in the "movie" I stumbled upon in Weasel's laptop… What comes out of her soft,soft lips next was just what I wanted to hear…"**

Right then, the thief said, in a slightly reluctant manner "Mister Deadpool? I…Please, help me…save my little sister…"

The moment she said so, the scene turns back to Wade, who somehow managed to out on his True Believers detective outfit, with the begie trenchcoat and matching fedora.

The merc then spoke with the same tone as his monologuing voice " **So you heard of me sweetcheeks?"**

The thief slowly lowered the stolen Desert Eagle as she replied "It's hard not to… you pissed off a lot of the criminals syndicates around this city…your head worth more than this whole castle last time I've heard…"

Wade seems flattered as he said " **Aw they shouldn't have… But anyway, this is not about me, so, tell me about your sister,what happened?"**

The thief then holster the Desert Eagle as she said "Before I do so, thanks for "giving" me this 'gun' thingy, I've been wanting one of these since I saw you use them on that…day… Anywho… It all started about a year ago…"

Her speech then become inaudible,as Wade's monologue and the background Jazz music quickly lap over her own voice " **At that moment, I was lost in her voice…and those legs… It's like Basic Instinct in 3D… That reminds me, Loki asked me to get some Mayonnaise… should probably do that later on, Oh and Ellie,it's her birthday today…shiiett I forgot to order the cake…Shiklah would KILL me if I forgot Ellie's cake"**

His monologue was interrupted by the thief as she asked "Mister Pool! Were you listening?"

Wade quickly snaps out of his trance and awkwardly look at her for a moment before he replied " **Uhhh yes… you suspect that your sister might have got involved with a dangerous gang, and she have been missing for an alarming period of time, you feared the worst for her, thus lead you to my office?"**

The thief rolled her eyes "Oh please, any moron out there could've have been able to make that lucky guess… But yes, that's how the story goes so far…as you can see, I can't ask the authority for help…since I…did kinda stole the Commisioner's golden pocket watch last week…"

Suddenly, Ellie opens the door, look at her dad and the strange lady sitting on his desk for a bit before she innocently said "Oh dad, step-mom told me to tell you that she needs your help with a broken faucet in her room"

Wade seems to know what's up, thus the merc nodded and said " **Is she now?"** before he turns to the thief and said " **Could you eh…gimme a couple of minutes?"**

The thief shrugs in reply, prompting Wade to walks toward the door where Ellie stood.

Once there, Ellie smiles brightly "Oh I forgot, miss Tiona and Tione wanted to take me fishing, can I go dad?"

Wade peck her on her forehead before he said " **Of course you can lil' princess, you want a bug zapper to bring along? It makes the fishing biz much easier"**

Ellie giggles as she shook her head "Nah, miss Tione said that's a disgraceful and unfair way to catch a fish, anyway, I'll catch a big one for you, see ya this evening dad" as she ran off.

Wade then closed the door behind him as he exited his room, leaving the thief alone inside. As she quickly got off the table and look around the room for something lootable, she was startled by a series of quakes and female moaning echoes across the hallway, not to mention the sounds of furnitures being smashes.

Then, after half an hour, Wade casually opens the door and returns to his room, whistling gleefully, not even noticed that the thief stole the silk blanket on his bed, a gold candlestick and his pinapple print Hawaiian shirt.

Wade then said to his "customer" " **That faucet have more problem than I thought, SO, back to be…I mean, any starting clue or infos I should hear about?"**

The thief then pulls out a drawn portrait of her younger sister and handed it to Wade as she said "This is what she looks like".

As Wade examine the portrait, his inner thoughts spoke once more " **One swift look and I can tell…they're not related…or are they…who knows…I mean this girl look NOTHIN' like the chick who was trying to steal my revolver by groping my butt as an distraction…wai…waittt, I guess they are sisters… I recognized those Marilyn Monroe-esque lips anywhere…although this one looks more like a Marry-ann Monroe than a Marilyn Monroe, look too innocent to be a President's backup chick…but oh Well, I got a picture,that should be an easy start…"**

Once Wade done thinking, he turn around, revealing his empty waist holster where his Rhino Revolver used to be and look at the thief, who was hiding his revolver behind her back and look with a coy smile as he said " **A'ight sweetcheeks, I'm interested, now, about the payment…"**

The thief look away slightly as she said "I…well…I don't have anything to offer you beside…" as she slowly reaches for the zipper on her shorts.

Wade quickly cuts her off " **Woahhhh hoah hoah hoahh, slow down dollface, just because I have a loving wife and a loving girlfriend, doesn't mean that I'll just do everything that moves… just buy me a beer and I'll call it even"**

The thief's cheeks blushes as she said "Oh…I…ok…" before she steps on the window's perch,preparing for her exit.

But before she takes her leave, she said "I'll wait for you near the pub where people last seen her… I drew a map on the back of my sister's portrait… bring some help if you want…" before the woman drop down from the perch, landing safetly on the ground below and dashes off.

Wade, who was watching his "customer" disappearing into the distance as he began monolouging again " **And just like that… she's gone, like a red, scared and lost butterfly wandering in the deep,dark jungle,acting tough, hoping to drove off the merciless predators that lurks in every bushes,alleys, backroom of some shady looking war antiques store….and probably public toilets… trying the best she can to hide her fear… fear of facing these.. gang members…who are these fiends? Drug dealers? Smugglers? Traffickers? Pedophiles? School principals? I'm about to find out…But first…"**

…

 _ **A while later, the streets of Orario…**_

The scene then show Wade, walking along the crowded street, looking quite serious, with both hands inside his trenchcoat's pockets as his inner thoughts spoke once more " **The client was right,** **I really am gonna need some help… That's why I'm gonna pay a dear friend of mine a visit… haven't seen the man in quite a while since our paths seperated, hopefully he's still got some Dudley Do-right spirit burning within his veins…"**

And with that, Wade stopped right in front of Mia's bar.

As the merc opens the door and walks in, he take a good look at all the patrons,with their eyes glued to him and their mouths chattering.

His inner thoughs spoke once more " **Gee, never seen a guy in a trenchcoat before?"**

Right then, he can hear Logan's voice from a corner of the bar saying "Playing detective again Wade?"

Wade turn to see Logan, in his tank top, jeans and boots serving drinks to a bunch of rich, but very attractive middle aged ladies, from the looks on his face, Logan isn't exactly enjoying his current status within Mia's bar.

Wade then walks toward his friend while his inner thoughts spoke " **He seems to do well…got his own un-required harem… but that's not gonna help the investigation.."**

Then, the scene shows Wade in a heated discussion with Logan about the case, as the Jazz music continues to play in the background and his inner thoughts can be heard talking over the two's conversation " **It wasn't easy to convince him to pick his claws back up…but I wasn't surprised, the man's a burn out, far too many kills, far too many dead girfriends…and farrr too many Tacos…Ughhh, I can smell it before he farts… He's a good man but… he'd rather acting cold and uncaring... I guess that's why the ladies loves him…strange standards really… anyway, I was about to give up hope asking for his help when suddenly…"**

Right as his inner thoughs said so, Lili suddenly pops out from behind the bar's counter,wearing a maid outfit, seems like she have been working here and seems to have heard the whole thing.

The short halfing girl, with a determined look on her face said "Mister Pool, Lili want to help, she can't just sit here and let a innocent girl being harmed by those animals, please, take Lili with you"

Wade's inner thoughs spokes " **Lili, the small loli with a heart and burning courage thrice her size didn't waste a second offering her help… her speed and knowledge will surely be more than useful for the case…"**

The moment Lili finished her statement and request, Logan sighs as he said "God dammit, I can't just let you go with him alone…FiNE, just THIS. ONCE! If you ever set foot into this bar asking me for help again…Ellie will have to wait an entire week for her father-daughter outing… until your arm grew back YOU…you are still welcomed as a paying customer thought"

Wade then wrap his arm around Logan's shoulder and said " **Awww I knew you couldn't resist"**

Logan then snarled "Please don't make me slice you to pieces on Ellie's birthday"

…

The scene then shows the trio walking down the streets, with a more up-tempo Jazz tune playing in the background and Wade's inner thoughs can also be heard " **And so, it begins… the three of us plunges ourselves into the unknown dangers ahead… with me, Deadpool, the private eye who have to be home by 7 PM to attend his daughter's birthday…"** as the scene zoom in on Wade, who was checking his Smith and Wesson Magnum 500 Revolver.

Then, the scene zoom in on Logan, who was trying to get a piece of gum out of his shoes for a bit before Wade's inner thoughs spoke " **Logan, aka the Wolverine, aka Master harem builder, aka Mister grouchy beard… the muscle of the team…and yes ladies, he's available, though chances are you'll probably be killed for the plot to develops"**

The scene then zoom in on Lili, who was checking a MP7 smg, which was given to her by Wade a bit before she accidentally shot a couple of short burts, startling everyone around, right then, the screen froze, and Wade's voice can be heard again " **And Liliruca, aka The Honey Badger, she might be small… but her gun isn't.."**

The scene then zoom out, fully showing all three of them walking in slow motion as Wade's voice can be heard again " **… man, this would look much cooler with an explosion in the background…too bad I left my grenades belt at home…"**

…

Then, the trio arrived in front of a shady looking bar,where the thief was waiting.

Once she spotted Wade and his friends, the woman cautiously look around before she walks toward them and said "Took your sweet times heh?"

Wade then said " **You know me sweetcheeks…"**

The thief rolls her eyes before she continues "Anyway, you guys need to be careful from here on out… I think I've been followed…quick…get inside, the owner should be alone at this time, I'll watch the door while you get whatever infos he got…"

Before the woman can reach for the bar's door knob, Logan said "Could we at least know your name lady?"

The woman sighs as she replied "Just call me Tanya" before she open the door and walks in.

True to her words, nobody was inside beside the owner, standing behind the counter, cleaning the drinking glasses. The man was around 50s, kind of fat and sport a comb-over. He wore a sleeveless shirt under an apron, exposing his hairy,fairly muscular arms.

What Wade and the team did not expect was that the moment the man saw him, he quickly duck below the counter for a brief second before coming backup with a crossbow of some sorts and fire it at the merc, causing Logan,Lili and Tanya to jump out of the way. Seems like this man was expecting Wade and Tanya's arrival,which made him an acomplice,or a member of the gang even.

The arrow plug Wade right in his heart, but not only Wade doesn't show sights he's in pain, the merc still casually pulls the picture of Tanya's siser out from his trenchoat and asked with a rather friendly and nonchalant voice " **Sorry to bother you on such a busy day,mac, but eh… have you seen this girl?"**

The owner began to sweat as he loads another arrow and shot at the approaching merc/detective, nailing him right in his left eye, but once again, Wade's still not flinch and is still adavancing toward the owner.

Once he finally sat down on the bar stool,in front of a trembling owner, Wade had one arrow in his left eye, one in his chest, another one in his right shoulders.

At that moment, Wade's inner thoughs can be heard " **The man's nervous…I have to be extra careful…one wrong spoken word and he might never spill the beans...and which I will force to spill his brain… I need to calm him down, play it cool, talks about weather, sports...get him to relax.."**

Wade then pulls the arrows out from his body and place them on the counter. Seeing that, the owner wet his pants right in front of Lili, Logan and Tanya who was standing near the door.

The merc then smiles while blood was gushing out from his left eye socket " **You eh..you drop these buddy…"**

The owner quickly grabs a dagger hidden under the counter and attempt to stab Wade, however, the merc's hands were faster, he grab and broke the owner's dagger-weilding hand, took the dagger then stabs the man's broken hand, right through the counter's wooden surface, pinning his hand onto the counter.

As the owner screams in agony, Wade said, still with a friendly tone " **Look mac, I don't want any troubles, I just want to know if you've seen this girl? You know, did she came here?"**

Wade didn't even notices a couple of thugs armed with crossbows just bust through the backdoor, however they were quickly mowed down by Tanya stolen pistols and Lili's MP7.

As Logan, Lili and Tanya can be seen walking through the backdoor,passing the dead bodies and head down a dark staircase, the owner, trying his best to bear with the pain as he answers "Ye…Yesss…"

As the owner said so, numerous gunshots and screams can be heard in the bar's basement.

Wade then said " **Ok? Did she went here alone? Or..or was she with someone else? You know, like…her boyfriend…girlfriend…boyfriend who dress and look like a girlfriend?"**

The owner began to shake as he look away "I…I can't…they'll fucking kill me if I…"

As he said so, 3 other thugs bust through the front door, but they wasn't much of a threat as Wade nonchalantly draw his Magnum 500 and punch a hole in each of their faces while saying " **Couldn't you kids see I'm having a conversation here?"**.

Having seeing the destructive power of the Magnum in Wade's hand, the owner began praying to every gods and goddesses he knows of, moments before the hot barrel of the magnum was just millimeters from his left eye.

Wade then drop the friendly tone as he said " **Who was she with?"**

It didn't take long for the owner to spill the beans as he said "She was alone at first, said she's waiting for her boyfriend, but then the Boss and his goons made a visit to check on the shipments…he notices her and just…proceed to take what he wants…the boyfriend never show up afterward…"

Wade was silent for a bit before he asked " **What…shipment?"**

Right as he asked so, about dozens of young girls,with only a rag wraps around their bodies exited the basement, with tears in their eyes and bruises on their bodies, this seems to be a clear case of trafficking ring.

Not long after the girls emerges from the basement's stair, Logan,with blood all over his body, dripping down the tips of his claws, Lili and Tanya soon emerges behind.

Wade then look at the girls before he tip his hat then turn back to the owner and said " **One last question, what do a bullet says to a face?"**

As the owner was confused by the weird riddle-like question, Wade pulls the trigger, blowing the upper part of his head off, splattering meats and brain bits all over the bottles of liquors places on the shelf behind him and causes the girls to scream.

As the lifeless body of the owner drop to the floor, he said " **You got your answer…"**

The merc then holster his Magnum, stood up and look at his teammates,along with the girls before he took a deep inhale and said with a refreshed and friendly tone " **Well, I'm sorry that you girls had to see that…and smell that…sorry, I had extra chilly Tacos with onions this morning…"**

As Tanya calm the girls down, Wade asked " **Did you girls…happen to remember or…know who exactly took you?"**

The girls slowly nodded their heads.

Wade nodded back as he shows the girls Tanya's sister portrait as he ask " **Did.. any of you girls saw her?"**

One of the girls spoke, weakly, due to still being in shock and scared "Sh…She's with the Boss… he…he keeps the girls he likes as personal…slaves… he check on us from time to time… if he likes what he sees…he takes it…"

Wade then said " **Gee…sounds like one of my old principals… So eh, do these scumbags has… a name?You know, gang signs, tattoos so people'll recognize them?"**

The girl said "…They don't have a name… although I did hear his goons keep mentioning a place called " _Haven of Purity"_ … I think it's a bar or something… I.. I don't know where it is but…Wherever the Boss is…the girl in that picture will surely be there,he never go anywhere without his "toys"…"

Wade nodded before he stood up and said " **Thank you"**

Tanya then said "I'll get these girls home, you boys just do what you must to find my sister, ok?"

Wade then turn to Lili and Logan before he said " **Welp, I guess we got a looot of interrogating and torturing work up ahead, you guys wanna grab some lunch before we start?"**

…

The scene then show a scared man being tied and hang upside down,with his pants all wet. He was screaming in fear as he look at Logan who was swing his claw senslessly while moving around aimlessly, with his eyes being blindfolded, like a person trying to hit a Pinata.

Wade and Lili can be seen looking at the tied-up man, with Wade saying " **Like I said buddy, the more you say no, the more accurate my guide will be…TO the LEFT a BIT LOGAN!"**

…

The scene then show Wade shoving a shotgun's barrel into a thug's butt, causing him to scream in pain as the merc said " **It's IN Todd, You got TWO more chances until I pull the trigger"**

As he does so, Lili can be seen covering her eyes in the background as she whispering to herself "Don't look at his butthole, don't look at his butthole, don't look at his butthole, don't look at his butthole…"

…

The scene then show Lili and Wade walking around a chair-bounded thug with a black eye and swollen lips. Wade suddenly stops and said to the thug " **Listen mister I'm-a-loyal-guard-dog, I got 3 more hours until I have to attend my daughters birthday so could you please do me a favor and spill the beans? It'd be easier for both of us…I won't have to waste anymore time and you get to keep your life…but not your nightsick though…SO, semi-last chance, WHERE's THIS "Haven of PURITY"? "**

The thug look at Wade and shouted "FUCK YOU AND YOUR DAUGHTER, WE'LL GET HER SOON ENOUGH!"

That is not what Wade wanted to hear, thus the merc told Lili "You heard him Lili…"

Lili then smiles demonically as she pulls out a magic dagger,which seems to be aguemented with the Lightnight element.

As she points the dagger at the thug's crotch she said "Don't worry, Lili'll makes sure you'll feel every bit of this…"

…

Then, around late at noon, Wade, Lili,Logan and Tanya can be seen standing in front of their destination, the "Haven of Purity", which was a rather large and fancy looking bar that reside in the working-class area of Orario, completely stands out from all the other buildings around the neighborhood.

Tanya was really nervous as she gulped,while Logan was cracking his neck as his claws slowly pops out from his fists.

Lili was drawing two black stripes below her eyes, like a soldier putting on warpaint before entering combat.

Wade on the hand was peeing against one of the plants at the front entrance while his inner thoughs can be heard " **So this is it… the source of all these missing young women, None of us know what's waiting inside, but I do know that it's not gonna end well for them… I only got an hour left, better wrap this case up quickly…Man I though there would be a much more dramatic and better story development than this Michael Bay's Transformer saga quality shit…"**

Wade then pull his zipper up and said to the team " **Aight people, here's the plan, we storm in, kill them all and rescue the girls…That's it, that's the plan…since I only got an hour left and everything…"**

Logan smirks "For once Wade, I like your plan"

Lili cock her MP7 and said "Lili think she just had an orgasm"

Her statement made the others look at her with a wierded out look before Wade casually walks toward the door and knocks on it.

A rough and scary voice can be heard from the other side "What's your business here?"

Wade replied " **Room service"**

The voice on the other side replied with a confusing tone "What?"

Next thing the thugs inside the bar knows was Logan's claw pierced through the door and the guard's skull, killing him.

Then, Logan slice the door to pieces before he charges inside.

Instead of helping, Wade, Lili and Tanya just stood outside and watches as Logan slaughters the thugs inside while painting the bar's walls and floor red with their own blood.

As the captured girls ran out of the place, Wade pointed at a man, quite fat,hairy and tall running out the back of the bar, dragging a young girl in chain with him.

Tanya instantly recognized her sister as she shouted "KATTT! KATT!"

The young girl,while being drag away, still managed to turn around to see her sister before she shouted back "TANYA! HELP ME! HELPPP!"

Tanya gritted her teeth before dashes after the two without saying a word.

Wade then look at Lili and said " **C'mon, I think Logan can find his way home later… that's the convinient thing about stories like this, for some reason, no matter how much of a mess you made, once the chapter ends, some…magical force is gonna fix 'em allllll up.."**

Wade then look at the readers and said " **I mean…remember those old cartoon shows? They blew half a city up and the NEXT episode, which took place like a day after the last episode and BAM the city is still intact, as if no psychopath've ever turned half of it into a smaller version of Detroit"**

Lili then taps Wade's shoulder as she said "uhhh mister Pool, Lili think we should go and help Tanya"

Wade replied " **Oh, right, right…"** before both of them ran after Tanya and the gang leader, leaving Logan inside with the thugs, with a thug can be heard screaming "Not the FACE NOT THE FACEEAGHHHHHHHHH!" from outside of the establishment.

…

The chase lead Wade and Lili to a dead end, where Tanya can be seen on the ground, holding a knife being plunged into her shoulder.

Lili quickly crouched down and gently removes the knife and apply some healing power in her satchel bag on Tanya's wound as the redhead woman screamed at the gang leader "I swear if you FUCKING TOUCH HER…"

The gang leader then lick Kat's neck, causing her to cry and trembles with fear before he speak "You'll what?"

Tanya shrieked as she shot up and draw Wade's Desert Eagle from her hip holster and pointed it at the brute, who quickly draw his dagger and put the sharp blade right next to Kat's neck as he said "If I die, so will she"

The moment he said so, a bullet flew right into the left side of his head, blowing it to pieces and splatter blood onto Kat's face.

As Tanya and Kat still froze by the shock, the leader's body drop to the ground.

The three turned to see Wade, with his Magnum 500's barrel still smoking in one hand, while he was checking his watch on the other hand before he said " **Sheesh, I hate these hostage gigs the most… wasted like half an hour just staring at each other until some "miracle" happens and help the main character save the day..and the dame…"**

Tanya quickly run toward her sister and hug her as tight as she could, Kat also did the same as she sobs loudly.

Wade on the hand had disappeared from the scene, leaving Lili, Tanya and her sister still hugging each other in the alley.

As the scene show Wade, running as fast as he could, carrying a big, 3 layer birthday cake across the streets of Orario, his inner thoughs can be heard " **Well, I guess the case is closed, nothing close to a Hollywood material story but hey,a bunch of bad guys were killed and the dame was rescued…actually it was around 50 dames…and one boy… were rescued…Not sure if all of them make it home safely though…I should get on that later on…But first things first…"**

Right as his thoughs reaches that part of the monologue, Wade finally arrived at the Twilight House's entrance, he kicked the door open and said " **Daddddddyyyy's homeeee!"**

Looks like Wade was home in time, Ellie gleefully wave at him and said "DAD! Look at the fish I caught!" as she pick up a dish with a fried piranha-like fish on it among all the food on the table that everyone in Loki's Familia cooked for Ellie's party and show it to her father.

Shiklah and Loki both approaches Wade,who was still holding the cake, with Loki whispered into his ear "My room…in an hour" while Shiklah whispered "Her room…in an hour"

Then, as Wade joins everyone at the table, the screen zoom out slowy with his inner thoughs speaking in the background " **AH yes, nothing compares to coming home to your loving wife…and your soon-to-be-wife, your adorable little princess and the family members that you never really known or talked to after a long, hard day…Yep, you can write all you want ya jerk, nothing you throw at me right now can POSSIBly ruin this moment ….. AW SHIT I FORGOT THE MAYO!"**

… **.**

End of Chapter 17

…


	19. Girls day out pt1

_**Chapter 18: Girls day out Part 1**_

 _ **Warning: Massive amount of one-time special guests ahead**_

 _ **Orario, The Twilight House…**_

"… **And That's why there were no Dinosaurs left…such.. beautful,majestic…and creatures…Cut DOWN in their primes and peak of their civilization…Just because The Big Guy decided to throw a fast ball…"** said Wade as he sat in front of Ellie, Gareth, Finn and Riveria in the main hall table, with Gareth, for some reason was weeping and slowly clapping his hands after hearing about the rise and fall of the Dinosaurs.

Ellie on the other hand whispered to Finn "It's true, he and I accidentally went back in time once to save his friend, I got to ride a Triceratop…well, before the poor thing were vaporized… It was so cute too…" with an excited tone.

Wade then said " **Alright kids, story times over… say eh… anyone seen the wonder twin? It's their turn to babysit Ellie this week… she likes them the most"**

Finn was tying Ellie's hair into a princess-like braid as he said "Oh they've been in their room with Lefiya since this morning… they said they found something interesting in your bag"

Wade said " **Did you hear weird noises coming from their room?"**

Riveria nodded "As a matter of fact,yes I did… it rather sounds like…little girls crying…"

Wade seems to understand what's going on as he shrugs " **I see they found my Stark Tech Holo Pad…and the "Shiklah's favorite movies" folder… oh please~~~don't let them stumbled onto Shiklah's "kink" folder… no mortal minds could comprehend what kind of shit she's into…Ughhh… "**

The moment he said so, the scene shows Tiona,Tione and Lefiya sitting on the bed,with their eyes soaking wet and glued to the holo screen which was showing the film Titanic with Tiona saying "WHY?WHY did Jack has to die?" as she bite her pillow

Lefiya added in "THERE Were Clearly enough space for him on that wooden platform! WHY DIDN'T HE CLIMB ON?" with two waterfalls stream water down her eyes.

The scene then show the girls, still glued their eyes to the holoscreen, this time with the Original Star Wars Trilogy being showed. With Lefiya screamed "HO..HOW CAN THIS BE? HOW CAN DARTH VADER BE LUKE's FATHER… It's… It's IMPOSSIBLE!"

Then, the scene shows the girls, all biting their pillows as they flood the room with tears while the holoscreen shows the final scene of Return of the Jedi, with Darth Vader,now redeemed and on the verge of death, speaking to his son "…Just for once…let me look at you…with my own eyes"

Once again, the scene changes to another time period of the day, but with the view being from outside the girls room. Soon after the scene started, the castle was shooked by the girls screaming "KHHHHHHAAAAANNNNNN!" out loud.

…

The scene then switch back to Wade and the others,with him saying " **Okkkkiieee…. Looks like someone have to take her place… see I promised rabbit-head boy that I'll grind the Dungeon with him and his new partner… some… red headed Samurai with a big ass sword,to be honest he looked like some discounted Extras from Final Fantasy but that's not important…see…"**

Riveria suddenly cuts him off "I'll take on this task mister Wade"

Wade seems a bit surprised as he said " **Really? …I mean… you don't look like someone who…you know? Babysits…"**

Riveria then said "Perharps you forgot all about that… elves babies incident… if memories served me right, I was the one who saved you from their "pestering"… I think I'm perfectly capable of "babysit" your daughter for today… she's not like you so I believe it won't be a challenge at all"

Wade then stares at Riveria for a bit before he shrugs and head out the door, with a AA-12 in his hand, leaving Riveria who sighs "I take that as an agreement"

…

 _ **The Street of Orario,around noon…**_

"I was Too…if it wasn't for that meddling midget…" grunted Hestia,wearing her normal outfit,with Jealousy nowhere in sight as she walks next to Hephaestus who was gluing her eyes onto another issue of Punisher MAX.

While there was no answer from Hephaestus, Lili's voice suddenly comes up "Hey, Lili's right ya know?"

The view then pan to the left of Hestia then pan down a bit, revealing Lili, who was walking next to the two, with her hood up and the MP-7 Wade gave her can be seen dangling over her shoulder.

Hephaestus bluntly replied with her eyes still glued to the comics "Why can't you two share him?"

Both Hestia and Lili replied in perfect synchronization "WITH THIS SLUT? NO WAY!"

Hestia then look at Hephaestus for a moment before she said "Oh I almost forgot Hep, you're actually ok with your boy…Crozzo, to join my Familia?"

Hephaestus replies as she turns the pages "Yes, I think he would be best for him to roll with you…well, your boy…frienddd I mean…"

Hestia slightly blushes while Lili pouted at Hephaestus's comment.

This prompted her to continue "He's… he got such a tremendous talent and potential…but…for some reasons, he refuses to let it bloom… you DO know what the Crozzos are known for right?"

Hestia scoffed "If I didn't I would've kicked your boy out"

Hephaestus look at Hestia for a good 2 seconds before she continue "That's the point… he could have been among the high-ranking members of my Familia a year ago but… he just… I don't know, I knew it has something to do with his Family name and past but…he always dodge the subject whenever I tried to get him to open up to me about WHY he hated Magic Weapons and the act of creating them so much…"

Hestia raised her eyebrow before replying "Sooo…you're basically dumping him on my Familia?"

Hephaestus shrugs "Call it what you want… maybe living with you guys…minus Wade would actually inspire him to finally allow his gift to shine…"

The moment she said so, Hestia's eyes squinted and a frown formed on her face as she saw Loki walking toward the three, accompanied by Aiz. The large chested goddess then mumbles "I swear that talking cuttingboard is stalking me or something…"

Loki seems to have heard Hestia's remarks as she smirks "Oh I can't lie…I'm just crazzzzeee about you ya purple-slime-wearing cutie"

Hephaestus decided to stay out of the "confrontation" as she continues to read the comics, Lili was completely clueless of Loki and Hestia's rivalry as she just stood there and look at the two awkwardly.

Loki tries to hide her irritation with a forced smile while saying "So… how's the boy? Word is he killed a infant Dragon with one hit yesterday…you're still certain you didn't remodelled him?"

Hestia didn't even try to hide her irritation while she replied with a creepy, menaching voice "Oh fine,fine… how's that red idiot?"

Loki flick her short hair before replying "Oh you know, still as good as the first time…"

Hestia seems to understand what her rival meant by that, the large chested goddess just stared at Loki for a good minute before she asked "Wait…You…and HIM?"

Loki proudly nodded.

Hestia then asked "You know he's married…right? I'm just wanna make sure that you didn't drugged him with Aphrodite's love potion or anything… I mean you DID pulled that gig on Helios remember?"

Loki then said "Oh I met his wife alright…wonderful lady really… both in personality and…bedroom skills…"

Hestia seems grossed out as she said "Well I've always suspected it anyway…"

Loki raised one of her eye brow "Suspected what?"

Hestia shrugs "Oh nothing…I've always thought you're only into… women"

Before Loki can retort, a portal briefly open behind her. The moment it does, it spit out two being, one seems to be a female human, wearing a pink and white leotard with ammo pouches attached around the waist, a white mask with pink eyes visors and a pair of pink sneakers,with kevlar pads being strapped around to protect her legs from the knee down.

The girl was whacking her M16A1 repeatedly onto the head, a massive head to be precise, it turns out it was MODOK Superior and Gwenpool, the mysterious girl from the "Real world" as she claimed in her records who recently took residence in Earth-616 and start living the life of a mercenary,much like Wade.

As the portal quickly collasped, Gwen still haven't bother look around as she jab the M16A1's butt into MODOK's eyes while shouting " _ **Give. Me. Back. That. Crystal ya egghead! I did NOT spent 2 weeks hiding in A.I.M's staff's bathroom and chew on those disgusting non-glutton potato chips leftovers for this crap!"**_

MODOK, despite having his face pummeled and most of his teeth knocked out and his forehead Psinonic blast crystal was shattered as a result, snarled back "And I Did NOT-OW spent the last-OW 2 weeks recovering my body parts with only my-OW-OW HEAD which YOU-OW __threw down the city's sewer! I still got the taste in my mouth you traitorous wench!"

Gwen then replied as she jab the barrel of her rifle into MODOK's nose " _ **Well I would have dumped you down the city's river's radioactive part near my neighborhood but it's too much work having to roll your big head across the highway like and idiot and everything…beside, It was all you can drink Slushie night… Now be a gooood Micheal Bay version of Humpty Dumpty and give me that crystal…oh pretty please?"**_

MODOK look away for a moment before he said "Alright…since you asked nicely…"

Then suddenly, MODOK spit a purple crystal out from his mouth, this one looks much different from the ones that send Wade,Logan,Shiklah and Ellie into Orario, it has a tube-like shape and glow intensely.

Due to the high velocity of MODOK's spit, the crystal hit Gwen on her forehead before she could catch it, knocking her down from his head.

Not wasting this window of opportunity, MODOK punches Gwen in the face, knocking her off of his head then quickly roll his massive head toward the Crystal, attemping to retrieve it, only to his hand shot by Gwen's rifle.

However that didn't stop him as MODOK quickly tries grab it his other hand,once again only to get his remaining hand stepped on by Gwen.

Much to MODOK's anger, Gwen whistle gleefully as she pick up the crystal before kicking him in the face and said " _ **THAT'S for killing Cecil"**_

Gwen then raises her M16 and shot MODOK in the hand again, causing him to yelped in pain before saying " _ **And THIS is for not inviting me to your birthday, ya nerd"**_

She then walk away, juggling the crystal in her hand playfully while saying " _ **Oh man, wait til Ronnie sees this, easiest 500.000 Bucks and 2 Taco Bell coupon I have ever made…"**_

But before Gwen was able to work out how to activate the stone, MODOK activates his hovering unit's jets and launches himself toward her, grabbing both her and the crystal as they went flying.

Back to the girls,who was still in awe of what's happening in front of them, Hestia said "Is it just me or…does that girl kinda reminds me of someone?"

Loki on the other hand replied "Either I went crazy or the jibberish about this so-called "Plots and developments" thingie which Wade yaps about every Tuesday drinking competition starting to make sense…"

Hephaestus still seems pretty chill as she keep reading the comic while mumbling _"…Some days are good, some days are bad. And you can only live with whatever life you have left…_ heh…I like to see you try and write something better than THAT, Apollo…"

Back to Gwen and MODOK, who were still struggling with each other as the flew around the city's streets uncontrollably, with Gwen repeatedly punches MODOK's left eye, while she could have just use the pair of Ninja swords she got holstered on her back, MODOK on the other hand was trying his best to keep the crystal tight in his grip while he spins, barrel rolling in the air times after times, attempting to shook Gwen off of him but to no avail so far.

Then, MODOK took a 180 degree turn and head straight at the girls, with Gwen now trying to bite his hands.

Lili was sweating as she said "Uhhhh…. Lili think we should move out of the way…like…Now!"

The moment she said so, the girls were all caught in MODOK's flight path as his jet's repulsions increases theirs output, thus increasing the speed.

As they were stuck on MODOK's massive head, Loki sighs, Aiz didn't even move an inch of her face muscle, Hephaestus still nonchalantly reading the comic, Lili was screaming her butt off while Hestia couldn't help but blushing as Gwen, whose face was "stuck" between the goddess's well-endowed breasts. To add to the awkwardness of the whole ordeal, Gwen even said " _ **Smmoooooooooooth Symbiote**_ _**slime"**_

Just when things couldn't get any worse, the crystal suddenly glow brightly. But instead of shattering and generate a portal like before, this crystal just warp its glow around the group before it "shoot" out a portal, which the whole bunch flew right in just a split second after it's opened.

The moment the girls and MODOK landed on what seems to be a concrete surface, the portal immedietaly collaspe behind them.

As the camera zoom out, revealing New York City's Times Square, swarmed with a small army of armed AIM agents with the barrels of their rifles pointed at the girls,who were struggling to get back up.

Gwen,with the crystal finally back in her hand look around a bit before she look at MODOK, who float away from the group and toward his men while saying "Well, from what I see…little Gwen, I'm the one who got the upper hand here as you can already see… So, give me back the crystal…and I'll spare your…ehhh…whoever the heck they are to you…I'll still have to vaporize you thought…" with a confident grin.

Gwen didn't waste a moment before she shrugs " _ **Meh, go ahead, we just accidentally brought them here thanks to the bad story writing…I don't know any of them…well, 'cept for the Symbiote suit on the twin tail but the rest of them ain't no friend of mine…"**_

MODOK quickly replied "Welp, save me the trouble ultilizing my negotiating and lying skills at the same time… KILL THEM!"

While every single AIM agents, minus one guy who was speaking into his smartphone "OH C'MON,MOM, I told you to not to call me between 5 PM and 12AM…OK,Ok I know…geez, why can't you ask dad…or that MAILman to get you some Tampons?..." cocks their rifles and pointed at the girls, with Aiz and Loki get on their battle stance.

However, before they can unleashe the bullet hailstorm on the group, a rocket propelled grenade landed right in the middle of the AIM agents barricade, killing many and disrupt their formation.

MODOK sighs as he grunted "Oh what now?"

As he said so, an armored black van drove right through the AIM agents formation and make a full stop right next to the girls, with an AIM agent glued onto the front bumper due to the impact.

MODOK seems to recognize the van as he said "Wait a min That's.."

Before he could finish his sentence, the slide door on one side of the van the van slide open, and behide it was Frank Castle, this time wearing his signature skull t-shirt, black cargo pants, combat boots and a leather trench coat, and most of all, an belt-fed M60 in his hand with the barrel pointed at the baddies in yellow.

Frank crack his neck and said with a deep, menacing voice "Smile for the camera…" before he held down the trigger, sending a hail storm of bullet at the Agents and MODOK, who quickly move further behind his men,using them as meat shield as they being tore apart.

The panicking AIM agents return fire, but only managed to hit his van and grazed his jacket.

Once the M60 ran empty, Frank quickly put it aside and switch to his customized M4A1 and open fire while saying "Get on the Van pinkie! You girls too"

Loki quickly retort with a frown "Woah woah, who're you calling a "girl", kid?"

Aiz didn't waste a moment grabbing Loki by her hand and drag the goddess onto the van with the others. Gwen quickly made her way into Frank's van aswell,but not before tumbled on the ground,due to a bullet ricocheted off of the street's surface and grazed her left thigh. Frank roll his eyes then grab her hand and pull the girl inside.

Once that's done, Frank switches to a China Lake grenade launcher and shot at the group, causing further disarray among their formation when the grenade detonated before closing the door and speed away.

After Frank's van was out of sight, MODOK look back at his men and said irritatingly "I can't believe I'm still paying you IMBECILE after all those years… SHE's just ONE GIRL in a PINK SWIMSUIT! ONE!"

He then attempted to kick a small debris on the street, however, all he got was a sharp pain in his foot, causing him to yelped and.

However, as he does so, MODOK's eyes lit up as he notices the crystal,lying on the floor where Frank's van parked earlier, it must have fell off of Gwen's hand when she fell down.

A big smile formed on his face as MODOK said "Well, at least we recovered the crystal…"

Then, he turns toward his employees and said "Return to HQ at once…we can't stall this plan any longer"

…

 _ **Meanwhile, inside Frank's big black van…**_

" _ **Gee, thanks for the rescue mister grouchy hunky widow… I could have diedddd backk there if it wasn't for youuuu"**_ said Gwen with a sarcastic tone as she stretches.

Frank,still keeping his eyes on the road replied "What the heck were you doing with that thing kid?"

Gwen replied " _ **Oh some creep tweeted me about a retrieval and deliver job, hefty payment and no deadline, how can I say no?By the way, shouldn't you be in Hell's Kitchen, diggings holes for and ON the "scums of the earth" or something?"**_

Frank then said "Day off…Matt told me to cool off for a few day,seems reasonable so I listened…Look, Did this "creep" happens to mentioned the fact that THAT thing in your hand is a interdimensionl portal generator?"

Gwen shrugs once more " _ **Sure did"**_

Frank was a bit surprised as he asked "..and…this does not concern you? Not even a bit?"

Gwen nonchantly replied " _ **Hey C'mon, it'll be fine… trust me, Even in case the client turns out to be some angry Sjw douche who's dead set on exacting vengence on humanity because someone disagreed with him…he won't be able to pull it off…Beside…it's not like the Crystal is IN MY POSSESSION anyway… I can't believe I dropped it…Guess Ronnie was right about bringing that fanny pack…"**_

Frank raised one of his eyebrow as he stops at a red light and said "…and what makes you think that?"

Gwen replied " _ **You wouldn't understand if I told you… Thor learned it the hard way…"**_ as she reloading her M16.

Frank sighs "I missed Wade already…" as he adjust his rearview mirror until it reflecting the images of Hestia,Lili,Loki,Aiz and Hephaestus, looking a bit confused due to all the crazy ordeal happening so quickly,one right after another.

The professional vigilante then asked "So, who're you kids?"

Loki quickly snarled back "I have you know we…save for this blonde beauty is much,much,much,much older than YOU or your ancestor…You,are talking to Loki, the Goddess of Mischief!at least shows some respect"

Frank didn't reply, prompting Hestia to say "Oh, anyway, I'm Hestia…Goddess of hearth, nice to finally meet you mister Castle,I've heard a lot about you…"

Frank seems a bit intrigued as he asked as his van took a turn "You're from the other side of that portal?"

Hestia nodded, but before she could say anything, Loki quickly move closer behind him and gently placed her hands on the side of his head.

Frank, still quite chill about Loki's action, asked "What're you doing?"

Loki replied "Telepathy… if I would explain to you about our world,ourselves and how we got here…your brain would have a baddd cramp… its better if I show you…just take a deep breath and…."

The moment she said so, both of her hands starts to glow with a leafty green light, startling Frank as he threw his head back agaisnt his seat while his eyes glows with the same color as Loki's aura. In addition, upon impulse, he briefly lost control of the van and drift it around a bit before he managed to floor the brake pedal, putting the van to a full stop in front of what seems to be a groceries store.

While Lili was marveling at Frank's arsenal being placed around the back of his van, Loki still got her magic gripping Frank's mind, however, something seems to have went wrong as Loki's expression changes, she looks distraught and starts trembling before she finally broke the connection and fall back onto Aiz's arm.

Frank shook his head a few times to pull himself together before glaring at her with a angry look on his face. Seems like the Goddess of mischief have been peeking at Frank's personal memories.

Loki,with a single tears rolling down her cheek can only look back at him and said, with a whispery voice "I…I didn't mean to…my apo…my apology…"

Hestia rolled her eyes "Wow Loki, I didn't you could be succcchhhh a nosy grandma…"

Loki didn't replied as he quickly gathered herself and asked "have you got what you needed?"

Frank sighs before he turned back to the steering wheel and replied "Yea, so that idiot's there too huh?…"

Loki smiled "…He's quite an handful…"

Frank then look back at Hephaestus, who was looking at him with a starstruck eye and a barely visible blush on her face as he said "So you're Hephaestus huh?...always though you're a guy…"

Hephaestus didn't know how to replied, that is if she's able to.

Hestia then wave her hand in front of Hephaestus's eye then snap it a couple of times while Lili repeatedly pinching her cheek, trying to get her out of whatever trance she was in for a good minute before Hestia awkwardly said to Frank "She's uh…she's a fan of your work…"

Frank raised his eyebrow before he said "That's a first…"

Then, Lili raised her hand before akwardly said "Ummm….Lili…Lili need…uhhh…Lili need to go Peepee"

As everyone look at Lili, Gwen can be seen snoring near the van's back door,hugging her M16 and uses an ammo box as a pillow.

…

 _ **End of part 1**_


	20. Girls day out pt2

_**Chapter 18: Girls day out pt2**_

 _ **(Gwenpool: Hiya! I'm Gwenpool, you might have know…and probably loathed me from "Deadpool's secret secret war"and "Howard the Duck #19: Adventure into Fear" because of my horrible backstory,gender, characteristic AND my outfit but I'm here to stay SO SUCK IT UP!I mean…I don't see anyone complaining about the fact that a god damn generic police officer who looked like he's 2 weeks from retirement just went on and arrest Thanos WITHOUT any mass-destruction incident once right? Anyway, as you can see, the moron who wrote this crap just couldn't resist putting me and Grouchy Frankie here into this "speecialll~~~~ crossover oneshot",so just bear with it until this chapter end, Love ya all~~~~not likely)**_

 _ **19:00 PM, New York city, some random groceries store which could have been where Uncle Ben was shot…**_

"Wow… they actually eat these things?" said Loki as she holding a Protein Bar and reading the ingredients imprinted on the wrapper.

Frank can be seen putting a bunch of canned food into the shopping basket as he replied "For muscleheads who only wanted to flaunt their abs instead of using them…"

Loki shrugs as she threw it back onto the shelf and said "looks like a pretty fucked up world…"

Frank nearly flash a smile as he replied "You have no idea…"

Hephaestus on the other hand was staring at the squishie machine blender, slowly spinning while everyone in the stores awkwardly stares at her.

Hestia was reading some magazines on the shelves next to the cashier counter as she mumbles "What kind of retarded sicko would call this art?" as the camera view switches to her shoulder-view, revealing a poster of Kim Kadashrian's infamous "internet breaking" photo.

Aiz was standing next to Hestia, looking at a kitten calendar placed on the cashier counter,with her cheeks slightly blushes.

Then, as Frank puts all of his purchased goods on the counter for the young female,freckled covered-face clerk swipe them through the barcode scanner, a bearded man, wearing a black beanie, sunglasses and a black biker-esque outfit walks in and head toward the cashier counter.

The suspiscious man stood next to Frank, seemingling doesn't recognize him, seeing as he casually pulls out an 44. Caliber revolver and points it at the cashier, who drops the canned pork and beans she was holding and threw her hands in the air before he snarled "Empty that…"

Before the robber could even reaches the third word in his sentence, Frank grab the back of his head with one hand, then grab his uzi-toting hand with his remaining arm,twist it forcefully then slam the bastard's head down on the edge of the counter, smashing his face and kills the robber in the process, in front of a shocked shoppers, including some guy who was trying to steal some snacks.

As the trembling young clerk slowly lower her hands and lean over the counter and look at the bloody corpse of her would be robber, Frank took a pack of bandges, place it the counter and said "I'll take this too"

The clerk struggles to pull herself together as she said "OH-oh…oh yes,yes of course…I..I'll get right on it..mister Punisher…than…thank you"

Then, as the clerk continue swiping Frank's goods, Loki can be heard whispering to Hephaestus "She wants him…I can see it on her face…"

Hephaestus's eyes still glued to Frank as he was slowly tapping his boot on the floor, until a rather extra extra extra extra large lady,in her early 40s bumps into her and Loki, and Hestia, pushing them out of the line they were in and stood right behind Frank with only a box of Cookies in her hand.

Loki was the first to voice her protest "Hey excuse you, insolent mortal, I was next in line"

The lady nonchalantly replied "But you weren't gonna buy anything, what's the point of taking up the lines?"

Loki then said "That's not the point, it's about personal… Damn… how can you DO this to your body?"

The lady replied,seemingly offended "I have you know,twerp, this is the ideal body for the next issue of Miss Plus size mag, You happen to be looking at the next top Plus size model"

Hestia then interjected "I don't know… you should be the next Miss "Starts exercising or this could be you" with that… ungodly body… even Fenrir would flee and wimper like a pup if witness this…"

The lady's face slowly turn red as she snarled "How dare You! I happen to be a professional swimmer for your information! Why, last week I did a record of 2.5 Kilometers swim in the beach of Miami"

Hestia then bluntly replied with a skeptical look on her face "There's a fundamental difference between swimming and SINKING ya know?"

Loki seems impressed as she said to Hestia "For once,brat… we both agree on something" while looking at the shocked, and obviously angry face of the big lady in front of them.

Right at that moment, Lili bust out from the Toiler's door and casually walks toward Frank,without knowing that a long sheet of toilet paper have stuck to her shoes as she does.

Frank rolls his eyes slowly before taking the bag of purchased goods and said "Alright, let's go…"

As they walk out, Loki can be seen snatching the robber's sunglasses from his bloody face and put into her satchel bag before running after the others.

…

 _ **Later that night, in front of Big Ronnie's Custom Battle Spandex…**_

As Frank got off the van, he look at the establishment for a bit before saying "Isn't staying here's a bit…. Revealing?"

Gwen, who was stretching after her nap while walking toward the door said " _ **Yea, but nothing's ever gonna happen here,trust me**_ …"

The girl then adjust the M16 slinging over her shoulder and knocks on the door as she humming some random tune.

Then, the door slightly open, revealing a middle aged woman,around 40s, with long, straight,silky black hair, blue eyes, she's wearing a below-the-knee long lavender dress with a pearl necklace on her neck and a rather grumpy expression on her face, assuming that she recognized who was knocking on her door.

Gwen then sheepishly wave at the woman and said " _ **Heyyyyy, Ronnie,I'm home**_ "

The woman, who turns out to be the owner, Ronnie herself didn't reply as she look at Frank and the Goddesses before bluntly said "What?You and Punisher rescued Cosplayers from pedophiles rapist ring or something?"

Ronnie's frown's getting more well-defined as she heard Gwen said " _ **Ohhh…well nooot…exactly, we just… kinda need a place to crash for tonight…and by we I mean them… Frank can sleep in your room**_ "

The woman then bluntly replied "Do I look like Captain America?"

Gwen akwardly replied " _ **Nooo, but you look like a kinnndd, caring….charitable, kinda grumpy, old-fashioned,odd lady with a heart of**_ …" with a innocent grin and sparkling eyes.

But before she can finish her sucking-up-to speech, Ronnie cuts her off "Cosplayer girls can stay in your room, Punisher sleep on couch, get inside"

Gwen shrugs "works for me" as she skips inside, while Loki points at Ronnie,saying "For your information kid, we're goddesses" as she walk pass her.

Ronnie's expression didn't even change a bit as she bluntly replied "I made costume for girl who can buy coffee from across the street with one hand while still standing in shop, you don't scare me, just get inside"

Loki just look at Ronnie for a moment before she said "I admire your bravery mortal, SO, you make armors for adventurers here?"

Ronnie replied "No, I make battle SPAandexxxx~~~ for people with super powers and people who think they got super powers, you want armor? Go see Stark"

Loki then tilt her head "Who's this… Stark?"

Ronnie replied "Founder of Avengers, millionaire,playboy,philantropist"

Loki then said "Sounds…like a pretty stand-up guy…"

Ronnie bluntly replied "Not always…"

As she said so, Hestia can be seen checking a mannerquin with a purple costume on it as she said "Sheesh, adventurers in this realm sureee have some weird taste in protections.."

Having saw that, Ronnie said "Now all I need is Thor knocking on door and ask to fix boots"

…

 _ **Much,much,much later that night…**_

"I gotta say…how did you do this to your hair?" asked Hestia as she running her hand across Gwen's pink dip-dyed part of her hair as the girls awkwardly lying all over the floor in Gwen's room.

Gwen, now in her casual clothes, a pair of pink shorts, a white t-shirt with Captain America's shield imprinted on it, lying next to Hestia and being used as a pillow by a snoring Loki replied " _ **I dyed it**_ "

Hestia look at Gwen for a moment with confusion in her eyes for a moment before she shrugs and asked "Sooo… I heard that lady…Ronnie right? Mentioned Thor…you guys also live among the gods here too?"

Gwen replied _**"Yes…but not really... 'among' them, see the Asgardians lives in Asgard most of the time…they rarely visit or interfere with mortals affair unless it's some serious biz like giant apocalyptic-loving monster attacking orrr Deadpool's shennanigans…well 'cept for Thor, she's part of the Avengers so she's hangout on Earth quite a lot…"**_

Hestia seems a bit surprised as she said "Woah woah, Thor's a woman here?"

Then, Loki's voice startled the two as she asked "My blockhead brother is a woman in this realm? This I gotta see…"

Gwen then said " _ **Well…not until recently anyway…it was Thor Odinson who was Thee Thor until story development, a BIG one that is and Feminist shennanigans happen at the same time, BAM Thor Odinson went poof, reborn as a human, as he slowly regaining his past life memories as an Asgardian, Jane Foster, his bald,cancer carrying mortal honeybun decides to pick up his mantle and the Mjolnir and BOOM, she became the New Thor…alhought Thor Odinson has also officially back as The Unworthy Thor...probably due to popular demand sooo…all and all, I think things are gonna get reallly confusing pretty soon if I keep explaining…"**_

Hestia and Loki was dumbstruck for a whole minute before Loki decided to say "You know, I was gonna ask you how in MY name can a mortal become Thor in this real but…I think it's better that I don't know…"

Hestia then asked "And what is this… 'Feminist' thing anyway?"

Gwen bluntly replied " _ **It's like retardation have sex with a brain tumor then have a baby"**_

A disgusted look appeared on Hestia's face as she said "Okkk….I think I know enough for one day…How are we gonna get back to our realm now?"

Gwen shrugs " _ **No biggie, we'll find MODOK, kick his ass…this time I'll send him into space on a nuke warhead just to be sure that he won't come back… grab that crystal I was hired to retrieve, Then after I receive the payment, we kill my employer, take the crystal back and send you guys home"**_

Loki seems skeptical as she said "Doesn't that plan sounds…kinda idiotic to you?"

Gwen shrugs _**"Well, with the moron's limited one digit IQ scale, that's the best plan he can come up with…but don't worry, it'll work…they always does…"**_

Loki then said "GOD you sound just like Wade" __

And thus, the night awkwardly passes, while Frank can be seen in the back of his van,cleaning his weapons.

…

 _ **The next morning…**_

"Gwen, Big floating head on TV is calling you out!" said Ronnie as she was watching the TV behind her counter.

It didn't take long for Gwen to slide down the stair's railing as she putting on her uniform.

Once she finally got her eyes on the screen, she can see MODOK, holding a bunch of elementary kids, inside of a school Bus hostage,with the Cystal she was tasked to retrieve, attached to some sort of energy projector gun, assuming to safetly creating portals using the stone's power.

The floating head then smile deviously as he said "Gwendolyn Pool! My message is simple, face me, or these kids will take a fieldtrip of a lifetime" as he pointed the crystal projector into the bus as the kids cries for help.

However, the camera seems to be on Live and still rolling, showing MODOK saying "I gotta say, I should have done it from the beginning…all those carefully layed, incospiculous and out of the public eyes plans never really worked and served as nothing more than time wasting shennanigans… Just put children's lives on the line and the heroes will flock to you like moth of a flameeee~~~~Muuuwahhahahhahahahahahahahahahaha!"

A bored look can be seen on Gwen's face as she said " _ **Seriously? It's like something only Joel Schumacher would dare to write… but then again… shouldn't the Avengers…or Spidey…or Thunderbolt…or the X-men already been there already…I mean… usually when minors's lives are in dangers, the heroes would've been already there in like…half a second and two panels…fighting with eachother to see who gets to save them…hmm…. All indication points toward the fact that this is a story about me… But just to be sure…"**_

She then pulls her smartphone out and dial Mile Morales's numbers and hold it to her ears.

However, what answered her call was Mile's answering system.

Right then, Gwen smiles as she pull down the mask over her face and said " _ **That's enough proof"**_

…

Punisher, who was leaning agaisnt his van, looking at something out in the streets, with a SR-15 in his hand shook his head as he saw Gwen and the goddesses walks out from Ronnie's store, carrying two big,pink bags on each of her hands.

As Gwen smiles brightly at him, Frank said "Took your sweet time huh?"

The girl nonchalantly replied " _ **Oh C'mon Frank, those kids are gonna be FINNEEE! MODOK won't lay a hand on them… it's not your comic remember?"**_

Frank, obviously have no idea what she's talking about, but having working with and against Wade long enough to know a thing or two, he decided to shrug it off and points at the direction he was looking at earlier and said "Well there he is kid… go nuts… it's your "comic" right?"

Gwen then look at the same direction, to find MODOK, the bus, a few of his agents holding a news crew hostage, in order to commandeer their camera obivously. And they're all standing just near the end of the street where Ronnie's tailor is.

It didn't take long for MODOK to spot Gwen and her company, the floating head didn't waste any moment as he shout "THERE YOU ARE GWEN! I WAS STARTING TO GET BOR…"

His sentence was cut off as MODOK saw a rocket flew right at his face, prompting him to block it with his arms upon impulse.

The impact knocks MODOK down, causing him to drop the crystal projector.

Before he can even get back up, MODOK's eyes shot wide open as he saw Gwen, leaping right toward him, with a Katana on one hand and a M16 on her other hand as she yell " _ **TIME FOR SOME GOR…"**_

Her sentence was cut short when the camera pans back to Frank and the goddesses, who was witnessing what seems to be a brutal beat down, with 80s ish sfx texts flying around, with the camera shook a couple times to add some cartoonish effect. In addition Loki can be seen covering Lili's eyes,who quickly ducked down to continue watching.

After about 7 seconds, the camera pans back to Gwen, with a couple of minor bruises, but no bleeding injuries whatsoever, standing in front of a downed MODOK, along with his henchmen,with the news crew still filming the whole incident.

Gwen then pouted as she look up in the sky as she said loudly " _ **Seriously? PG? What kind of shit is this? Batman v Superman? You think girls couldn't handles some blood and intestines on her face or outfit? HUH? HUH?What about Cecil HUH? Are You gonna bring him back?I thought you guys like light-hearted romancccceee, don't you?"**_

Then, as Gwen sighs and picks up the crystal projector she mumbles " _ **Worst, rushed chapter…ever…ughhh…"**_

Then, after another long sigh of disappointment, Gwen walks toward the goddesses and said " _ **Alrightttty…ready to head back home?"**_

…

 _ **Orario, the Twilight House…**_

"Where the heck IS that IDIOT?" snarled Shiklah as she sat at the dinner table, in front of the Loki Familia members, awkwardly stares at her.

Then, Riveria can be seen walks into the dinning hall, with a worried face while she said "I've just went to Hestia's Familia HQ aswell… nobody was home… and if my memory served me right… mister Wilson said that he was accompanying mister Cranel into the Dungeon…hmmm…"

Finn then said "I fear something bad is afoot…even mistress Loki and miss Aiz was nowhere to be found the entire day… Her grace never miss dinner before…"

Ellie put down her fork as she said "Is…my dad in danger?"

The moment she said so, a portal appeared round 2 meters above the Dinner table and spit out Hestia, Loki, Aiz, Hephaestus and Lili.

Finn quickly stood up and said "Your Grace! What happened?"

The flat-chested goddess jumps down from the table, wipes the food off of her clothes as she said "Long story…where's Wade?"

There was no answer, only worried looks on the faces of her childrens was seen.

Loki then asked "What? Did something happen?"

….

 _ **End of Chapter 18**_


End file.
